You Feel like Forever

I stared at Argent’s curled up form, his long pale back was to me, and sweat was running off him. He was also completely nude, good god the guy was tall.

Not what I had expected to see when Jesse had come by the hotel where my mom, son and I were all staying. He had pleaded with me to come see Argent and said that he really needed to see me. Jesse apparently knew all about our little bump in the road and knew that Argent was too proud to come and see me but that he knew if Argent and I talked it out we could resolve this.

So, I went with him. We ended up at a mansion in California's richer neighborhood, before I could protest Jesse had whisked me inside and to the fortified room, I was currently in.

I froze when I saw what was inside and he had taken the opportunity to shut me inside and slam the door. It sounded like one of those bank vault locks as he spun whatever it was that had me locked in with what looked like an extremely sick or hurt Argent.

“Argent?”

He was panting and groaning. I came over to him and knelt down to brush his longish silvery hair out of his face, it stuck to him, and it looked like he was getting hairier as I watched.

The room was dark so maybe I was just imagining it. I did not imagine that Argent was boiling hot to the touch. Oh no, he was very sick, he needed a hospital!

“Jesse!! Argent is sick!! Call 911! Please get me ice, lots of ice, he’s burning up!” I yelled through the door. Whatever weirdness Jesse was playing at, this was serious. With a fever like this, He could end up with brain damage.

Jesse’s laughter greeted me from the other side of the door “Sorry babe, not going to happen. Besides, those won't help him anyway. You won't be too concerned about his health in a few minutes anyway.” His laughter had taken on a slightly unhinged quality, and I started to feel very worried for my mother and my son. I needed to keep him here so he could focus on me.

Figures, I thought to myself, Jesse was absolutely gorgeous. Trust fund kid, blonde haired and blue eyes, tall with a permanent tan and muscles for days. He had asked me out after Argent & I had already begun whatever this was between us. I had said no because I wanted to focus on what this was between Argent and I; I had never experienced such a powerful and instantaneous connection with anyone in my life, well outside of the day that my son Neal was born.

Needless to say, Jesse had kept asking and I had kept turning him down, politely. Finally explaining that I wanted to show Argent the respect that I would want. He had seemed to understand that….apparently not.

Argent groaned again and brought me right back to the present, he raised one of his long-fingered hand to brush my face “Sam, what are you doing here?” He sounded so miserable.

I frowned, no point being mad at him now. I could be mad all I wanted once we got out of here and got him to a hospital. Things had been going in a good direction the other night. It was the most intense make out session I ever had in my life, when he had pulled away…hard. He had driven me home fast and practically dumped me out at my hotel.He had muttered a goodbye and sped off, leaving me wondering what I had done, and my questions turned to hurt as he refused to answer my texts and calls. I was still pretty steamed, but I didn't want to see him suffer….much.

“Your pal Jesse said you desperately wanted to see me; guess I should have figured that was a huge fib hunh? I turned away from him and stared at the door. The room seemed devoid of any other exit. Why would Argent have a room like this...in his high-end mansion?

Apparently, I was under a few misconceptions. I had thought that Argent was a nice older guy who did a lot of volunteering at the local youth shelters to help and pass the time that he had mountains of since he retired.

The age gap between us was one of the big hurdles for me once Argent had asked me out, but I couldn't deny how I felt about him.

Which made the other night sting even worse, I felt incredibly foolish right now. I had quite a bit of pride.

It was the only way that I had gotten through the rough shake’s life had thrown me. I had built myself up after my business partner had run off and left me in debt, after Neal’s father disappeared leaving me in even more debt, overhauling my life and fighting for Neal & I’s life to be better.

I had done it all through sheer willpower, And I would be damned if I let some trust fund jackass ruin what I had worked so hard for or cheat me out of even 1 second of what I wanted.

Argent's pupils were tiny dark specks in the blue circles of his irises “Jesse… he... brought... you... here?” He ground out the words.

“Yeah, do you know where you are and if so, do you know a way out of here besides that door?” I pointed to the heavy steel door. I hated to push him, but I needed to get us out of here.

