The Spirit Box (3)

Chapter 3: The Magic Show

The Chief called me to his office to discuss a new case.

“Fred, are you familiar with the magician Kristo Angelov?” Chief said.

“No,” I said.

“Well, he’s famous. And he knows you, apparently. He saw you on TV after you solved your famous murder. He has a new trick that’s become controversial. He ‘summons Satan’ to do his bidding, then ‘Satan’ allegedly lights the stage on fire and makes the lights flicker. Then a deep voice is heard onstage speaking Latin and laughing while Kristo floats in the air and spins his head in a circle,” Chief said.

“And?” I asked.

“Well, this has apparently pissed off a lot of religious fanatics who are afraid he’s summoning the actual Satan and going to possibly trigger the apocalypse. I know it sounds ridiculous. It’s just a silly magic show, and it’s not that hard to figure out how he does his tricks. A child could figure it out. But these ultra religious whack jobs have been threatening Kristo’s life. He gave us a couple tickets to his show tonight and requested police protection. Would you and Yi mind going and vetting the audience. Then you can keep an eye on the guy until the show is over to make sure nobody tries anything stupid,” Chief said.

“Sure, sounds fun. I’ll go tell Yi about our date,” I said and stood up.

“You’re going to need the tickets,” Chief said.

I held out my hand and he handed me two tickets that included the name and address of the club.

“Oh, wow. It’s at The Scarlet Room. That’s across the way from The Blue Mercury. I always wanted to get a drink there, but every time I went it was a full house. Very hard to get in,” I said.

“Well, enjoy,” Chief said.

I walked out of Chiefs office.

“Yi, great news. We’re getting overtime and a show tonight,” I said.

“Why?” Yi asked.

“We’ve got to protect some putz magician who’s summoning Satan for his show because it’s pissing off the religious freaks,” I shouted.

“Sounds great, Byrne,” Yi said.

We passed the time cruising around in the squad car and giving tickets to speeders until eighteen hundred hours. At six, we headed over to the club. The show didn’t start until seven, but we were told to get there early so we could start vetting everyone before Kristo arrived.

We didn’t see anyone we thought of as suspicious, but if a religious freak was acting normal, how were we supposed to know he’s a religious whacko.

At seven o’clock, we stood by the door and watched the crowd coming in for any sign of religious psychos.

The lights flickered and an announcer broadcast his voice through the theater.

“We welcome the one and only, one of a kind amazing Kristo Angelov.”

Music started to play and the magician walked out on stage.

The audience burst into applause except for a couple in the back row.

“Burn in hell, Kristo,” one said.

“Stop summoning Satan! Death to you,” the other one jeered and they started throwing tomatoes on stage.

“Ok, guess the whack jobs got past us. Time to escort the assholes out of here,” I said.

Yi and I walked over to the hecklers. I flashed my badge.

“Ok, guys, time to leave. Let’s go,” I said.

“Oh, so you want the world to go to hell?” The heckler on the left asked.

“No. But you don’t need to worry about that. This is a magic show, sir. Let’s go,” I said and tried to shove him towards the door.

“Do you know who he is?” The left heckler asked and pointed to Kristo Angelov.

“Yes, I’m aware. I’m giving you three seconds too…”

“So you know he’s a Satanist who summons the devil for his show,” the heckler asked.

“If you’re so worried about this, why don’t you go to church and pray for him to stop?” I asked.

“I have. And god told me that he helps those who help themselves. I’m trying to help Kristo see the light,” the heckler on the left said.

“You can do that after the show. Now leave,”I said.

“No. He has security that keeps messengers like me away,” the heckler said.

“Seriously, you’re a messenger?” I asked the heckler.

“Yes. I’m god’s messenger. And I’m not leaving until Kristo renounces Satan,” the heckler said.

“Well, that’s too bad. You’re going to leave, now,” I demand.

“No,” the heckler said.

“Yes,” I said.

“Hell no,” the heckler said and smiled.

“Hell yes,” I said.

The heckler crossed his arms and continued to grin.

“Ok turn around. I’m placing you under arrest,” I said.

“I don’t think so,” the left heckler said and pushed me.

“I’ll add assaulting a police officer and resisting arrest to being a public nuisance. That’s a shame because if you didn’t just shove me I’d have let you go once you were outside,” I said.

“Do something about it,” The heckler said.

