The Sexual Incarnations of Madonna

In his book Gatecrasher, gossip columnist Ben Widdicombe described Madonna as a near-perfect interview. She knows how to give the media, concisely and efficiently, precisely what they need to get a good story. He said other stars would try to be kind, aloof, or thoughtful. But Madonna was a rare breed who knew precisely the image she wanted to put out and the messages that would convey it. He said his interactions with Madonna were always brief but gave him precisely what he needed for a good story.

I recently watched a Madonna documentary. It wasn't well done — relying mainly on interviews with the paparazzi rather than with the star or anyone who knew her — but it was an exciting walk through the different stages of her career. While it wasn't personal, as far as documentaries go, it did leave me with the overwhelming impression that I got to know Madonna well. Mainly because Madonna — love her or hate her — seems an unbelievably transparent woman. When you see Madonna, you are seeing Madonna. She loves to be adored. She's strident as Hell, in herself and her sexuality. She is unafraid of change but always on her terms. She has no shame in who she is and lets that persona come through. And the public, we could take it or leave it.

As someone very interested in sexuality, it was interesting to see how her sexuality evolved. At the beginning of her career, she was what I would call packaged sexuality. It was sincere… you could tell she was a sexual person. But in her music videos and her interviews, you could tell she was rolling out that sexuality in a way that was meant to be teasing and enticing. But a little aloof. She wanted her sexuality to be on display but packaged in a very deliberate way. So she was both putting it out there and holding it back at the same time.

As she got a little older, she got bolder. Her erotica album was nothing but a sexual expression. The music seemed to matter less than the eroticism. Or, more accurately, the music was eroticism. She went from being a singer who was sexy to an erotic being who sang. And it felt like this was not a gimmick. It thought that this was indeed who she was. She had always embraced the material girl image. She was about all of the fantastic and indulgent things that came with fame and success. And owning and embracing her sexuality was a huge part of that.

And then came her book — Sex. In that book, there was no grey. Madonna became a metaphor for sex. As her career was cresting, she felt her sexuality could crest in tandem. It felt so honest. I remember seeing the book and the time and not thinking much of it. I like it more now because I feel it was such an open and transparent act. It was sexy and raw. And not always in a commercially intelligent way. It was just sexy, even if some of these images were a little imperfect or jarring.

As Madonna has aged, parented, and diversified, I still love how confident she is in whoever she wants to be in the moment. And it brings me back to that observation from Widdicombe. She must be a dream to interview because she is 100% confident in who she is and what she wants to convey to the public. In this age of insecurity, you have to respect that. I certainly do - but maybe that's because I find her sexy as Hell.