Egghead Exchange

"Logan's" POV

I gripped onto my head due to the intense pain from my experiment. I intended on using it to explore other realms of existence to research for the sake of my curiosity and possibly future benefit. Unfortunately (and typical) for me, something went wrong and electricity scattered throughout my body.

I opened my eyes to see if there was anything I needed to repair. However, I found myself in a bedroom that consisted of various bookshelves, a desk with a chair and writing utensils that looked like they were stored in empty jam jars, a wardrobe with many neckties of dark blue, black shirts, dark jeans, astronomical pajamas and what seemed like a onesie resembling a unicorn, and a ceiling that resembled outer space. I released my head from my grip upon realizing that I felt hair touching my... fingers? I looked at the parts of the body I could view and confirmed that I had human arms and hands and fingers. I placed the fingers on my face and lightly jumped upon feeling glasses, a nose, and lips. I looked down to confirm that I was wearing dark jeans similar to the ones in the wardrobe.

After seeing a device by a window similar to the device I was using, I went towards the wardrobe slowly and glanced at a mirror. I didn't know if I wanted to see who would look back at me, but I finally decided the day would be more tolerable if I did. I placed myself in front of the mirror within the door of the wardrobe and saw a human face with brown hair and brown eyes. It was moving the same way I was making it.

"Wh-Who am I?" a different voice from my own erupted from my new lips.

Logan's POV

I silently winced in pain from the electricity invading my body. I was hoping it didn't do severe damage to me let alone Thomas. I opened my eyes and was surprised to find myself in what seemed like a laboratory with concrete walls. I touched my face in amazement and realized I couldn't feel my glasses anywhere. In a frantic search, I took notice of black wings where my arms and hands should be. I found a nearby mirror and was surprised to see the face of... a penguin looking back at me complete with a beak, a widows peak, and blue eyes instead of my familiar brown eyes.

"Who is this?" exited the beak in a voice that differed severely from Thomas's.

I was about to wander around the laboratory, but I stopped upon hearing white noise coming from somewhere. I noticed there was a device similar to the one I put together for the sake of inter-dimensional exploration, but I realized that wasn't the source of the white noise. Why did I know? Because the white noise in my head soon faded and I heard a man with the exact same voice that came out of the beak declare, "How many ties can a human own?" and I thought Hey, serious people wear neckties! before hearing the same voice proclaim Um, who's there? Since it seemed like the owner of the penguin body heard my thoughts, I decided to carry on the "conversation" without speaking.

Hello, would you happen to be in a bedroom with a ceiling that looks like space?

Yes, and I'm guessing you're in a laboratory, right?

Guess I was right. Well... I'm Logan and I'm guessing I'm communicating with a penguin?

Yes. Well, I might as well give my identity considering the circumstances. My name is Kowalski and I'm in awe that I'm communicating with a human.

Well, less of a human and more of the embodiment of a homosexual human's logical thinking.

Were you trying to explore other universes?

Yes, if you were, too, then I guess it's a figuratively small multiverse.

I looked at the device Kowalski had in his laboratory and noticed an image of my bedroom was in full view including what looked like me bent over looking at my own device.

How do you suggest we return to our familiar lives, Kowalski?

Well, if a simultaneous electric shock while picking up each other's signals figuratively put us in each other's shoes, then the same thing should restore us.

Alright, I can't believe I'm saying this, but I guess we have to intentionally fail—

"Kowalski!"

A loud voice boomed before I saw another penguin out the corner of my eye kicked the door down.

I turned to face him and he looked shorter and extremely angry, almost like Virgil, except bolder and with blue eyes.

"You can't go tinkering at your deadly devices all day! We've got work to do!" the penguin with authority shouted at me before leaving.

Looks like I have your plans to take care of. By the way, who's the penguin with the booming voice and a head as flat as Naan?

Oh, that's our group's leader, Skipper. Stay off his bad side. There's a much shorter one with a sweeter personality named Private and the closest in height is this penguin named Rico who can easily be identified by the mohawk, scar, love of chaos, speech impediment and... unique ability.

What kind of unique ability?

You'll see.

I was leaving the laboratory and took in the scenery. It looked like the penguins of the universe I was occupying had a bunker similar to that of military personnel. As I looked around to explore, I was still communicating with Kowalski.

Now, who should I be warned about?

Well, as stated before, I'm the embodiment of a homosexual human's logical thinking, so, as well as him, there are others you should be aware of for better or worse.

Like whom?

Well, there's this thespian named Roman who is so full of himself. He's recognized by attire of mainly white and red and his massive ego, but he does have a humane side to him. He's the embodiment of this homosexual human's creativity.

