Wrong Answers Only

for RM Stockton's 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡 𝐖𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐂𝐥𝐮𝐛 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 (𝐔𝐧𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞)

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if you multiply 5x5 you get 25. simple. easy. i was never a math wiz, but i like the circles more than the squares because when i look for them in the numbers, i always come up short. there are too many of them, numbers, i mean. they're not like letters and its scary because infinity is scary, but there is infinity in words too and i think i like that sort of infinity more because when you add words to each other there is no right answer. numbers are too sharp, too perfect and simple. but i don't think in simplicity, i like the wrong answers and i like the half solutions too, because words can never truly be wrong, they are all too beautiful for that.

still, circles. i sometimes think they are following me around, and i wonder, then, if maybe we are circling each other in turn, because we have no stopping point, no chinks in our armor; there are no sharp edges or rough corners to trip on and so when i see their infinity i can't help but love it, because the circles and the words are of the same sort, more than right, less than wrong, and everything in between.

the squares scare me, i think. i try not to show it. i try to laugh with them and join in their camaraderie but i don't want their attention because they are just as sharp as the numbers and i am afraid that they will trick me with their edges and leave me with nowhere left to hide. i have no corners of my own to shield me from their view, nothing to keep them from breaking my infinity and i fear that my own laughter will give me away. i don't know what is so funny.

still, the triangles are worse, their edges sharper, and so i do my best to avoid them all together. with their points and their formulas, i am terribly awed by their courage. to turn from one side to the next only to fall again in a different way than before. but to admire courage is not the same as finding it yourself and there are so many places to look that i don't know where to begin.

so i circle. and i care for the beautiful words like a gardener would their garden. i hope that when they bloom, maybe they will bring with them the courage i seek.