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Content vs "content"

(aka Critical Thinking vs Escapism)

By Kerri PhilpottPublished 4 years ago 5 min read
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This morning I quite happily unsubscribed from a YouTube channel and it was for very personal reasons. I can't say the content creator intended to piss me off as it is very much my personal makeup and where I am in my own journey right now that made me get angry.

I should tell you the content creator is a member of the LGBTQ community. But that's not why I unsubscribed. I try to be an ally in whatever way I can so I do support LGBTQ content in whatever way I can. I recommend movies like the extraordinary beautiful but painful movie Close Knit to people who I feel might appreciate it.

I've also been watching couples share their lives, especially in Asian countries where they have to be relatively careful about their relationships. The channel from which I unsubscribed is operated by a single man. He said a couple of times in his videos, via translation, that he had been single for 3 years. He seemed to present a sweet side so I did feel a little bad for this described 3 year wait. He does film his friends and invite guests to appear on camera. At one point, his guest was a sweet boy about 4-5 years younger than him. He appeared as a guest about half a dozen times and then, suddenly, the next video was titled (We Got Married) Our First Date and First Night. Good for him (and them) I thought, the 3 year drought is over and via that past half a dozen videos he's found this kid endearing enough to date him. Now the next video had a bit of a click-bait type title: Shall We...Be Apart for a While? In this, they quite adorably went shopping, made and ate a lovely meal, and then he sent the boy off to visit his parents.

Now, inherently, there is nothing wrong with either of those videos. Both participants agreed to be in them, they were quite well shot and edited, and they presented a relationship that, for me, was quite easy to invest in. Two days later however, the channel owner posted a video that put the previous 2 into dispute and 2 days after that, today, I finally got a bilingual person in their live chat to confirm for me that it wasn't a relationship, it was "content."

So yes, I'm going to say I felt deceived and cheated after being persuaded through those 2 subtitled videos that there was no actually relationship to support and the exchanged "darlings" had all been in the name of increasing subscribers, emotionally manipulative bullshit I wrote in the comments. But I own the feeling, it is my fault, something within me that made me want to believe something was happening and those 2 had a shot at being happy. "Don't be so serious!" I was told in chat. Some told me to just come for the cuteness. Sorry, no, that's what Instagram's for. So I unsubscribed.

There are couples who are presenting what they can of the realities of their relationships. Yos, an Indonesian kid who lives here in Canada with his French-Canadian partner Max, shared the very difficult story about how he escaped Indonesia after his family found out he was gay and even shot a video for the people coveting their relationship to remind them that 5-10 minute videos posted once a week were not going to show them everything there was about the relationship.

I also subscribe to Lucas and Kibo's channel. They're Chinese and, of all the couples whose channels I watch, I think being open about their relationship, even if it's only on YouTube, presents more danger than for the Korean couples doing the same. They keep it pretty light and goofy and, for good reason I imagine, inside the house. They are both working on their English as well, so it's really easy to encourage them.

As far as Korean couples, I am subscribed to 2 channels, Hyugayso and Allbbang. The couple on the Hyugayso channel obscure their faces digitally or with sunglasses or masks. This, they explained in one video (and to my understanding) was done to ensure their audience was there for content and not cute faces. Perfect. As for the couple on the Allbbang channel, I have to believe they are presenting as much realism as possible because I have heard way too much about how much Bbang likes All's butt and how extremely jealous All was of anyone who even went near Bbang before they were officially dating. On the down/sad side, when they do shoot outside, it is kind of sad to watch them glance both ways before choosing to be affectionate with each other even though, by western standards, what they usually exchange isn't much more than a peck.

The only channel I now follow operated by a single person from the LGBTQ community is a Korean named Namgyu. Again, by western standards, I think he would be described as a slightly catty Queen. But he embraces it. He tends to fall in love (very briefly) with every guest. His most frequent guest of late has been Jeongro, a 25-year-old who, to paraphrase Namgyu, thought it was a good idea to open a bar in the middle of an epidemic. Anyway, because I think Namgyu thinks of him at this point as a goofy little brother, he shows up much more frequently than other guests and he has told his viewers upfront that Jeongro has a boyfriend. But that does not stop him from getting Jeongro drunk and convincing him that if he didn't dance on camera his bar would go under. Spoiler: Jeongro did dance and Namgyu was quite pleased.

There is plenty of LGBTQ content to support and enjoy and I don't think I'm missing out after today's unsubscription. But, to be clear, I do know that what I believe about the two videos described above is what I chose to believe and not necessarily what the channel's owner was trying to portray. My opinions and feelings, after all, are mine.

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