Sounds more humane than the self proclaimed lemur king next door.

There's also this man with the cat hoodie around his shoulders who's so sweet he could figuratively put anyone in a sugar coma. His name is Patton, he's recognized by his puns and loving personality, I'm guessing like that guy, Private, and he's the embodiment of the homosexual human's emotions and morals.

Okay, let's make it simple, what is this homosexual human's name?

Oh, right, Thomas Sanders. His job consists of making online content.

Thank you. Also, about the way you described this Patton guy, might you have an interest in him?

Um, moving on, there's also the grown man who identifies as an edgy teenager. His name is Virgil, you can find him just by looking at his purple attire, if you stroke his hair just right, you'll get cute purrs out of him like a cat, and he's the embodiment of Thomas's anxiety.

Alright, I thought you favored the pun-lover.

Well, I have strong feelings for both, but that's not what this is about. There are darker embodiments that you'll have to make sure don't figuratively get under your skin. One of them is coated with black and yellow and has scales on half of his face. He goes by the alias Deceit and is in charge of making Thomas lie as well as identifying lies within him. The other guy is coated in black and green and is the only one of us who has facial hair not counting eyebrows. His name is Remus, he's Roman's brother, and he's the embodiment of Thomas's intrusive thoughts, basically the socially unwelcome side of creativity.

If you need me to fight them, I've got a trick or two up your sleeve.

That won't be necessary, but thank you.

After some exploring, I climbed a ladder up through a whole and what I saw had me bewildered: I found myself in what seemed to be the Central Park Zoo in Manhattan, New York. I also started to understand that I and the others were denizens of the exhibit meant to accommodate penguins. The three penguins Kowalski was familiar with all leapt through the whole and started to smile and wave as the guests came by. After a glance from the smallest one, I joined in as well.

I guess we'll have to stay in touch until the end of the day.

Agreed. Be careful so Skipper doesn't suspect you.

Morning-Afternoon

Logan's POV

From what I was able to quickly figure out, when the zoo wasn't completely filled with guests, the group of peculiar penguins found the freedom to act like they were part of the military or at least a group of commandos. Although Thomas was never exactly a fighter growing up, the combination of my ability to quickly soak in information and Kowalski's guidance upon me describing the actions or the time of the day worked in my favor. It didn't take me long to admire the agility, especially when it came to the group leaping out of the habitat every once in a while.

There were some things that I wasn't exactly prepared for such as Rico making some moves at me when Skipper wasn't paying attention. I mean, I knew he was intending to make those moves toward Kowalski, but it still concerns me. I was okay with my figurative gaydar being activated, but Kowalski mentioned having a mutual "falling out" with a dolphin named Doris, so it's unclear of how he would react to the flirting.

As well as leaping out of the habitat every once in a while, we were also able to leap into the other habitats to aid the other animals in certain problems. With a quick trick Kowalski instructed me through, I was able to pull out a clipboard with some options illustrated. Although, Skipper would make it a point to slap it out of my wrist or slap me across the face if I was talking too much. I would occasionally mutter something like, "Humans have HR departments in their work environment for this reason," and he would slap me again and say, "Well, we aren't humans and we are our own help." Kowalski would warn me to just keep my mouth shut and I could just imagine him rolling my eyes upon hearing my thoughts.

Kowalski's POV

It took me longer than I'd like to admit to get used to the fact that I wasn't in a hostile environment. When I felt the presence of an unfamiliar life-form approaching me, I'd take Skipper's with my eyes closed and fight them off with my survival instincts until they gave a verbal reaction to a thud on the floor. I'd open my eyes, see that it was one of the embodiments Logan informed me about, and get flustered. They'd ask what was wrong with me and I'd say, "Um, pardon me, but a nightmare spiked up my heart rate and my fight or flight has been kicking in," before informing Logan of my mishap.

Two reactions to my attack stood out to me, though. One of them was when I was using my survival instincts against one of the embodiments and another one, Virgil, seemed to have a shocked expression on his face. I noticed I had the embodiment known as Remus in a choke hold and that a ninja star was stuck to the fridge. I thought of what I did and heard Logan declare You did what? He's the least predictable of all of us! with me responding I guess Skipper's lesson on listening to my gut stuck like Remus's ninja star. The other reaction that stood out to me was when I was going through this streaming site called Netflix hoping to find anything remotely close to "Shirtless Ninja Action Theater." I was trying and failing to find it when, suddenly, I felt somebody about to touch my shoulder and I retaliated by flipping the culprit over the couch until I saw I was in combat with the embodiment named Roman. I had to admit, he was amazing at fighting, but then, he made a samurai sword appear in his hands and it made me realize I could do something similar. I chose to fight with a fencing sword and let the combat continue. Eventually, we were both out of breath and he glanced at me.

