To Every Sign I ignored, From Every Worry I'll have

The worries of yesterday always seem to creep up when things are at their brightest. Dusty skeletons I believed to be buried in their respective closets burst through flooding my mind. easily overthrowing any of the things I held in high regard. The scales are tipped and they rarely seem to fall in my favor. But when they do life has its way of reminding you.

“I’m still here..”

It forces, and pries its sense of justice upon you, reshaping the perception you have of not only yourself but concepts you use to hold in such high regard. ”Love” “Belonging” “Regret” “Purpose” and while it’s cementing itself in the back of your mind placing one brick after.

As your mind slowly finds itself free falling, spiraling down into feared territory. Passing by the signs you made a habit of avoiding, signs shown through a familiar name or a concealed memory possibly a death? You feared, these signs, in fact, you still do. So much so that you subconsciously made a habit of avoiding them at all costs. It’s a no-holds-barred battle of mentalities. Why are you always at a disadvantage? How does one win when all it takes is the smallest slip-up for everything to come crashing down all over again?

And again..and again…and again and-

With a mind so deteriorated and a will so frail you’ll look back on seldom moments of brightness. Part of you begging that you’d savored every last bit and the other part overshadowed by something you know all too well.

The worries of yesterday