I grabbed his shoulder and forcefully turned him around so I could place the cuffs on him. His partner lifted his fist and was about to throw a left cross when Yi tasered him. He dropped to the ground and began convulsing.

“Thanks, Yi,” I said.

Yi handcuffed the guy on the ground and we escorted them to the back of our police car.

“Alright, let’s go watch the rest of the show. Might be a few more crazies inside,” I said.

“What about these guys?” Yi asked.

“What about ‘em. They’re not going anywhere,” I said.

“I have to go pee,” The right heckler said.

“Oh, sorry to hear that. Did you want me to get you an adult diaper?” I asked.

“That’s better then going in my pants,” the heckler said.

“Aww, you poor thing. You should have thought of that before you threw a right cross at me. In the meantime, use your pants, buddy,” I said. I closed the car door, then Yi and I walked back inside.

We opened the theater doors and got a standing ovation from the audience.

“Thank you, thank you,” I said. Yi and I took a bow.

“You guys are real hero’s,” Kristo Angelov said from the stage and pointed at us.

We sat back down. He started the show again. He started with a ring trick, a card trick and a coin trick. The crowd went crazy when he finally did his Satan summoning trick. It was everything chief said it would be and more. I thought chief said it was easy to figure out how he did it, but the trick looked hyperrealistic. I thought I had it figured out before the show, but I couldn’t explain its realness. My spirit box started shaking in my pocket. Maybe John sensed another spirit. I’d have to ask Kristo Angelov how he does it after the show.

“For my next trick, I’m going to bring out my magic closet and summon my lovely assistant, Chrissy, to the stage,” Kristo Angelov said.

A curly short haired, freckled, young blonde in a pearl white, short sleeved sequin dress that went down as far as her knees, a pearl necklace, pearl colored sequined high heals and a pearl colored cloche hat with a rose shaped bow on the end walked out on stage. She waved at the audience.

“Chrissy, find your way into the box. Thanks,” Kristo Angelov said and winked at her.

“Sure thing, toots,” Chrissy responded and winked at Kristo.

Chrissy walked inside the box and Kristo closed the door. He put a white star and pentagram covered purple magic blanket over the box and lit it on fire. The audience gasped.

“I’ll open the door and Chrissy will be gone,” Kristo said.

Kristo opened the door, and Chrissy was definitely gone. She was dead, completely covered in blood, a sword was sticking out of her mouth. The audience gasped.

“Oh my god, Chrissy. NO! Somebody help, this not part of the act. Detective Byrne, are you still here?” Kristo shouted.

Yi and I took out our badges.

“Nobody leaves until we ask everyone here a few questions. Security, lock the doors, please,” I said.

“Whomever did this is probably long gone,” Yi whispered.

“Probably. But maybe somebody saw something or somebody suspicious,” I said.

We had the audience form a line, we called a couple extra cops to meet us at the scene, and we questioned the audience with no luck.

“If anybody remembers anything, don’t forget to call the police,” I shouted at the last few audience members leaving.

“If you saw something, say something,” Yi shouted.

“Thanks, Yi. That was… helpful…” I said with slight condescension.

I walked up to Kristo to ask him some questions.

“So, do you have any secret entrances on this stage?” I asked Kristo.

“Yes, but I don’t use them anymore. They’ve been locked for a while. The only way in or out of my magic box is through the front and back door. It’s a double sided box, that’s how I make… made Chrissy disappear. And I had my eyes on both sides of the box, nobody went in or out,” Kristo said.

“Where did you get this box? Is it possible it malfunctioned or was meant for a different trick?” I asked.

“Possibly, it’s a new box. It just arrived this morning. It’s my first time using it. I should have tested it first. It was custom built by The League of Extraordinary Nerds… or something,” Kristo said.

I inspected the box for clues.

“The League of Extraordinary Scientists?” I asked.

“Yah, that’s them. How did you know?” Kristo asked.

“Because I just found a sealed envelope in Chrissy’s box. Their name is on it, and it’s addressed to you,” I said.

“What does it say?” Kristo asked.

I opened it and started to read the letter.

