She's Just a Gamer Girl

Y'all it's sometimes a weird thing to admit you are a girl in a gamer world. I'm sure it's been said a thousand times over but sometimes you get a lot of feedback about it.

"No way, for real." Nod.

"But you're like good." Gee thanks.

Usually after you admit to the fact that you are a girl, and that you are actually decent at said game. People have a stereotype that they have set up when they think of gamer. Gamers come in all shapes, sizes and genders! It's the one place you can be whoever you want to be! You can't force yourself to play something you aren't feeling, or one that is the most popular at the time.

My ex introduced me to World of Warcraft back in 2006 when we first started dating and all I thought was, 'oh my God, it's so pretty.' Yes that was my first feeling, I couldn't tell you how excited my creative brain was looking at all the pretty aesthetics of this (at the time) popular game. Now I'm not sure of the current player statistics, it's still popular, it's still kicking...it's 2021. How can they do this? How can Blizzard keep a game kicking that it's still drawing people in? I mean they have reinvented most of their classic games, not only World of Warcraft (WoW) but also Diablo and then adding to the more popular shooters and throwing Overwatch into the mix. There is literally something for everyone!

There is something about WoW that keeps me coming back for more, it's the characters, it's the customizing...I don't raid (momma don't got time for that). I have more level 60's than the average player because I have become an efficient leveler, I even have doubles of some because I mean Horde and Alliance. I love doing dungeons of old as well as new, I love farming mounts and reagents, it's mind numbing for my overactive brain.

"Sorry I can't run another, I gotta get my kids to bed." That's right, no matter what, they are always my number one priority. I love gaming but I also love being present for my kids, now that they are older it's fun to show them what I enjoy doing and as much as I love being my characters, I'm a mom first.

As a mother, as a partner, as a current stay at home person with ADHD...it helps me relax and immerse myself into an artificial world. Escapism can be dangerous, people frequently tell gamers to get your head in the real world. Well that doesn't make me a better person, how am I able to unwind if I can't take a breath every now again and visit my alter egos. The badass characters that I know I will never be (I'm not going to start shapeshifting anytime soon). Why do people read books? Why do people write? Even escape into drugs? Gaming in moderation is definitely not harmful for the most part. (I understand this can be an arguable point but we aren't going to address it in this piece).

Now I do delve into other gaming worlds and not to sound like 'such a girl' but I like games that are pretty (ie: I also play Fortnite). Sometimes an aesthetic alone sells me, I enjoy the cartoony worlds that they have created, I am not big of first person shooters or real life looking games. I am most certainly a person that would head to the transmogrifier (or the item shop) to make sure my characters look good, or suit my personality.

For instance, my main is a Night Elf Druid, classic I know. Well she's been around since original World of Warcraft (what the majority like to call vanilla WoW). She's seen the world, quite literally, as I kept playing through the expansions I aged her, she aged with each game and her style varied per my mood and also with the style of the time. I was so excited when they added more customizable styles, from hair styles, to color, to picking out the perfect wardrobe (without sacrificing any stats). She has healed, done some amazing kitty damage, tanked like a champ (my current spec) and even boomed all the way back to Stormwind.

My first job working back in Circuit City (way back in the day), all the guys in my department would tell me that a druid would be the type of character I would play. What they knew of me and the class just suited me I guess, I think about those comments from all those hardcore nerds now and just laugh and know deep down they were totally right! Here I am 15 years later still playing the same character. I like to embody her a lot, I enjoy the druid feel, the one with Earth and all the hippy feels I get from thinking about her. That vibe is strong in my soul, my inner druid calling me. Maybe as a woman it's a power trip to think about all these characters that you play and kick ass with. I mean why do people cosplay? You get to embody a character, you get to feel more badass than maybe you have ever felt. Probably the same reason really good actors enjoy their job so much, or enjoy portraying characters that are so diverse. It's another element of your passion that bring these characters to life.

Now I know you are thinking, "WoW really? You still play that lame game?" Yes. Yes I do and let me tell you why...again. It's comfort, the same way people get comfort from watching the same TV shows, or movies, or rereading the same books when we are in a funk. It's all about comfort when we are out of sorts. For me the massive amount of different characters and classes help curb my ADHD and the questing or dungeons are monotonous enough to offer me a little comfort.

Each character I have is a little piece of me, it's little pieces of me that are on an adventure, or trying to solve puzzles. I customize each one to perfection (in my eyes) to represent a little bit of me. From wild hair with battle scars (druid), feeling like I can take on the world (paladin), to stealthy perfection (rogue). As I said there is a class for everyone and I've got a character for every occasion.

Maybe before passing judgement on a girl that says she's a gamer (because we know it happens) take into consideration all the reasons she might be gaming. We now get to see girl streamers on YouTube or Twitch, I love seeing all of them, and they play all sorts of different games! Just because she's a girl doesn't mean she doesn't like to kick some ass and take some names.

Being a woman in a male dominated world (even virtual) can be intimidating. This wasn't meant to be a sexism piece but it is so much easier to be a bully when you hide behind a screen or a remote. When all the bullying can take place without face to face interaction. The few times I would create a male character (just because why not and per my son's request when he was a toddler) that I ended up being treated very differently while grouped with others.

"Thanks bro," yeah no prob man.

"Hey come do this quest with me," nah I'm good man.

The funny thing is, when I would reject an invitation sometimes it would be taken personally, 'oh our guild isn't good enough for you?' I didn't say anything I just don't want a guild currently. Sounds strangely like real life dating does it not?

Yet how many times do men play female characters (because sometimes they are prettier to look at when gallivanting around the world) and you'd be virtually flirted with? So it happens on both sides and you learn to take it with a grain of salt. /flirt is so old.

Aside from the little bit of sexism you deal with, there are also frustrations with players who are impatient, players who think you are trash just because you don't use certain spells or use certain addons. This is basic damn manners while in a virtual world...or any world! I have now learned to be a mother in game, and if there is one thing real motherhood has taught me it's patience. I give my group the benefit of the doubt, if the first couple pulls are a struggle I explain the pulls a little more, if the player is truly bad I will try to offer suggestions. We were all there at one point or another in our gaming lives. We are never professional when we log into something the first time, it takes practice and fine tuning. So I guess you can say I love fine tuning my characters not necessarily for end game raid but more end game dungeon and questing and class development.

If there is one thing I would share with the WoW community is the same thing I'd share with the real world, be nice. Maybe it's the mom part of me, maybe it's the woman part of me, maybe it's just basic manners from my age group but stop being gaming assholes! Being a bully doesn't make you any better at the game, it just makes me laugh at the fact that you are being so petty about trivial matters. These are the people that if you stand in the bad stuff, I'm not going to heal your ass for being an idiot.

A personal favorite quote: "I can't heal stupid."

Guess what y'all? I love gaming and I believe I will always love gaming. There is something in the back of my mind that says, "this is your jam." I wholeheartedly believe this! I am the generation that had; Nintendo (of all kinds), Sega, PlayStation (sorry Xbox users), and PC. You can call me a geek or a nerd and that is totally fine with me, can't argue with who you are at heart.

Hi, my name is Karli and I'm a gamer girl. :p

**All photos are screenshots of my own characters**