Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom Confuses Players Stuck in Endless Texas Hold'em Poker Matches

As a video game enthusiast, I was thrilled to hear about the release of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom. The trailers promised an epic adventure filled with thrilling battles, puzzling mysteries, and rich characters. But after playing for several hours, I found myself stuck in an endless cycle of poker matches, with no end in sight.

It seems that the developers of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom have taken a unique approach to gameplay. Instead of the traditional hero's journey, players are forced to navigate a treacherous world of high-stakes poker, where victory is the only way to progress. While some may appreciate the challenge, many players have been left frustrated and confused.

You start the game in a poker match against Daruk, Mipha, and Revali, putting in ever-increasing rupee antes as the game progresses. Breaks between tournaments give you the chance to catch grasshoppers, cook meals, and create elixirs in order to give yourself an edge on the table. Although, no one has figured out how 'stronger attacks' do anything helpful in a poker game.

Here is a look at the game.

It was an odd sight to see Link sitting at the poker table, his green tunic and hat standing out among the other players. But there he was, his intense gaze fixed on the cards as he tried to maintain his poker face. The other players, a motley crew of characters that had seemed to have no business playing cards together, such as Ganon, an Octorok, and Princess Zelda herself, who is keeping Ganon at bay, exchanged confused glances as the hero of Hyrule contemplated how playing poker was going to save the day.

As the game progressed, as Link, I proved to be a formidable opponent, quickly amassing a large pile of rupees. The other players grumbled as they folded, one by one, even Princess Zelda was lost in a wild twist of fate in one hand, leaving only Ganon left in the game. The stakes were high, and before the flop, with a mismatched hand of a 2 of hearts and a 7 of spades I went all in against the Demon King.

It was suicide.

My hands were sweaty on the controller. Ganon grinned triumphantly as he revealed his hand, pocket rockets, a pair of aces. An Ace of hearts and an Ace of clubs. My gut dropped. I had certainly lost all of Hyrule with the worst bet ever.

Then the flop came, on the table 3 cards were laid out. A 2 of spades, a King of hearts, and an Ace of Diamonds.

This wasn't looking good and I could see Zelda watching, her stupid blind faith in me never faltering as Ganon lead with 3-of-a-kind Aces against my pair of 2s.

The turn comes up, it's a 2 of diamonds. My mouth went dry. Should I give in to hope? We both had 3-of-a-kind but it was still very obvious who would win this fight.

Or was it?

And just like that, in good ole' Zelda game fashion, I went from underdog to top chef as I took my grasshopper mixed with monster horn elixir. I gulped it down, pretending it tasted delicious. I felt my luck skyrocket. This would be the moment, this is it, I was going to win!

And then, the river.

It was the Ace of spades.

Apparently my cooking skills still lack. Zelda bowed her head in defeat, we had lost Hyrule in a poker match against Ganon.

You know, it wasn't what I expected but I had a good time. But not everyone is so forgiving.

One player, who wishes to remain anonymous, described the experience as "like being stuck in a never-ending episode of Celebrity Poker Showdown, only less entertaining." Others have taken to social media to express their disappointment, with one user tweeting, "I thought I was playing a Zelda game, not a World Series of Poker simulator."

Despite the backlash, the developers of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom remain steadfast in their commitment to this new direction. In a recent interview, lead designer Tomoko Maruyama defended the game's design, stating, "We wanted to challenge players in a way they've never been challenged before. And what's more challenging than poker?"

Sources