Mass Effect - the game that changed me
I don't even make that many choices in real life
Video games have always been a part of my life. I loved playing them. Of course, the first thing that I wanted was just getting pleasure from it. But then I came across the game called Mass Effect...and so the things began.
It is the story of how Shepard's difficult choices taught me how to make decisions, learned to be a perfectionist, and led to the creation of a family. So let’s go ahead with it.
How did everything start?
I started playing in 1999, at the age of 5. My very first game was Star Wars: Dark Forces. I was terribly afraid of enemies and, to my shame, never finished even the first level of this game. But it didn't change me, like the hundreds of games that I played after.
There was only one exception that really changed my views on games, life, irretrievability, and the obligatory choice. I was so strongly influenced by the first Mass Effect, or rather, only one episode - Virmire, assault, and subsequent destruction of the base. This moment made a lasting impression on me.
To understand why this is the case, you need to go back a little bit in time. In 2001, we bought a computer and with it appeared games - Diablo, StarCraft and Hidden and Dangerous. Soon other names - Max Payne, GTA 3, Neverwinter Nights - joined the list. Around 2005, I started hanging out in front of the computer, allocating 4-5 hours a day to games.
My passion was global strategies, especially Rome: Total War and RPG - already mentioned Neverwinter Nights and its sequel, Baldur's Gate, Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic, and many others now ranked among the classics of the genre. In these games, it was important for me to become a hero, a real one. To help the poor, to save the oppressed, to bring back prosperity and all that. Youth maximalism is mixed with perfectionism.
As a fan of Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic, I couldn't miss BioWare's new space RPG, even though I was very late. After the new year, I found a part-time job and spent the first salary just on Mass Effect. Shepard's adventures took me a month, if not more.
The role of Mass Effect
As before, Shepard was an exemplary hero. Save and spare all people. You're the corpse of your wife, you're dissuaded from a criminal career, and you're being stripped of your inclinations to racism and discrimination. In general, for the completeness of the picture is not enough only a full-length portrait of Shepard with a halo on his head, and surrounded by all the saints.
Virmire started with the same passion. I calmed Wrex and kept him alive, the Salarian military helped as much as I could. The conversation with Asari in the laboratory also went without the blue-skinned brains splashed on the wall.
I need to sacrifice a member of the team. And it can't be changed in any way. Whatever I did throughout the game, no matter how aptly and quickly I shot the tracked Saren so that I did not speak Normandy and everyone I meet - all this did not allow to avoid the victim.
A few hours after the explosion, I spent thinking. It was obvious that someone had to be left behind. The choice was irreversible and all that could be done was to accept the consequences and continue to do the task. These thoughts led me to other conclusions.
The choice must be made and quickly. There's no point in regretting the past. Any decision can and will most likely have negative consequences, so you need to choose not the lesser of evils, but more of the good. And then there's the inevitability of mistakes and losses. It's not that I've never been upset with plans before, but for some reason, it's this choice that has opened my eyes.
I stopped downloading games if something went wrong. They played with new colors and emotions, the opportunity to make a mistake really scared. In addition to the games, the changes have affected my life. A year and a half later, in my first year, I decided to drop out of university.
Two years ago I gave up my hobby (sold a record player and vinyl records, as well as a game computer) to help my wife. All these decisions I made quickly, without wasting time to regret what I had done in advance. I just put up with the losses and went on.
I can't say that Mass Effect has changed me. It's not that. But the explosion at Virmire pushed me to rethink choice and loss. It was from that moment that I began to go to one of the principles in my life - "loss is inevitable, you can only accept them and continue."