“Dear Mr. Angelov,

Thank you for your purchase of the magic box. It has not only helped us raise capital to open up more toy stores and magic shops around the world, but also allowed us to conduct an experiment and test out our latest invention, The Magical Murder Box. Whenever someone goes inside, they trigger our camera. Then we turn on the camera and enjoy The Magical Murder Show. Is it really murder, though, if it’s for sport or in the name of science? Now that our experimental box has successfully worked, you know that you can’t protect your assistants from us. And since you can’t beat us, join us. The world shall soon know they are not safe from us, and shall promptly surrender. We were bullied for being smart, and now we shall rule the world and teach our bullies a lesson, all thanks to you and whomever you put in our box. We will now use our army of toys to take over the world, and nobody can stop us. Your magic show was weak, and we made it better. We will continue to make it better if you come work for us. Looking forward to building you another box in the future, and maybe you can use your ‘magic’ to stop it from killing your next assistant! All in the name of science! Are you up for the challenge? Hail science! Thank you for your business,

Yours truly,

The League of Extraordinary Scientists.”

The letter ended there.

“Who are these people? They sound insane. They killed your assistant just to see if you could protect her?” Yi asked

“They are insane. They’re delirious maniacs. Their box killed my assistant and they think I’m going to buy another? What the hell is wrong with them? If I knew about this… murder box, I never would have let her get in. You hear that, you scientist bastards? She never would have went in,” Kristo screamed, then started to sob.

“I’m sorry,” I said and put my hand on Kristo’s shoulder.

When his sobbing came to an end, I asked Yi to give Kristo and I a moment alone before I asked him a question. Yi gave me a funny look and walked to another part of the room.

“I have an important question. It’s related to the case. Do you know what a spirit box is?” I asked.

“A what?” Kristo asked and gulped.

“A spirit box. They’re usually sold by oily haired, unclean smelly men selling things out of mysterious and possibly magical white van. It’s ok, you can trust me?” I said.

“I know that. But how do you know what a spirit box is?” Kristo asked.

“I got one too, for boxing. That’s my hobby. John L. Sullivan’s my spirit. Who’s yours,” I asked.

“Howard Thurston. Famous magician from the nineteenth century. He was known for his extravagant illusions and stage presence,” Kristo said.

“Well, it’s good to know it’s not the spirit of Satan,” I said. Kristo laughed.

“Well, I got that idea because when Howard was a child, he practiced sleight of hand, but his mother viewed this as devil's work. But no actual devil is at play here. Just a regular spirit of a magician trapped in a perfectly normal spirit box," Kristo said.

“Did you remember to put him back in the box?” I asked.

“Oh that’s right. Hours almost up,” Kristo said. He took out his spirit box and blew his nose into it, ejecting Howard Thurston back inside.

“I’ll have to come see one of your boxing matches sometime,” Kristo said.

“You should. Yi, you can come back now,” I shouted.

Yi wandered back.

“So what’s this big secret?” Yi asked.

“Oh, I just needed to know how Kristo did his tricks. I figured he wouldn’t want too many people to hear,” I said.

“Oh, damn. I always wanted to learn magic,” Yi said.

“So, where did you get the magic murder box? Does this League of Extraordinary Scientists have an address?” I asked.

“Yah, they’re right down the street. I thought they were an ordinary magic supply shop, not a murder store. I bought it yesterday and they dropped it off this morning. Come with me, I’ll show you where the store is,” Kristo said.

“I got an idea. We’ll follow you to the shop, then we’ll have you go in alone. Act like you want to join them and get them to confess. We’ll record them, then come in for the arrest,” I said.

“How will you record them?” Kristo asked.

“I got a small camera in my car. We’ll hook you up,” I said.

“Alright,” Kristo said.

We told the coroner we were done inspecting the box and he went to take the body away. Then we went to the car, dropped the two satanist hecklers off at the police station, then got ready for the sting.

***********

Kristo was ready to go. He had a small camera on his shirt that looked like a button, and his phone was set up to record conversations in case anything went wrong with the camera.

“Do you remember what to do?” I asked.

“Yes. Go in, play to their ego. Tell them their invention was genius. Tell them I was bullied too and am more then happy to help them take over the world,” Kristo said.

“Perfect! We’ll be right outside waiting! When we hear their confession, Yi and I and the backup from the other van will rush in and make the arrests,” I said.

“Why can’t you arrest them now? You have the letter?” Kristo asked.

“We’d like a confession to prove they wrote the letter,” I said. Kristo shrugged.

“I guess that makes sense,” Kristo said.

Kristo took a deep breath, exited the car, and walked inside. We watched him on our monitors. He walked up to someone at the front desk.

