I think the heteronormative consensus is that us gaybies are just given birth to one day and in our first few moments of consciousness it’s then that we realize how truly queer we are. And I wish, I truly WISH it was that simple, and for someone, somewhere, on some planet far far away it might be. But when it comes to me... and pretty much every other person within the LGBTQIA community that I have ever known it was not and is not that easy.
These days there are so many labels for sexual and romantic identity that it's hard to keep track of them all. And that's before we start combining them together in different ways.
London was a little nervous to get a visit from his future mate. He had no idea what the man even looked like. He had already shifted into a dinosaur by the time London and the others had entered the fighting circle. London wondered what the man's human body looked like, assuming his mate was a man. London didn't know what he would do if his mate turned out to be a woman. He had nothing against woman; they were pretty enough. But, like his brothers, he needed cock and balls to be turned on sexually.
Being bisexual in a world that deems anything different from the norm to be deviant, is an act of valiance in today’s society. The LGBTQ movement has come a long way since its inception in the late 80s.
A muggy Florida night on a candle-lit porch accompanied by my straight-married-roommates and a heavily rolled spliff is what sparked (no pun intended) this conversation... Every single person on this planet has questions that need answers. Many do not ask because they think their questions are dumb, insignificant, or just plain rude. The following is a Q&A with my beautiful Fiancé Adreana and our roommates Evelyn & Martin:
"Suck my dick!" It's a request that is all over Grindr. What is supposed to be a gay... err... "dating" app has been overtaken by men who identify as straight. It led me to question: Why are men who claim to like women, on a dating app that is designed for homosexual men to meet each other in a safe space. There were several answers that were enlightening and inspired a new erotic novel.
I want to start this out by stating that I have never been good at writing about myself and my experiences; last year around the same time, I wrote about my catfish story which I didn’t even proofread. It was a hot mess so I’m sorry if you stumbled upon it! In that story I touch base on my sexuality and how crystal clear I was about it and my experiences with it. However, I've found that it's important to let it out somehow and as a writing student I think I've found the best way. I hope this story makes sense and I hope someone out there finds it useful in some way!
When I was growing up I always felt different then everyone else I went to school with. I never knew what it was. But as I grew older I was wondering why I was staring a little bit too long at the girls in the locker room getting ready for gym class and why I was obsessing over the girl who was two years older than me who had no idea who I was. I remember one day when I was in eighth grade there was this girl who was very open about her sexuality and she asked another girl if she wanted to kiss her. I was so uncomfortable and when my mom came to pick me up I told her what was going on and she asked how I felt about it. I told her that I was interested and that I was scared to say that I was attracted to the same sex. She told me it was OK but I shouldn’t tell my dad. (By the way, my first kiss was my best friend in elementary school). I learned about Pornhub when I was fourteen and the first category I clicked on was ‘lesbians’. I thought that was completely normal and that all girls probably watch this category. I guess I was wrong. I tried watching male and female porn but it was just not as intriguing.
Jean was standing around the corner from the coffee shop, just out of sight. The cold from the brick wall she was leaning against had begun to creep through her brown woolen coat. She had been standing here for at least twenty minutes. The events of yesterday still swirled in her head. She wasn’t sure what to do, so there she stood.
“My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...” Kelis croon-brags on her iconic song, “Milkshake.” While she certainly isn’t using the lyrics to advocate for pedophilia, they certainly can be examined that way. This process lead me to declare that only men are allowed to experience my milkshake. Men rolled their eyes saying, "that was the implication," but females were a tad more concerned about the meaning of the song. It also started a conversation about age and relationships.
Jean never thought she would be doing something like this. She had never even kissed a girl before. And now here she was, being pulled along by her hand, to this girl's apartment. And she had only known her from random conversations at the coffee shop that they both frequented.
This is a recount of my own journey. It is simply to share my personal experiences over the past year. My story will not line up with that of everyone. Remember, you know your own sexuality best and you are unique. I am not claiming to represent anyone. However, I hope perhaps what I have been through will resonate with someone who reads this. If you are struggling with your sexuality and are seeking some support, I have included links to organizations that can help at the end of this article.