Greener, Cleaner, Meaner

The readout on the digicurrency display in the mall restroom stall played a happy little diddy. Soft and curly animated poo characters gleefully danced as they sung a cute little song in gratitude to her service to a greener, cleaner environment.

Yeon-woo was taken aback by the amount. She didn't realize solid human waste could be worth so much. What a brilliant new economy this was going to be. She smiled as she touched her digital wallet to the readout to collect.

The readout beeped again. And twice more. Each time subtracting an amount – toilet paper usage, water usage, time in stall – until the readout glowed with a negative amount. The characters halted their celebration and scowled at Yeon-woo. Eying her, they postured and mumbled, spitting phrases she didn't quite catch and was quite sure she didn't want to. They demanded that she pay the negative amount but she didn't have anything on her wallet. She'd just bought it. She hadn't thought she would need to put anything on it. She was just going to use it to collect "poop payments".

Finished, she stood, figuring to go make amends with mall management. Undoubtedly, there were still a few wrinkles to be ironed out of the system.

The door made a loud clicking sound. She had, of course, locked it when she came in. Were they throwing her out? Unlocking the door before she was finished? Public humiliation in a shopping mall? That seemed a little uncalled for. She was definitely going to have a word with someone now!

Pushing on the full-length door, she found it hadn't been unlocked at all. She turned the handle. It wouldn't budge. She pulled. Pushed. Turned the lock several times both ways. Nothing worked. It was impossible to open the door.

It was double-locked!

Banging loudly, she called out to try and get the attention of another facility visitor. "Hello? Hello. If there's anyone there, I could use a little assistance."

No reply. It was possible she would have to wait a few minutes until someone else came in. Calming herself, she took a deep breath and started listening for approaching footfalls.

A silence so heavy fell over the restroom that Yeon-woo could hear her own heart pounding as she waited. Never in her life had she experienced a space so quiet. Any other time, the facilities would have been practically swamped with queued women.

A happy beep from the stall next door startled her to which she then let out a muffled guffaw. Quickly composing herself so as not to offend whomever was there, she called out to the woman. "Sorry. Excuse me. The sound caught me off-guard." She considered how to phrase her plea. "I seem to be stuck. Can you help me?"

As with the readout in Yeon-woo's own stall, there were several more beeps and then the angry threats next door. She looked down at her own readout to see the poo were now dressed like thugs and brandishing knives. They were getting serious. She backed away from their pixelated neon anger. Just in case.

The woman next door didn't deign reply, but raised her voice in complaint instead, "Hey, let me out of here!" The outburst was followed by a furious rattling of the door, banging, and then a blood-curdling scream that sent Yeon-woo stumbling back until she slammed up against the opposite stall wall.

"Hey! What's going on over there?" came a startled voice that was soon distracted by a soft beep. "Oh, how cute!"

From the other stalls throughout the restroom came other happy beeps and other captivated voices. The beeps turned angry and the voices confused and frightened. An echoing crescendo of cries wafted toward the restroom exit only to be drowned out by an ever-so-slight automated increase in the mall-wide muzak system.

END