“Excuse me, sir, my name is Kristo…” Kristo was interrupted.

“We know who you are. Are you here to join us, or be our next experiment?” the man asked.

“I, too, was bullied as a child and sympathize with your cause. Thank you for your gift, it was a great murder box,” Kristo said.

“Come with us,” the man said.

“Us? I only see you,” Kristo said.

“Ah, have I not introduced my other half yet? I’m Dr. Victor E. Nigma. Inside my body, I have someone very special. It’s the spirit of Albert Einstein, who’s helped me build my world ending devices so we can take over the world,” Doctor E. Nigma said.

“Oh, where did you get this spirit from? A box?” Kristo asked and laughed nervously.

“Yes. But we don’t like to talk about the box. Einstein knows that if he doesn’t help me, he goes back in the box forever. That’s the only reason he’s agreed to help, you see,” Dr. Nigma said.

“So, Einstein doesn’t want to help you?” Kristo asked.

“He does now. But enough about Einstein. Do you want to help us?” Dr. Nigma asked.

“Of course. That’s why I’m here,” Kristo said.

“Come with us,” Dr. Nigma said.

Victor lead Kristo to a secret door that required both a passcode, a thumbprint, and a key to enter.

Kristo went inside the secret room and the video got fuzzy, but the sound was still good.

“Let me introduce you to my team. That’s Dr. It, who has the spirit of Isaac Newton. That’s Dr. Nick, who has the spirit of Nikola Tesla. And lastly, that’s Dr. Alex, who has the spirit of Ada Lovelace,” Dr. Nigma said.

“Out of curiosity, which one of you guys built the genius murder box?” Kristo asked.

“That would be me,” Dr. Nigma said.

“And who wrote me the lovely letter inside? The one inviting me to your club?” Kristo asked.

“That would also be me. Why do you ask?” Dr. Nigma said.

“Um, well, no reason. I just wanted to thank you for inviting me…” Kristo started to say but was interrupted by the sound of an explosion and tear gas as Yi and I rushed in with the rest of the team.

“Freeze, hands in the air,” I yelled and pointed my gun at them.

“Too bad for you, this place is rigged to explode,” Dr. Nigma said and laughed manically. He then pressed a button, which opened up a trap door beneath him and he disappeared into it. The other scientists quickly followed before we had a chance to arrest them.

Kristo inhaled Howard Thurston from his spirit box and said, “follow them into the door. If they built it to escape, it wouldn’t be rigged or booby trapped,” and he jumped inside. The trap door closed behind him.

“Everyone outside. They coudn’t have gone far,” I said. We went outside to see the scientists in BattleMech suits. Dr. Nigma was pointing his missile loaded battle arm at Kristo’s head.

The BattleMech suits were surrounded by armed drones.

“Wow, impressive,” I said. I turned around and inhaled John.

“To bad your ploy to get a confession failed. We now have a hostage, and anything we said was coerced. Your undercover magician, Kristo Angelov, belongs to us now,” Dr. Nigma said.

“Kristo, get ready to move. Everybody, stand behind me,” I shouted.

“Don’t worry about me. I can disappear,” Kristo said and winked.

“Surrender or die,” Dr. Nigma said.

I looked for something to grab and spotted a fire hydrant. Ugh, I’d have to call Bobby to fix this again. I guess I’d owe him another favor.

“We surrender. Let us live,” I shouted as I slowly inched towards the fire hydrant.

“We’re going to kill you anyway, ha ha ha,” Dr. Nigma said.

I ran to the fire hydrant as Dr. Nigma launched a missile out of his Mech suit. It missed me, and I ripped the hydrant out of the ground and threw it at the Mech suit, crippling its leg.

Kristo took advantage of the opportunity and disappeared. He reappeared behind one of the other mech suits and ripped out the wires from its leg, effectively shutting it down.

I ran behind Dr. Nigma’s suit and ripped off the damaged leg and used it to beat the rest of his suit to smithereens.

I went to the suit’s head, which was now laying on the ground, punched through the glass, and ripped the now bloodied Dr. Nigma out of the suit.

“Well, Victor, it looks like you’re my hostage now,” I said and dragged him in front of his three friends.

“Get out of your Mech suits, or your going to blow up your leader, too,” I shouted.