Argent bellowed...it almost sounded like a wolf howl; how did a human make that kind of noise “Jesse! Let her out of here!” I pulled back from Argent, stunned. What was that?

“Sam , you need to leave. Get away from me... please, I will explain everything later. I'm so sorry that you had to see me like this.” Argent looked so pitiful now, he was still sweating buckets and it was running into his eyes.

I pulled my t-shirt off and started mopping the sweat out of his eyes. He tried to push me away but just wasn't in any shape to “Tell me what's wrong” I frowned and shook my head. My t-shirt was soaked very quickly.

He groaned and twitched, then full on convulsed, twisting himself outward and upwards. It subsided and he lay there on the concrete floor , panting and looking miserable “You need to leave Sam, please!” He was begging me to leave him. What the hell was going on?

I sighed “Fine, but in case you haven't noticed we are locked in this room. Is there another way out?”

“No.” Argent looked even more miserable. “Jesse!” He bellow/howled again

I heard a hatch open at the top of the room, a good twelve feet above us “Oh sorry, you have an amazing selection of booze Argent, I decided to help myself. I'm surprised you're holding on like this.God that looks painful!” Jesse’s smug face peered down at us, drink in his hand.

“Get her out of here! “ Argent howled. His voice was starting to change, it sounded more guttural. As I watched his body started to lengthen and I could have sworn the bones were clicking and changing shape. What the hell was happening here! What had I gotten myself into?

“No can-do Old Man! You wanted to play the villain of this story so Im gonna help your backstory along. Your goin to jail for ripping Author Samara Hargraves, an innocent single mother, into bloody little pieces. Maybe… you’ll rape her first… perhaps, you’ll eat pieces of her body, who knows? One thing I do know, you and your buddy Jim will NEVER be able to touch our territory again after this. Jim’s a loser, and without you he is easy to deal with.” Jesse’s smile was horrifying, he lifted his glass in a mock salute.

Argent looked pissed. “You get your ass down here and get her out of here, and you had better pray that I dont tear YOU to pieces!!” He stood then, his body shifting and rippling as the moonlight from the open hatch played over him.

In a different setting, this would have been hot as hell, right now I was getting scared. My thoughts kept returning to Neal, why oh why had I come here tonight. I promised myself that if I got out of here, I would never date again, jesus!

“Unh Unh” Jesse produced a long-nosed silver pistol, it looked like it had a silencer on it, and waggled it at Argent.

Argent growled and as I watched, thick silver hair grew down his hips and legs which were shifting into what looked like a dog's hind legs. His feet had lengthened and changed size and shape, becoming very large paws?!!!!

I wanted to scramble back, that would have been smart, but I was too stunned and fascinated at the same time. I knew ghosts and all sorts of metaphysical and paranormal beings existed, that is why I wrote what I did. I was out here doing book signings for my latest supernatural mystery series for Christ sakes.

I'm a psychic empath who regularly talks to spirit guides, angels, fey, deities and the like. I've dealt with body swapping witches and energy vampires. But I had no idea that Lycanthropy was a real thing, it would explain a lot though! How Argent stayed so slim and fit, how he had boundless energy, how he could play with Neal for hours without breaking a sweat, how he looked so good for his age, how he healed so fast.

Wait, what was the legend? Full moon was when werewolves changed, but I had read somewhere that they started to get weird a few days before the full moon. If I survived this, I would need to ask Argent about it.

Argent continued to growl at Jesse “Darren would never greenlight something like this. We have pack rivalry, but it has never been lethal, and it has NEVER involved an innocent bystander. And Jesse, I am going to kill you.” The last was delivered with enough cold that had it been aimed at me ; my blood would have frozen.

Oh wow, this would make a great book if I survived it all.

“D? He doesn't know anything about this. You're right though, he is a pacifist through and through. He doesn't understand how much trouble you are.” Jesse looked over to me “You Know Sammy, it's too bad you decided on throwing in with this geezer. You would have made a gorgeous Luna, babe.”

