The Apocalypse Will Be Great
A little more chaos, a lot less taxes. What's not to love?
Apocalypse. The end of all times.
It's dramatic, it's fun. No more stifling rules of society, just you, the road and possibly a horde of zombies.
Humanity has been obsessed with the idea of the End of The World, since, well the beginning of the world. The inevitability of our own deaths feeding into a curiosity about how not just us at an individual scale, but everything would end.
The Vikings had Ragnarok, Christians beware the Antichrist, The Aztecs were ready for everything to end in 2012 and it's hard to find a teenager who doesn't already have a plan to survive the zombie apocalypse.
From ancient religions to modern day video games the end of all time is something that humans often wonder about.
But for something we think about so often, something entrenched in our subconscious to forever haunt us.
We're really, REALLY afraid of the idea of an apocalypse.
Now, not to sound like a grandfather chastising his grandchildren and telling them stories of his 10 mile trek to school every morning, but humanity is just too damn soft.
The creature comforts of the modern decade have made us unable to adapt. Humanity enjoys the ease of life, with its flashy technology and myriad of creature comforts. In this new world we have forgotten not only the difficulty of survival but what it means to be human.
The apocalypse, end of all times, is really just a blown up version of our own personal ends. Of death. But humans have begun to pull away from this idea. Technology in particular rips us from our natural states of existence and fills our lives with bright flashy lights to distract us from the fullness of our lives and their inevitable end. The topic of death and as an extension of that the end of the world is not one easily accepted by generations of humans hiding away from existence. An apocalypse would rudely shake us from our easy lives and thrust us into a wild scrabble for survival, we would have no choice but to join in with the adventure as everything burns.
As someone suffering from the boring slog of everyday work, a new slew of emails every morning and annoying co-workers whose opinions on pineapple on pizza you have to pretend to care about I welcome an apocalypse with open arms. And this willingness to tear away from society and its rules isn't a new one.
Picture this, its 2012 and pubscent me, is fresh out of an odd obsession with the Aztecs. An obsession very worrying to my peace loving parents who don't quite enjoy the idea of ripping out hearts of people for ritual sacrifice to the sun god as much as I do. Teenage me is completely prepared for the upcoming apocalypse. If everything was going to end I was going to make sure that I would go in style.
Then the 21st of December 2012 passes, and the world, disappointingly, is still here. All I had now was a useless, long list of things to do as everything burned and an even longer list of people who I had not yet bought Christmas presents for.
But ever the optimist, I was sure that the next time round I'd be even better prepared for the end of times. And in the meantime I could find 'my crew'. My group of people to party through the apocalypse with.
Never have I set myself up for more disappointment. The disappointment I felt failing to find people of my own kind, people willing to live loudly and die brightly, was more than the disappointment my parents felt watching me grow up. When it comes to apocalypse prepping there are only two types of people. Those who don't want to think about it and those who are unnaturally obsessed with survival.
Both parties are missing out on the true joy of the apocalypse.
The fall of everything. And amongst it, only you and your crew.
As the world collapses around you, there are no rules, no laws. Just you and pure free will. Humans at their purest with nothing to dictate their actions but themselves.
Despite being the death of everyone and everything, it would be the first time some of us have truly lived. A post-apocalyptic world, with no technology, no office jobs, none of the mundaneness of modern day life.
Ironically, the end of times would be when we live at our fullest. The fear of death has always brought humans to do great things, in a lawless world where death is a constant we would be at our brightest. Brilliant fireworks lighting up the sky before disappearing forever into the dark, rather than steady, soft flames. Sitting quietly atop a lavender scented candle in yet another office cubicle.
Of course I could be wrong, but you can’t prove me wrong until everything ends.
So when the End Of Times arrives I’ll be prepared and I hope you'll join me in waiting for the adventure that is the End.
Chaos will reign, the world will end and throughout it all I have only one goal. To live fiercely and die stylishly.
For now, however, you can find me huddled in my blanket, scrolling through Instagram, waiting for my leather jacket to come through the mail, armed with a bottle of bug spray for the spider I swear I saw crawl into my room.