“You forget, officer, that we have drones,” Dr. Nigma said. I heard the whirring of drones behind me. One of them made a charging sound as it was preparing to launch its weapon. I gulped, then heard several gunshots. I turned around and saw the damaged drones on the ground.

“And we have guns,” Detective Yi shouted at Dr. Nigma.

“Thanks, Yi. Nice save,” I said.

I placed my gun squarely on Dr. Nigma’s forehead.

“Go ahead, launch your missiles. You’ll kill your leader,” I shouted.

“It’s ok, get out of the mech suits. We have other priorities,” Dr. Nigma said. The three scientist lowered the heads of their mech suits to the ground and got out. They were placed under arrest and taken to the police cars.

As I was taking Dr. Nigma into my car, Kristo walked up to him and spit in his face.

“That’s for Chrissy, you psycho,” Kristo said.

Then I shoved Kristo into the back seat.

We drove them to the police station. There was an army of mechanical toys surrounding the station, all holding weapons, all pointed at us.

“You should let us go,” Dr. Nigma hissed. I put him in front of me.

“I’ll just use you to block your little toys until you decide to cooperate,” I said.

“You can’t stand here forever,” Dr. Nigma said smugly and laughed.

“Yi, radio the other officers inside. Have them bring out the X2’s,” I said.

“What are X2’s?” Dr. Nigma asked.

“You’ll see. And for such a smart guy, I’m surprised you don’t know,” I said.

The officers in the station came out with X2 Tasers.

“You guys wouldn’t mind zapping armed toys, would you?” I asked.

The officers started zapping the toys. Some of the toys zapped back or attacked with blades, but the officers were quick to maneuver around them and worked their way to safety before zapping additional toys.

Once they were gone, a new set of toys showed up.

“We have an endless supply of toys,” Dr. Nigma.

I took out my walkie talkie and radioed the bomb squad to bring an EMP.

“You think an electromagnetic pulse will stop us? Ha ha ha!” Dr. Nigma said and laughed.

“Meh, it’ll slow you down,” I said.

“We’re on our way. Can you guys hold them off for ten minutes,” the guy on my walkie talkie said.

“What do you think, Yi? Can we hold them off for ten minutes?” I asked.

“Hell yah! Let’s grab some more tasers from inside,” Yi shouted.

We ran back inside and each of us grabbed a fistful of taser batons and handed them out to the other officers.

Eleven minutes later, the bomb squad showed up.

“You’re late,” I shouted.

“Yah, yah, you’re still alive,” the guy said.

They took out the EMP from their truck and activated it, and down went the toys.

“This guy might have more toys. Can we use that again if they do?” I asked the guy in charge of the bomb squad unit.

“Sure thing. It plugs in and recharges fast. It just needs an outlet. Name’s Lee, by the way,” Lee said.

“Thanks, Lee. We got a few outlets out here,” I said and pointed to one of the outlets.

He plugged in the EMP device, and wave after wave of invading toys was obliterated.

“Can you bring some more of those EMP’S? We can set them up around the station,” I asked.

“Sure,” Lee said.

“Thanks,” I said

He left and an hour later he showed up with a dozen more EMP’S and helped us set them up.

**********

Dr. Victor E. Nigma and his team of evil toy making scientists were now safely locked in separate cells. I had forced each one to put their spirits back in their respective boxes. I’d give the spirit boxes to scientists that didn’t want to use them to take over the world. In the meantime, I took them back to my apartment for safe keeping. Well, as safe as they could be with Emily living there. I’d have to lock them in my money safe. The spirits of Einstein, Tesla, Newton and Lovelace should be inventing, not plotting world domination!

Yi stopped me carrying the boxes to my car.

“Hey, Fred. What’s in those boxes?” Yi asked.

“Um, they’re toy boxes. I deactivated their weapons. I was going to give them to my nephew,” I said.

“You sure those aren’t spirit boxes?” Yi asked. My jaw dropped.

“How the hell do you know what a spirit box is?” I asked Yi.

“I just got one last night. I was sparring with a buddy of mine at my karate lesson. He won the match, and a guy in a white van was sitting outside and he sold me one. He told me my partner, the other officer he saw me with, had one too. Said it would help me with my sparring matches. Mysterious something,” Yi said.

“No shit. Mysterious Joe sold you a box, too? Who’s your spirit?” I asked.

“Bruce Lee,” Yi said.

“No way, you got Bruce Lee?” I asked.

