Every Child Had One

The auctioneer walked up to the microphone and began to speak…….

"Every child had one when I was a kid, every child, and adult had a little black book. It was a notebook, given to every person on their fifth birthday. The cover had your name, your date of birth and your government assigned email address on the front. Inside the front cover was the following statement:

“This book is assigned to you by the Department of Appropriate Language for the purpose of recording the correct designations, pronouns or titles for individuals, groups, organisations and ethnicities that you encounter. In recording these designations and remembering to use them when you communicate verbally with others, you will satisfy the requirements of the “Individual Protective Communications Act of 2024” and therefore you will not be subjected to the consequences of using non-preferred speech as outlined in the ACT. Penalties for refusing to record and use the preferred designations of individuals, groups, organisations and ethnicities can result in fines of up to $10,000 per offence or up to five years in jail for adults, or up to six months in a government education centre for children under the age of 17.”

Government of Australia Canberra 2024

"In 2024 after years of lobbying by humanitarian groups and a hard-fought election campaign, the new government, led by Prime Minister Samantha Sojourn, had passed new laws designed to prevent the verbal trauma that people were suffering in everyday life. Extensive research conducted by the Australian National University had demonstrated that even a micro-offence could lead to a life filled with anxiety and depression for individuals and their communities. The new laws were an attempt to recognise that in a multicultural society like Australia, no one set of words could be defined as acceptable because the severity of the offence caused was defined by the person who experienced it. One word might be offensive to one person but not to another depending on their personal preference. "

"The Individual Protective Communications Act of 2024 said that each person was required to record the preferred pronoun, designation or title of each individual, group, organisation, or ethnicity they encountered. Once it had been recorded, they were obligated to use only those words to describe them, and if someone was offended by the words they used, the fact they had recorded that person’s preference in their little black book, protected them from prosecution for causing a person to experience verbal trauma. "

"When the new laws were first passed it was celebrated as a national triumph. Australia had achieved a world first in legal terms, a law that protected the feelings of each individual, but still allowed them to define how they should be addressed as individuals, as a community, as an organisation or a religious group or as an ethnicity. Other nations began to copy Australia’s world-first initiative. "

"Australian’s being a fairly compliant people took to these new laws like a duck to water. Despite the prevalence of digital technology at the time, a SmartPhone (a small device people used to carry with them to make phone calls or use the internet) or a recording device, was not considered secure enough for the law to be applied effectively, which is why every resident on their fifth birthday was issued with their own government-issued little black notebook. For two years the laws operated without enforcement. This grace period was given to allow all citizens to learn how to use their little black notebook and for citizens to have time to choose their preferred pronouns and designations. "

"For the two-year grace period the laws operated effectively, mistakes were made but Australians slowly got used to recording and using other peoples preferred pronouns. In 2025 the Australian Government began to construct the facilities they would need to enforce this new legal regime. In each state and territory, a live-in youth education facility was constructed where people between the ages of 5-17 could be housed while they received Government approved classes to help them understand the dangers of micro-offences and why obeying these laws was essential to social cohesion. They also constructed 12 new adult jails to prepare for an influx of prisoners in the first few years of the enforcement of the new laws. A new enforcement body was created called the National Protective Speech Agency. Its officers were able to arrest and charge people under the new laws. They were able to conduct a complete physical search to make sure you were carrying your little black book. The department was created as a subset of the Federal Police and to distinguish them from other Police officers they wore a black uniform instead of the traditional blue. "

"On the 25th of January 2026, the Individual Protective Communications Act 2024 became enforceable by law. News reports from the time indicate a celebratory mood still existed in the Australian Community and a few short months later, Prime Minister Sojourn was elected with a huge Parliamentary majority. "

"But over the next couple of years, a movement arose in the Australian Community that called for change. The government had to construct larger education centres for younger and younger children who were separated from their parents for months at a time. At the height of enforcement in 2029, over 280,000 Australian adults and 120,000 children were incarcerated. They were detained for not carrying their little black notebook, for not paying a fine related to the new Act or for a conviction related to the causing of a verbal trauma. "

"In the 2030 election, the Sojourn government was defeated and the new Federation Party under the leadership of Prime Minister Michael Moncrieff won the election. They had promised to repeal the Individual Protective Communications Act and release every person currently detained in an education centre or prison under the Act. "

"On the 25th of October 2030 in towns and cities around Australia communities gathered to set fire to their little black books in an event known as the Great Burn. In the years that followed, the little black books became rarer and rarer as people purged this period of the country’s history from their homes. "

"By 2040 the books had become quite valuable, they were a rare item from a difficult period in Australia’s history and collectors began to buy them, but they had never found one in mint condition, never used. "

"Today I present to you a mint condition little black book. On the cover, you can see the original owner's name, Prime Minister Samantha Sojourn. The book has her government-assigned email address on the front and it is still in its original plastic wrapping. The book was given to her Chief of Staff Jason Potter as a gift on the 25th of January 2024 to celebrate the first day of operation of the Individual Protective Communications Act. "

"Jason Potter handed it down to his son William Potter who is auctioning it off to the highest bidder today. So, let's open the bidding at $500, do I have $500? Yes up the back, thanks. Do I have $1000? Yes, I have $1000 down the front, what was that sir, your bid is $10000? That’s a new record for a little black book! Do I have $15000? yes thank you, sir, $15,000, do I have 16, 16? Thank You that’s $16000, 17, 17? Yes, $18000? Thankyou mam, anyone for $19000, no one? Ok going once, going twice, that’s a bid in the middle row for - what sir? $20,000, any more bids? Going once, going twice, sold to the gentleman in the middle row for $20,000. "

William Potter, while very surprised at the large sale price, smiled to himself and left the room. His father had been Chief of Staff to the most socialist Prime Minister in Australian history, but at least he had left his son something……..