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At the Cinema: Jan to Mid-March '22

A List

By Annie KapurPublished 2 years ago 7 min read
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At the Cinema: Jan to Mid-March '22
Photo by GR Stocks on Unsplash

I know I'm late, you don't have to tell me. I said I'd be back in January and I wasn't and that was mainly because I hadn't really watched a lot of new stuff back in that month - it was a nasty ride for me mentally and emotionally, let's put it that way. Long story short, I spent a lot of my watch-time replaying The Trial of the Chicago Seven because of Sacha Baron Cohen looking h-o-t. It was also the same reason I replayed Les Miserables.

Don't you dare pretend you didn't read that. Or, I will make you read it again.

Anyways, by the end of February, I had watched a lot more films in the cinemas, not all of them were all that amazing but there were some stunners in there. If you don't know how I work when it comes to the cinema, I enjoy going at night. By night, I don't mean 6pm-8pm-ish, I mean more near to midnight or the next morning than the evening time. This is mainly because you actually get to watch the movie without distraction. People aren't on their phones or talking or eating loudly. Anyone who is there is either hyper-fixated on the film or has already fallen asleep so everyone's happy. Also, the great 'no children' policy is invoked after about 8-9pm which is always a plus. And finally, I can drink alcohol in peace whilst calmly cuddled up to nobody in the seat next to me for extra room.

(Note: I am approximately 5ft 2 height, why I would need extra room is beyond me as well as you, don't worry).

At the Cinema: Jan to Mid-March '22

The King's Man

Image from Disney+

Rating out of 5: 3.5

I really wanted to give this film a 4 or something but it was just so incredibly boring that I couldn't. When I find a film boring it is usually because they are trying to shove cliché humour down my throat. Humour, written badly. However, the acting was great and the story looked good too. At least it was better than whatever the last two were - those were horrendous. I liked the fact that it was well and truly the most predictable film ever though - I felt like if it had unpredictability it would've gotten a lower score. If I'm going to be perfectly honest, the score is awarded for acting and story only. Otherwise, I wasn't overly interested in the movie. It just felt like another run-of-the-mill lets-make-fun-of-James-Bond thing. If you want that, then Johnny English is much funnier and has far better writing - even though I don't find that very funny either.

All in all, it's difficult to make me laugh.

Scream

Image from 'Bloody-Flicks'

Rating out of 5: 5

Yes, you read that correctly, Scream got a 5/5 score. Why? Well, when I was a child/teen, I grew up loving the Scream films and loving Ghostface. I thought that the premise was so utterly silly that it worked as a very satirical film. This newest instalment was amazing as well. Scream relies on its funny satirical atmosphere to get it through the cusp of the story of trying to figure out who Ghostface is. Now, if you're like me who guessed it at the beginning of the film then you have watched far too much Scream. Honestly, I was so happy to see this movie. I hope there's another one in the works!

Jackass Forever

Image from 'VitalThrills'

Rating out of 5: 5

It's been a decade since I watched Jackass. I really did forget how much I watched it as a kid and how much I probably shouldn't have. In my defence, I was left unsupervised. Seeing this again really brought back some really fun memories and made me really, really happy. Some of the classic stunts were brought back and some moments that they probably should've kept to themselves were on camera. I think everyone got scared when Johnny Knoxville tapped out though - like the world had heart attacks simultaneously. An absolutely brilliant film that deserves all the adoration it gets.

I'd pay good money to see this movie again. I sure hope they make another one (though, make sure Knoxville doesn't tap out again - that scared the pants off me; my whole childhood flashed before my damn eyes).

Death on the Nile

Image from 'The DisInsider'

Rating out of 5: 3

I wanted to like this film because of the fact I like the book too. But with some bad stints in the writing department, the awful 'acting' of Gal Gadot and the overly long exposition that lasts for just about an hour, this film gets pushed down to a mere 3/5. I will say that two actresses I did like though were Emma Mackey and Letitia Wright, who were both really brilliant in their roles. I think that Armie Hammer though was probably the most replacable guy in the room who would have been much better being played by the guy who played Andrei in War and Peace by the BBC. However, the movie itself is not bad - the problem is that it isn't very good either. Kenneth Branagh has to rethink this one - I mean the last one was embarrassing.

Uncharted

Image from Flickreel

Rating out of 5: 2

Unfortunately, this film really failed me. I found it too much of a mash-up of other, more successful movies that did everything that Uncharted was trying to do, but better. The storyline was lacklustre and did I see a bullet proof wall-guard turn from plastic into glass? That couldn't have been just me. Filled with generic one-liners and Tom Holland's American accent that doesn't seem to have a state to it, this movie really pulled itself down with its own reliance on the generational differences between its two stars. Why? Well, because that overshadowed the entire premise of the film at times. Once or twice, it's funny to make a joke out of. But when you're hitting 20-30 times (and I counted), it becomes tired, weary and annoying. The film is riddled with plot holes and mistakes, one of which is which way did Tom Holland know to turn the compass key things? They would have worked well down too; how did he know it was meant to point up? This is just one of the errors the film fails to explain away.

This film is something that I can't say I'll see again but you should definitely see for yourselves to make a judgement.

Dog

Image from YouTube

Rating out of 5: 4

No matter how much I dislike Channing Tatum, I have to say he did a pretty good job here. I actually only went to see this film because the dog was cute and I like dogs. I was pleased to see that there was more than one dog and also, there was a very heartfelt and often overlooked story about the bond between the dog and its previous friend in the army. The journey that our protagonist must now make with this dog changes the dog's behaviours and attitudes towards him and I think that was actually pretty clever considering how low budget the film was and how 'comedic' it was trying to be. This is one of those movies you watch on a rainy day with some warm popcorn and a piping hot cup of black coffee, bundled up in a blanket. I'd be pretty happy to watch this film again some time.

The Duke

Rating out of 5: 5

This was such a fun movie to watch. I love it when films don't take themselves too seriously and they actually try to make the audience laugh whilst telling a good story. I went to see this with high hopes and was not disappointed. It was witty, it was clever and it was based on a true story, which I thought was really pretty cool too. The fact that it had that guy from Cloud Atlas and Harry Potter starring in it made it even better overall. I would definitely want to watch this again some time soon because it is just brilliant. More importantly than anything though - it had Helen Mirren.

The Batman

Rating out of 5: 5

Yes, I saw The Batman and let me tell you this without any spoiler whatsoever: I would pay good money to see that again. From Robert Pattinson's Batman to Paul Dano's The Riddler, I thought that this Batman, different from the other movies in the stratosphere, had more potential to become a long-running series of films instead of a stand-alone or a trilogy. To be honest, it doesn't beat The Dark Knight for me, but it's definitely third after Batman 1989. And I have to say, if I don't get to see Paul Dano again I will be very angry indeed.

Cyrano

Rating Out of 5: 5

I went to see this with some other people and honestly, all I can say is that it was amazing and I absolutely adored it and I wish I could watch it again. It was just surreal. I love the story of Cyrano and I have read and watched it in many forms, many different times. I think that this has to be one of the best adaptations of the story I have ever seen though. I mean it was just so beautiful and the film was so well-acted and pretty. I might just watch it again because I think I am in love with it.

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About the Creator

Annie Kapur

200K+ Reads on Vocal.

English Lecturer

🎓Literature & Writing (B.A)

🎓Film & Writing (M.A)

🎓Secondary English Education (PgDipEd) (QTS)

📍Birmingham, UK

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