Filthy logo

Naked Nuns Get Shit Done

by Roscoe Forthright 2 years ago in politics
Report Story

If political leaders were normal humans...

I really cannot keep my mouth shut about the nonsense we are calling a Presidential Election. There are many, more pleasant and helpful ways to run our national propaganda campaigns, which would most likely deliver results equal to, or surpassing whatever our current results turn out to be.

If political leaders were normal humans we might expect them to enjoy their sexuality.... you know, like the campaign ads in Georgia~~ The director of a Public Service Announcement featuring Atlanta-based exotic dancers took to Twitter on Tuesday to defend the ad, which was aimed at increasing voter turnout among “the black male demographic,” according to the ad's website.

Apparently, Nancy Pelosi doing a pole-dance, or even Ms. Ocasio-Cortez would not draw in the boys like those black girls from Altanta! So this is the best our democratic process can imagine? In the 1980s when Brazilian politicians had more sense of humor, they often included strippers at their rallies. I remember seeing the new Brazilian President on TV with his girl-friend, and she wore a bikini top, with no panties. She waved and smiled to a crowd of thousands, and shook her firm, naked fanny.

Honestly, this whole recent Presidential nonsense of rallies and debates would be more fun with a few pretty naked females.

For example, if The Little Sisters of Divine Grace (pictured below) created a 30-second independent ad for Joe Biden, the elderly gentlemen would rank far better among the younger male demographic. They might say things like, “Our good friend, Joe Biden, carries a rosary in his pocket and attends Mass every Sunday. He is known as a deeply devout person of faith, and his campaign sees electoral implications in that — in part because Biden has tried to frame this election as a clear moral contrast between Trump and himself. Joe Biden is your moral choice for President of the United States!”

The Little Sisters of Divine Grace

If The Little Sisters of Divine Grace chose to back Donald Trump, they would use factual statistics: “Arguably the biggest religion story of Trump’s presidency is how he won his first election: by winning 80-81% of white evangelicals who turned out on Election Day 2016. Clearly our Evangelical non-Catholic White Brothers and Sisters appreciate a man who appreciates a nice piece-of-ass.” ~ Or, perhaps they would replace “piece-of-ass” with, “a man who appreciates attractive and successful women.”

But we must separate Religion from Politics. The Vatican would never approve of naked nuns on TV, or at rallies, or on social media, regardless of their noble intentions. It is quite likely the Vatican would defrock the disrobed nuns, and kick them out of Catholicism entirely! They do not want their demure, consecrated virgins appearing in videos, and being spanked with red-riding crops, even when the girls provide a scriptural basis for those spankings. [The newly discovered Book of Heggai, found on clay tablets in the bombed out city is Mosul, Iraq, has specific references to ritual spanking: “As decreed by the Elders of Judah, thou shalt spank the bad little girls. Spank. Spank. Spank.”]

It is not likely that particular passage will make it into any modern edition of the Holy Bible. Even the Mormon version would never do that far. Heretics like myself make the matter so much worse, simply by imagining a world of new possibilities, as I have done above. If I can imagine such things--- who else will start imagining such things?! This could cause a lot of trouble for everybody!! The whole problem with heretics is their ability to imagine possibilities the people in charge do not like. To image a thing, then to say it, then to get other people thinking those ideas are not half-bad, and might make the world a better place--- well, that causes trouble on so many levels it gives the powerful people fits of vertigo, and they need to take more meds.

politics

About the author

Roscoe Forthright

Erotic filmmaker and novelist. I use x-rated heterosexual short films as a tool for spiritual enlightenment. Laugh all you want. This actually works for many people. Fucking is universal! And very popular!

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2022 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.