Argent growled with enough force to rattle the walls “She is innocent! She has a small child!!”

“Not from what I saw the other night. You almost marked her and she was diggin it. As far as the kid, I'm sure sensible little Sammy has insurance. He has a grandma who loves him, it's more than what I got growing up. He’ll be fine” Jesse took a sip of his drink “Thanks for the drink old man, it will be difficult to kill me from jail , but give it a shot. Now if you will excuse me, I need to go murder D and take over our pack. I hate pacifism! Enjoy your snack old man! I know I would.” He smirked at me and slammed the hatch with a bang right as Argent shifted to full lycanthrope form and jumped for the hatch. He slammed into the hatch lid with a painful sounding thud and fell back onto the concrete.

Argent was tall normally, he stood six foot six, but in his wolf form I estimated he had grown about a foot taller. He picked himself up from the floor, stood and howled. It had an oddly keen quality to it. He undulated his howl up a few octaves and then down a few, then he sat back on his haunches and made steady eye contact with the floor.

I waited for him to pounce on me and murder me for a few ticks, my heart was giving hummingbirds a run for their money right now. Then I realized that he wasn't moving, he was just sitting there, as far away from me as he could, looking utterly pathetic and miserable and if I didn't know better, I would have said ….completely ashamed.

I sat up, I hadn't realized that I had scrambled back onto my butt after all, and cocked my head at him “Argent? “He closed his eyes and turned his head further away, looking for all intent like a dog who had done something particularly naughty. I pulled back and arched an eyebrow “Argent can you hear me? Can you understand me?”

He sighed and turned to face me, his eyes were glowing red and that combined with the fact that I was locked in a room with a huge silvery werewolf on the full moon should have scared the hell out of me and it might have been the shock talking but I felt calm, pulling himself into an indian style sitting position.

"Yes Sam, I can hear you, very well in fact, and yes, I can understand you." His voice came out sounding strangely gravelly, like he was growling out the words.He seemed in full command of his faculties, and calm…. he just looked so unbearably tired.

I paused for a moment " Ummmmm, you seem awfully lucid for a rabid werewolf on the full moon who locks himself in a cage? Is it too soon to hope that you're not going to tear me into shark chum???" I really really didn't want to die right now , though it would be one of the more interesting ways to go I can see it now, I get to the afterlife and their like so how did you die, werewolf, you?- jesus! Well at least life was never boring. Scary, difficult but never boring

"Really Sam?!" His exasperation was palpable and if a werewolf could look judgemental that is the exact look Argent was giving me. "Well?? What would you think?" I put my hands out in a what am I supposed to do gesture. "Fine, I see your point. Even if that was a little hurtful to ask a man that you spent the other night passionately making out with. Very passionately if I recall correctly." He sounded kinda huffy.

"Yeah, the same GUY who went colder than an ice cube on me and couldn't get rid of me fast enough after that passionate makeout session." I replied a touch more tartly than I had intended.

He slumped and did not make eye contact with me, eventually he ran a hand over his face " yes, about that…Im sorry, I didn't mean to be that way with you. But you weren't safe with me, you won't be until the moon passes. I had planned to avoid you until then. I wasn't trying to hurt you Sam, I never would, but you just aren't safe with me right now. And it would kill me if anything happened to you" he sounded truly sorry.

I considered that, it made a lot of sense, but I wasn't letting him off the hook that easily “I assume you are fully transitioned, correct?”

“Thats right”

“I seem to be pretty safe with you right now, you're very lucid at least from what I can observe, and you don't seem to be itching to hurt me…………Were you ever going to tell me?”

He ran a hand over his ...muzzle “No, Maybe, I don't know. This has been happening so fast whatever is going on between us and I don't have any experience with feelings being this intense. So, I don't know what I was going to say to you. I just hoped that I could convince you to give me another chance. And NO, you are most certainly NOT safe with me right now.” He said the last with more resolve than I found comfortable.

“So, were you going to lie to me?” I eyed him.