"I know you can fight off the Dark Sides, but damn, where has this side of you been?" he asked me.

As I was informing of what happened, I knew Roman was basically talking to Logan, but I felt pride in my fighting techniques being put to good use.

"I, um, I guess when you stop thinking for a while, what you learn just comes out without any inhibitions," I excused.

"Well, maybe we can fight the Dragon Witch together, sometime," he suggested.

We came to a position where we were trying to shake hands, but something told me Roman was going to flip me, so I stood my ground while trying to flip him. I could feel him tense up from supposedly trying to do the same. We looked at each other and gave each other smirks.

I went into the kitchen without much thought and Logan and I exchanged input on our days while I was looking for something to have for lunch. I noticed there were multiple jam jars like the ones in Logan's room and I grabbed one of them to read. Yes, I was taking advantage of the fact I had developed the ability to read. The jam said "Crofters" and had a picture similar to Logan's reflection and I saw the label also said "Logan's Berry."

Vain, much? I joked.

Why do you ask that?

You're on a jam jar!

Thomas and his team made a deal with Crofters. Besides, it's the only jelly I put in my belly.

I hope it's not overrated.

I'm guessing you grabbed the Logan's Berry one. It has blackberry and pomegranate. Give it a try, if you want.

I decided to bring the jar to the table and opened it. Suddenly, I remembered I had the ability to manifest things out of thin air, so I proceeded to make a platter of sushi appear next to me as well as make the top of the open jar wider. I grabbed a spoon from one of the drawers and went with the plan of scooping my sushi into the jar with the spoon. It was coated in the jam and I took a deep breath before putting it in my mouth. I knew sushi was great before, but it was amazing when coated in the jam. I went to get more of the jam to try different flavors and summoned more sushi. I didn't think anyone saw or cared about what I was doing, so I felt no shame.

Afternoon-Evening

Kowalski's POV

After hearing about Logan doing his best to tolerate the antics of Skipper and what else my life had to offer as well as learning more from his life and Thomas, we decided that it would be a good idea to attempt to return to our lives at 7:30. I was standing next to Logan's device and was able to identify which parts gave him the shock. I tried to reach out to him and I even looked through the window of his device, but I couldn't see or hear him.

As I was squinting, I heard the door open behind me. I didn't take long for me to notice that it was Virgil that had entered the room.

"Lo? Are you okay?" he asked.

"Huh? Oh yes, Virgil. I'm just working on an experiment," I excused.

I turned back around and stiffened before soon relaxing as I felt Virgil's arms around me and himself against my back.

"Lo, whether it's for Thomas or for yourself, you're always working too hard. You should know better than anyone about the health risks of that," the man whispered.

"But, I—I mean we aren't human," I tried to claim.

"That doesn't mean I'm not going to worry," Virgil retorted.

Virgil grabbed me by the hand and I followed him to the living room where Patton was waiting on the couch. He gave a massive smile upon seeing us.

"Muffin! Logy Bear!" he proclaimed before hugging us both.

Although I knew part of the hug was meant to be for Logan, something about the hug made me realize how very little affection my team had shared with one another apart from Private or rare occasions. I guess even the manliest of us want to experience a genuine embrace every once in a while.

Patton brought us to the couch and we were all watching this film called "Christopher Robin" with Patton in the middle. I hadn't heard Logan try to reach out to me, so I managed to reach out to him to inform him of my whereabouts.

"Back away from the imposter!" I heard before lifted into the air and behind the couch by an unseen force.

I looked around and I saw Roman enter the room as I was getting up. I noticed Virgil and Patton pause their movie and look confused.

"Imposter? Have we been cuddling Deceit?!" Virgil shouted.

Just then, Deceit appeared next to the fancy-dressed man.

"Um, I'm right here, but I also know that it takes a masquerader to know a masquerader," the lizard man stared at me with eyes of brown.

"I thought it was suspicious that he was able to keep up with me in a battle and try to justify not thinking," Roman stared daggers at me.

"Plus, while Logan does eat Crofters straight from the jar often, he doesn't taint it with fish!" Deceit proclaimed and I tried my best not to look offended.

Virgil seemed to think before he had a look of what looked like realization on his face.

"Logan himself described Remus as unpredictable. How did he predict how to dodge the Duke's attacks?" Virgil contributed.

