WRITING TO EXPRESS MYSELF.

“I fell in love with your personality first.”

“My personality?”

“Yes. Your personality.” Lilian stops reading her book to look at me. She bursts into laughter, clutching her stomach as if to control herself. I loved seeing her laugh.

“How’s that even a thing? Men love women for their physical looks, not their personality,” she says as she stops laughing, wiping the corner of her eyes.

I sit up on the bed and stare at her in awe. She sat on the bed, her legs crossed. Her hair was packed in a messy bun and she was dressed in one of my shirts, her worn copy of Jane Eyre lying face down on her lap. She was so beautiful she took my breath away, and she didn’t even try.

“Remember the first time we met?” I ask her. She rolls her eyes and smiles shyly. I don’t wait for her to answer.

“You were so shy. So shy your voice shook when you spoke to me.”

“Oh Michael, stop talking about it. That day was so embarrassing.” She cried out, covering her face in mock shame. I ignore her and continue.

“That dress Lilian. Damn, that dress you wore. It did things to me. I just knew you were the one for me when I saw you.”

“So, you did fall in love with me because of my personality and not my body?” she asks, smiling slyly. I don’t answer her.

“Our first kiss Lilian! I can’t believe I was your first kiss. Who has their first kiss at the age of 20?” I ask her incredulously. I knew what her answer would be but I loved to hear her say it every time.

“Arghhhh Micheal I told you already, I was waiting for the right man.” She says in frustration, laughing after when she sees the teasing look on my face.

“Glad I was the right man then. Better me than anyone else right?” I ask her. She laughs again. Her laughter damn!

“I love to hear you laugh Lilian. Even though you sound so evil, like a choking witch. I love to hear you laugh. It makes me happy.” I tell her sincerely, trying to get a rise out of her. She smiles, blushes even.

“I love your smile Liilian,” I continue. “I love how expressive it is. You smile with a pure heart, so emotive, so passionate. I love how soft your eyes get when you smile. I can’t explain it but you smile with your eyes and it’s so beautiful.”

“Oh my God Micheal you are going to make me cry. Why are you being so sweet this night? What’s happening?” she asks trying to hide her smile.

I look at her, basking in her presence, amazed by the comfort she brings me. I was so in love with this woman. Helplessly and Hopelessly in love.

“What else do you love about me?” She asks teasingly.

“I love the way you taste,” I whisper.

“What did you say?”

“I said I love the way you talk. I love how beautiful your skin is. I love your body. I love how perfect you fit into my arms. I love that you were made exactly for me.”

She smiles teasingly. She’s about to talk when we are interrupted by the sound of a baby crying.

“Your daughter’s awake. I have to go and check her.” She says as she stands up.

“I love you so very much Micheal, and I’m glad you are my husband. I’m glad you married me. And I’m happy to have a beautiful daughter with you.” She says as she kisses me before leaving our room for the nursery where our 6-month-old daughter, Belle is.

I watch my wife walk away. One year with this woman and I couldn’t get enough of her. I was in love. I was so in love. For her, I was a finished man.