“I didn't want to, but how was I supposed to explain this? Would you really have believed me?” He stared at me.

It was my turn to sigh “No, No I wouldn't have. Ok fine.” I sounded pouty even to myself and hated it. I crossed my arms over my chest, realizing that I was in a pink bra and cutoff jean shorts and nothing else…my shirt was still soaking wet, and I felt cold and self conscious all at the same time.

I cleared my throat “So you say Im not safe with you, even though we are having a conversation the same way we would if you weren't wolfed out. If you're so very dangerous how come you haven't done anything to me? I mean let’s be real, if you really were intent on hurting me it's not like I could stop you...even as a human I'm pretty sure that you could turn me into fish food without breaking a sweat. What gives?” I lifted my shoulders, and a strange light came into his eyes. Uh oh, I hoped I had not stirred up his predator instincts. Crap! I backed up a little unconsciously.

His head snapped up ”Don't do that.”

“What?”

“Try to get away.”

“Oh ok. Is that a time to kill trigger?” Crap.

He groaned “NO. But it IS going to make me want to chase you. There are 2 basic instincts during this time, both involve hunting and chasing. Please just relax and be still.”

I gave a suspicious look”You are dangerous and keep saying so, but you want me to relax and stay still….seems a little counter intuitive” He smiled “I suppose it does. I am lucid and calm because I am keeping my human consciousness active. The more a wolf turns, and with some dedication and mental discipline…if they try, the quicker their human consciousness can stay intact during any shift. It can also be used to control the shift physically to some ……extent.”

Now that was interesting”Was that what Jesse was talking about , you were holding off the change until he could get me out of here?” He cleared his throat “Yes. Every moment in here with me is a risk for you.”

“It's a risk crossing the street, Argent. But I'm curious if you can wield this much control, why lock yourself in on the full moons?”

He looked a bit chagrined. “I lock myself in here on the full moon because I have PTSD from Vietnam, not because I'm afraid I will hurt anyone. All of my stress responses are heightened and here is dark and quiet. My hearing much better than a human and I can wait out the moon's effects in relative peace”

I was shocked and felt so bad for him. This poor guy was just trying to get some relief from trauma and here I was landing right in the middle of it all” Oh my god, I'm sorry! I wish you had just told me…even if it was about PTSD. I would have given you your space. Oh wow, this has to be terrible for you. And wow! As a side note…just how old ARE you?”

He hung his head “You have no reason to be sorry Sam. had I been more straightforward with you, you wouldn't have gotten mixed up in all of this. And I truly regret you being involved in this…I never meant for you to be put in any kind of danger. I didn't know that Jesse had these kinds of plans, our packs have differences hence the problems…but this was completely out of line.”

Hmm he had skated around the age question “ About the issues between your packs……What's going on, Darren seemed like a good enough guy the few times that I’ve met him….why are you guys having issues?”

He bristled a bit “I know that you didn't mean it that way, but could you perhaps tone down your excitement when speaking about Darren.”

I hadn't thought I was excited about Darren ”I wasn't excited ...well outside of finding out that there really are werewolves …thats pretty neat. but umm ok, sure. I'm sorry” The confusion that I felt must have shone on my face as he looked a little sheepish.

He cleared his throat again “My apologies, The moon makes me a bit more sensitive. Our pack issues come from our philosophies. Jim and I believe that new were’s need to know how to fight and control themselves, we are focused on survival, and it can make some of our methods seem tougher than Darren would like. He also feels that Were’s don't need training in combat or defense as we have a marked advantage in strength and …. Uhh,stamina. It is understandable considering Darren’s first experience turning.”

“What do you mean? What happened?”

He bristled more”You seem very interested in Darren.” it came out snappish and growly.

He was being odd , but he warned me he was more sensitive around this time. Best to get off the topic “Ok, sore subject, got it. Back to my other question, how old are you, Argent?”

He ran a hand over his face, clearly embarrassed “No it's not, I'm sorry. Darren almost took the life of a loved one. I was able to stop him, but he was never able to move past that incident, understandably so. Since then, he has embraced a life of avid pacifism, not that he had looked for fights before.”