"You know what? This is getting out of hand!" I shouted.

Everyone in the room stared at me for a few seconds before Patton proclaimed, "That's not Logan! But if that's not Logan, then who is he?" I wasn't sure if I ceased to say something only Logan would, but I knew that, since the day was near its end, I could no longer keep up the charade.

"Everybody, follow me," I proclaimed while heading for Logan's room.

I showed them all the device and explained our situation in Layman's Terms.

"So, if Logan is wherever you're from, then what do we call you?" Roman asked.

"Well, call me Kowalski," I answered.

Finally, I heard Logan's voice trying to reach out to me.

Kowalski? Sorry I went silent. I thought I could logic my way out of this one, but I need help!

What's going on, Logan?

Skipper was suspicious and won't let me into the lab!

I guess I had a concerned look on my face, because Patton said "What's going on?"

"A friend of mine might use force to interrogate Logan!"

Logan's POV

Skipper had asked me various questions in a tone in a way that implied he knew something. I spent so much time trying to keep the conversation going until he would allow me to leave for the lab that I wasn't able to reach out to Kowalski. After another attempt to get to the lab, Skipper pulled me away and forced me into combat. After several bruises caused by both of us, he shouted his suspicions and called for the other penguins for back up. Meanwhile, I called for mental back up.

Kowalski? Sorry I went silent. I thought I could logic my way out of this one, but I need help!

What's going on, Logan?

Skipper was suspicious and won't let me into the lab!

I found myself pinned down by some books and Skipper called for Rico to "lack decency." I didn't see how, but the next thing I saw was Rico with a powerful chainsaw.

I think Rico is going to saw off my head! He's dangerously close!

Are you still able to use my wings?

Yes, I just can't get up right now!

Punch Rico's gut!

Wait, why?

If you haven't seen his unique ability, yet, you are about to. Punch his gut!

With plenty of struggle, I did as I was told and I was in awe as I saw Rico upchuck items such as a bomb, a bowling ball, a tennis racket, and even a few syringes.

"Needles!" I heard Skipper shout before he knocked himself out running into a wall.

Private removed the books from my body and helped me up.

"Thanks, Private," I told him.

"Skipper's gut said that you weren't Kowalski. So, who are you?" the British penguin asked me.

"My name is Logan. But, hurry to the lab with me before Skipper regains consciousness!" I answered.

Private followed me into the lab without question and, through the window of Kowalski's device, I saw everyone in my room except Remus.

"Skipper has been taken care of for now!" I told the penguin taking over my body.

"Was it needles?" he asked.

"Yep, he ran from needles," I told him.

"Kowalski?" Private questioned resulting in my hand waving to him.

"Is that you, Microsoft Nerd?" Roman asked.

"I'm still me, Princey," I responded.

I identified the part of Kowalski's device that gave him the shocked and looked at him.

"Are you ready to do this?" I asked.

"I'm ready, though, I'll miss being hugged and having fingers," he responded with a chuckle.

Everyone backed away and we proceeded to shock ourselves again. Everything was hurting as heat increased all over my body before things went black.

As I was coming to, I was hearing Patton's voice say "Logan? Logan! Please come back to us, Logy!" before I opened my eyes to see all the Sides except Remus staring down at me. I sat up slowly and was immediately hugged by Patton.

"Don't scare us like that again!" Virgil told me.

I knew Virgil wasn't the time to hug when everyone else was around, so I wasn't too upset.

I turned around and saw on the device that Private was helping Kowalski up. There was a chuckle from him that was in the same voice I used throughout the day.

"How are you feeling, Kowalski?" I asked.

"It's not the first time I've been shocked by science," he responded.

"You know, it might be worth pointing out that platonic cuddling is possible," I informed him.

Kowalski looked at Private and chuckled nervously.

"I'll keep that in mind when Skipper and Rico are out. By the way, you should try putting Crofters on sushi. It's really good," he told me.

I was speechless for a while before I heard Deceit chuckle.

"Well, until I find the time to try it out, I'll probably have Remus try that," I joked.

We all waved some goodbyes from different universes and I went to the couch with Virgil and Patton as they asked questions about what it was like being a penguin.

Kowalski's POV

By the time Private and I left the lab, Skipper woke up and stared at me. He glared at me before looking at the door.

"Experiment gone wrong?" he asked.

"Pretty much, but everything is sorted out," I answered.

"Well, why didn't you just say so?" he asked while getting himself some coffee.

"In such an intense situation, you wouldn't let him—I mean me," I answered before Private and I winked at each other.