'Jigsaw': An Incomprehensive Film Review

by Malcolm Hardy 3 years ago in review

"Oh my god, is this another killing by the Jigsaw killer?"

'Jigsaw': An Incomprehensive Film Review
A situation more preferable than watching the film.  

For some reason, I went to watch this film. I've only seen Saw, Saw II, and Saw III, but I thought it would be a good idea to go watch this one, the eighth in the franchise.

So, here is a less-than-comprehensive review of the film, including some blatantly untrue facts.

The SAWnematic Universe

Jigsaw is the eighth film in this horror series, and there has been an incredible seven years since the last installment Saw 3D, AKA Saw VII, AKA Saw: The Final Chapter. And, crazy as it is, turns out it wasn't the final chapter.

I think that Saw (2004) is actually a pretty decent film, especially considering it was very low budget and set mainly in one room. However, as the series has gone on, it's become more and more of a convoluted mess. I guess that's what happens when you kill off the main villain in the third film, but keep producing sequels until you run it dry.

I have watched several YouTube videos trying to explain the ridiculous and impossible chronology of the series, and it just reaffirms the belief that I was justified to stop at Saw III.

Was there a story in this film?

Not as far as I could tell. Things were happening, of course, but I don't think it was meant to be a story. For example, there were some people in a room, and they were in Jigsaw's traps and whatever, but then the film kept cutting away from that to a random man who works for the police. And that man had a friend, whom he may or may not trust. And one of the detectives he knows may or may not be a bad guy, and another one of the detectives is about as smart as a paperclip. And then they all go to a place, and something happens there. But it's probably not a story.

Were there any saws in this movie?

Makita; the newest villain in the franchise.

There were a few saws in the first trap, the bucket-head one (as seen in the image above.)

But what is really stunning about this film is the big, shocking third act twist! It is revealed that the mastermind behind all the traps this time around is an £83.83 teal-coloured Makita Jigsaw.

He explains that he was just a normal Jigsaw tool like any other, until he was caught in a trap himself and learned to see life in a new light. He was taken on as an apprentice by John Kramer (AKA Jigsaw), and graduated to main villain in this film. Hence the title Jigsaw rather than Saw.

Is the film scary?

Not really, no. If you're not a fan of gore then you won't like it, but there are no big scares to speak of. And even the gore isn't on the level of the other Saw films. If you're in the mood for a scary movie then you'd be better off staying at home and watching that scene from Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971) where they go on that horrifying boat ride.

Is the film scarily good?

Not at all. The level of acting on show here would not look out of place on a network television show such as CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, CSI: New York, or even CSI: Miami. The plot was convoluted, the score was boring, the visuals were bland, and the characters were all shallow and one-dimensional. Even Tobin Bell's complicated return to the series as John Kramer didn't lift the material, especially under the ridiculous circumstances. And, as I literally just mentioned, it's not scary at all. The film even manages to turn 1 hour 32 minutes into an experience that feels closer to three hours.

Who made the movie?

The Spierig twins - Seen here pretending to like each other.

The Spierig Brothers.

Good ol' Michael Spierig and Peter Spierig.

Best known for their work on Predestination, Daybreakers, and the creatively titled Undead.

The only trivia on their individual IMDb pages are that they are the twin of the other.

I have nothing else to say about them really. They seem like good guys, I suppose, hard to tell from this photo alone.

Should you go see 'Jigsaw'?

I would say... No.

Don't go see it. There are much better ways of spending 92 minutes.

Like walking from across the island of Guernsey from The Cobo Bay Hotel to the La Vallette Underground Military Museum. Take a look:

A nice walk across the second largest of the Channel Islands; Guernsey.

The route, if you're interested..

You can have a look at my "Incomprehensive Review of Geostorm" here.

Follow me on Twitter.

Malcolm  Hardy
Malcolm Hardy
Read next: Best Customizable Games
Malcolm Hardy

Film fan. Bartender.

Bad film reviewer; A reviewer of bad films? Or a film reviewer who is bad at it? You decide.

Bad bartender at Groovy Spoons.

Follow me on Twitter: @MrMalcolmHardy

See all posts by Malcolm Hardy