I felt for him, what an experience “Oh My god, that poor guy. Still, you guys’ sound like you would be better off working together.” I was starting to shiver; it was really cold in here.

“I said dont talk about him like that!” Argent growled at me and the hair on his body started to stand up. My eyes went wide, fear pulsed through me, and I scurried back until I bumped up against the door of the room. Crap! He had warned me not to run.

Sure enough , with one fluid movement he went from a harmless sitting position across the room to being on top of me, effectively pinning me to the door. I let out a small shriek which made him twitch and chuff. He sniffed at me, my hair, my neck, my chest and then licked his muzzle which held an evil grin.

He growled low, his eyes growing a much brighter red. I turned away, not meaning to but whimpering in fear. I was scared and cold and I didnt want to die, I needed to make it home to Neal, Oh god.

At my whimper, Argent pulled back and I was reminded that he was very naked. He closed his eyes and looked crestfallen “Sam, I'm so sorry. I would never hurt you. I'm sorry, please don't be afraid of me.” When he reached his hand to stroke my hair and I involuntarily flinched, the hurt in his eyes filled the air between us.

He pulled back a bit and put his giant paw under my hand that I had pulled tight to my chest, he slid it close to his muzzle and kissed the back of it. He then slunk over to me slowly, puppy like, and laid his head in my lap looking up at me like the biggest silvery wolfhound in the world.

“You're shaking Sam, please please calm down. I promise I won't hurt you. I shouldn't have yelled at you…just don't try to run, please.” He looked up at me in such a canine fashion, it would have been cute if I weren’t terrified for my life.

I closed my eyes and took a deep steadying breath, I needed to be able to trust him. So, I decided to push a little to see if he would keep his promise , and because I was genuinely curious” Why is Darren such a sore subject for you? You've freaked out everytime I mentioned him, why?” Argent bristled at Darren's name but paused from his dedicated snuggling in my lap.

“Darren is not a sore subject. You are talking about him IS.” He sat up and brought his nose to mine, curling his tail around my ankle. “Hunh?” I was utterly confused, and it was blending with the cold while the adrenaline from the evening was wearing off leaving exhaustion in its wake. I just wanted a blanket and to sleep for a week, my patience was thin at this point…just too much had happened, and everything was hazing over.

“There are only two things that are on a werewolves mind during the full moon Sam, Hunting...”

I nodded, that made sense.

He continued “And Mating.” He was waiting for my reaction on the last word.

Clarity shattered over me like a slap of cold water ”You’re jealous!” I was completely incredulous. He cocked his head and pulled back a little, his eyes slanting downwards in a thoughtful manner. “Not …quite….”

He then slid himself around and beneath me, landing me in his lap with him cradling me in his arms ``Territorial would be a better word….and insecure, perhaps.” He looked down at me and I blinked. He moved fast! However, he was incredibly warm and while I was still nervous, I was also incredibly cold, I snuggled into him without thinking about it and his tail folded over me in a reassuring gesture.

I turned my head to his chest “Why is it so cold in here?” I muttered. Between the warmth and listening to his heartbeat I was starting to nod off. Tonight, had been too much to process.

“Oh, I'm sorry!” Argent slapped his hand to his forehead “We run at a much warmer body temperature than humans. I keep this room cooler for when I change, I didnt even think about it, you must be freezing.” He pulled me in tighter so as he was semi wrapped around me “That's why you were shaking so much. I'm an idiot” He groaned again.

Ehhmmmm he was so nice, warm, and furry…just like a blanket, maybe a heating blanket. I had always enjoyed sleeping naked when I could at home and winter nights under a fluffy blanket were the best, I started to snuggle deeper into Argents chest while sliding my hips so as I was almost buried in his fur which smelled oddly like cedar, when I realized that I could feel his fur on my hip….against my bare skin!

I looked down and sure enough I was completely naked. “What happened to my shorts and my bra?!!!!” I started to look around when Argent silently held up the remains of my sliced off shorts with the tip of his claw.

