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Fleeing the Plumber

Princess Peach takes refuge in her fiancé's castle

By Deanna CassidyPublished 3 years ago 3 min read
1
Princess Peach and King Bowser in Paper Mario for the Nintendo 64 (2000)

I pull a turnip from the ground and throw it at the block above me. A green mushroom falls from the block and I catch it handily. A tall cliff looms ahead of me, but I see another block nearby. With one more well-aimed turnip, I hit the second block and watch a beanstalk erupt from it. Leaves alternate sides on the stalk, close enough together for me to climb without any adjustments to my long pink gown.

Two koopas with red shells pace the top of the cliff. They bow when they see me.

"Your highness! So honored to see you," one says.

"At your service!" the other adds.

"Thank you," I tell them. "Please be careful. The plumber isn't far behind, and I'm afraid he has the powers of a fire flower."

"Thank you for the warning," the first koopa replies gallantly. "We will hold him off for as long as we can."

"At your service!" the second repeats, bowing again.

I quickly reach the other side of the cliff. I can see platforms below me with more koopas and other friends. But, there is something ahead: a row of blocks in the air. I back up, run full speed to the edge of the cliff, and jump. I hover through the air, maintaining my altitude for a moment, before gently drifting down to the row.

I can very clearly see the path ahead of me. Two hammer bros pace in front of a flag before a small fortress. I could walk through and continue the journey on foot, but I've got a good feeling about this platform.

I pluck more turnips from below me and toss them upwards experimentally. One hits an invisible block, dropping a coin down to me and leaving the empty block in clear view. I jump on top of it and throw more turnips. I hit another hidden block, activating a second beanstalk.

I climb.

I find myself standing on sturdy clouds, high in the sky. A key sits on the cloud at my feet, and a lock floats in front of me. I put the former in the latter and watch with satisfaction as a door opens out of nowhere. I step through.

On the other side, I find a large stone castle with a moat of lava. I breathe a sigh of relief.

Spike koopas bow as I cross the heavy wooden drawbridge. "Your Highness! So pleased to see you safe!"

"Thank you," I tell them. "Keep an eye out. I don't know if the plumber will find my shortcut, or take the long way around. He's coming."

"Yes, ma'am," one says.

"We will do everything in our power to ensure your safety, Princess!" agrees another.

The castle is full of friendly faces. Magikoopas, shy guys, and bob-ombs greet me warmly. I haven't even gotten through the entrance hall before King Bowser rushes out of his office and charges at me.

He picks me up in his strong, loving arms and spins me with delight. "Beloved!" he says. "My darling Peach. I was worried sick. Why didn't you let me come get you?"

I kiss his nose affectionately. "I knew I could handle the journey just fine. And besides, you had to rally your troops and prepare your defenses."

He gives me an earnest look. "Your safety and comfort are my top priority."

"And you're ensuring both, by keeping that horrible plumber at bay."

He kisses my forehead. "Beloved. You've had a long journey. Can I offer you some tea and cake? An ultrashroom? Yoshi cookies, fresh berries?"

"Tea would be lovely," I say.

We walk hand in hand to the dining room. I don't know how long I have before hearing more news about the plumber, but for now at least, I can relax.

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Based on a prompt by u/SilentJoe1986 in r/WritingPrompts: "[WP] You're a princess on the run from a crazed plumber with supernatural abilities. Unfortunately there is no other castles [sic] in the kingdoms you can flee to and decide its [sic] time to make your final stand along side your betrothed. King Bowser."

fan fiction
1

About the Creator

Deanna Cassidy

(she/her) This establishment is open to wanderers, witches, harpies, heroes, merfolk, muses, barbarians, bards, gargoyles, gods, aces, and adventurers. TERFs go home.

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