A Time Before

A TIME BEFORE

It was awhile ago

A time before

A moment then that was now

I had longed for the look of a stranger’s glance

Someone new, different, someone not like me

To stimulate a part of me that had fallen to sleep

What had been a gentle slumber was now wrestling in the restlessness of complacency

I never thought that the stranger would be someone I knew so well.

It was the eyes, I think.

Maybe the hands

Maybe something in the voice

That said more than words

Or was it the cadence of the speech

That reminded me so much of the well tempered Prelude in C

The beginning of a continuation

Falling into you was simple, easy and at times ecstatic

The first touch

That was the moment when I knew

That life, with its ease and stability

Life, with an endless array of sunshine and smiles

Life, as an experience of peace would end.

Life would be different now.

By the power of our touch

Life became full of insanity and devastation

I craved you

The madness of the intoxication of your smell drove me to foodless days

I needed nothing but your touch

It was desire that led to darkness

Even as I clawed through emotional quicksand scrambling to hold onto a life I used to know.

We walked slowly, deliberately towards my bedroom

I was pulled at once to go forward and to runaway

You ushered me

As if you knew the way

As if my bedroom was your domain

Your space

In your well tempered voice you said

“I just want to hold you,

Feel your skin on my skin

Nothing more”

My mind knew it was a lie

My heart did too

My soul laughed

As we laid next to each other skin touching skin

My soul laughed louder

When you leaned in to kiss first my hair, then my forehead

My soul roared in hysterics

Your lips descended gently across the aspects of my face

Pausing forever at my lips

Then your lips discretely caressed the length of my neck

Until I felt your tongue dive gently between my breasts

My mind wondered which breast you would suckle first

My heart relaxed, feeling safe in the warmth of our mutual fire

My soul rolled her eyes

The only touching part

She always knew was a lie

But she had over time forgotten

The simple honesty of lips

She was now remembering

You cupped my left breast in your right hand

Then gently but firmly squeezed my nipple

You watched as my lips parted with a sigh

A groan of pleasure and pain

Then subtlety you kissed

Suckled and kneaded my right breast

Then the left

From one to the other

Continually

For what felt like timelessness

A gentle shift and you were running your tongue

Across my belly

My hips joined in the conversation with my heart and mind

Causing a gentle rhythm to envelope my body

My soul surrendered her cynicism

Your lips brushed across my sacred space

Not stopping

Your continued down the length of my thighs

Caressing my knees

Massaging my calves

Kissing the instep of each foot

While softly tickling and caressing each toe

My mind felt complete

The shell of my heart cracked

My soul fought to drift back to a time

A time before our first touch

Before life as we knew it changed

But it was too late

My hips summoned you from where you were

And I died as your lips touched

And then drank the sacred honey

From my overflowing cup