I was taken aback ”Oh…When did THAT happen? I didn't even see you do that” I stared at the shorts; they were neatly sliced up both hips along the seams. My lace pink bra had the same slice pattern up the sides, but it went through the shoulder straps as well.

Argent chuckled “I like you alot Sam.” he averted his eyes then.

Realization dawned on me “When you jumped at me, you weren't trying to hurt me….you were playing, like a wolf in the wild.” He grinned sheepishly “An accurate…if a bit embarrassing comparison, but it was a little more than just play Sam.” his voice deepened and there was a husky note to it.

A thought skittered across my brain as it clicked puzzle pieces together “When Jesse said you were about to “Mark” me the other night….” Argent looked ashamed of himself and turned away unwilling to face me, all huskiness drained from him.

I sat up in his lap and pulled his face, well muzzle more accurately around to face me, even then he wouldn't look me in the eye, so I bent down and looked up at him until he had no choice but to make eye contact and I noticed then that his eyes had turned back to that gorgeous shade of blue that they were normally. I needed to be serious, but I really wanted to play with his ears, which were flattened now.

I held his face between my palms and stared at him” Tell me.” I said it softly to put him at ease. His shoulders slumped in defeat “Yes, I almost lost control and marked you last night. I nearly lost the battle with my instincts before you got out of my car. Truthfully, I still want to, but I’m in a clearer head space tonight and have better control. I am deeply ashamed of myself Sam.”

I felt my brows furrow “You were going to turn me?”

He shook his head sadly “No, that's not what marking does. To turn you I would need to bite you the way I bite Jim back in Nam.”

“So, what does marking mean?” I had an idea, but I wanted to hear it from him.

He sighed and ran a hand over the back of his neck “When we mark it is to claim a mate for ourselves. It is a very particular process, a claiming bite if you will. It signals to all other were's that the marked one belongs to one wolf and one wolf alone, the wolf that claimed them. Its effects work on humans as well”

Umm Hmm” And what would that mean for me?”

Argent whimpered and covered his face with his hand, his grip tightened around me in a reflexive fashion…as though he expected me to run “You would never be able to take another mate, no were or human could touch you, you would not be able to leave me. It would also prepare you to bear my cubs” I could swear he blushed.

I eyed him “What about my son, would that have affected him??”

Argent shook his head “Absolutely not. He is your blood, a part of you. If anything, it would have been akin to my adopting him and the rest of your family as my own. Making you part of My clan so to speak.” I sat in his lap, it was a little more serious than I had thought, quietly thinking.

Argent continued ”It is almost never done nowadays. And it is absolutely unheard of to mark a woman without her express consent. I almost committed a deeply shameful act upon you, and it took all of my willpower to keep you safe. I am 175 years old, and I should have much better willpower than I showed last night. That is why I fled, to keep you safe. But I hurt you in the process, for that I can only tell you how unbelievably sorry I am.”

That was a lot to take in. Argent and I had known each other for less than 10 days and he wanted to make me permanently his…….and I didn't mind at all.

The idea of being with him forever made me feel warm and tingly all over. The logical side of my brain mentioned that this was all way too fast.

“Sam, please say something.” He put his lower jaw on the top of my head “Please” he whispered. I didn't need to look at his face to know his eyes were shut tight.

“How long do werewolves live?”

“About five hundred years. Why?”

“What happens when I'm marked, and I pass away? I have 45 years left…if i'm really lucky.”

He pulled away from me a bit, wary “the mark slows the aging process, you would age at a were’s rate. Eventually those with the mark are turned…if they decide they want this life. Why?”

I knew exactly where I was headed where Argent was concerned.

I twisted my lips and looked up at him. ”I think we should probably date first before anything else….or maybe the illusion of dating would be more accurate.”

I felt his heart lurch “The Illusion?” He sounded so hurt. I smiled, good, teach him to withhold information from me. I batted my lashes up at him “I knew you felt like forever the first time I saw you.” His face lit up like a Christmas tree and I felt his heart jump.