“And you got John L. Sullivan, if I’m not mistaken,” Yi said. I nodded.

“Can I watch one of your sparring matches. I’d love to see Bruce Lee back in action,” I asked.

“Sure, I got a match tomorrow,” Yi said.

“Done. I’ll be there,” I said.

“Did you put your spirit back in its box? Pretty sure I saw you using it earlier and it’s been more then an hour,” Yi said.

“Crap, I forgot,” I said. I tried sneezing John back into his box and he wouldn’t leave.

“Ha ha ha. Now I can stay here as long as I want,” John said.

“Yi, I need a favor. Come to the locker room with me real quick. John won’t leave and I can’t sneeze him back into the box. I’m thinking if he has to watch us make out he wouldn’t be too happy,” I said.

“Sure, no problem. And let’s do it here. I don’t care who sees us,” Yi said.

“You wouldn’t dare,” John said.

I leaned in for a kiss and Yi and I made out to cheers from the other officers.

“Ok, ok. I can’t watch this. I’ll go back in the box,” John said.

I had Yi stand in front of me while I sneezed into the box. This time, John went back in.

“I don’t think John will be doing that again,” I said and laughed. Yi smiled.

I informed the night shift officers of the situation with the toys and told them they had to have a couple officers outside to activate the EMP’s if necessary.

I clocked out right after Yi and headed to my car.

There was a flyer on my window with Emily’s picture on it. She was holding a spirit box next to her face and smiling. She was also wearing a headscarf and a pentagram necklace.

“What the hell is this?” I asked and took the flyer off my window and read it.

“Come see the great clairvoyant, Madam Emily, for a seance or tarot reading today. Bring this special flyer and you’ll get half off the normal $500 fee, a great deal. Missing a deceased friend or a loved one? The Great Madam Emily can contact them. Come communicate with them today!”

I thought I said no scams. Maybe the spirit she had was an actual psychic. If not, she’s out.

I drove home and walked to my apartment.

It was dark inside and the apartment door was open. When I walked in, I noticed my emergency candles were burning around the house. At least Emily was making an effort to seem legitimate.

“Emily, you home?” I shouted. No answer. I took out my baton before walking inside.

“Boo,” someone said and jumped out from behind my couch. I hit the person with my baton and heard a thud hit the ground.

I turned on the lights and saw Emily all dressed up.

“Crap. Sorry Emily. You shouldn’t have scared me,” I said.

“I thought… you knew.. I was here…” Emily wheezed.

“You left the door open and the lights were out. Given your track record of evil, drug dealing and violent ex boyfriends and drug dealers you owe money to, I didn’t know if something had happened to you again,” I said.

Emily caught her breath and tried to stand up, but couldn’t.

“That’s going to leave a bruise,” Emily said.

“Again, sorry. Also, I found this flyer on my car. What exactly are you up to, and whose spirit box did you get?” I asked.

“How did you know I had a spirit box?” Emily asked.

“I saw it in your flyer. I recognized it because I have one too. Mine’s a famous boxer, John L. Sullivan,” I said.

“Oh. Is that how you crushed my ex-dealers skull in and painted your walls red so easily?” Emily asked. I winked.

“My spirit is Ann O'Delia Diss Debar, famous clairvoyant. Some people in her day called her a fraud, but she’s made spirit paintings while in my body. She’s definitely real. I’m using her powers to make some money,” Emily said.

“I don’t know, sounds borderline scammy, Emily,” I said.

“No, no. I assure you, it’s not. She’s totally legit. Look, I got a couple clients coming in a minute. Let me show you what we can do,” Emily said.

“Alright, fine. But if I let you do this, you have to get a day job. There’s an opening at the police station for a secretary. I want you to have a fallback plan in case this doesn’t work out. The faster you make money, the sooner you can get out of my apartment,” I said.

She put her hand in the air for me to help her up. I jolted her arm and she stood.

“That’s fair,” Emily said.

We sat on the couch for twenty minutes before her clients finally arrived.

She turned my lights on, but kept them dim, inhaled Ann O'Delia Diss Debar, then opened the door slowly.

“Welcome, welcome. You must be Mister And Misses Smith,” she said. They came in and the door closed behind them.

“The spirits are already here,” she said. Nice touch, I thought.

They walked to my table, which Emily had decorated with a crystal ball and confetti, and sat down.

“You want to contact a recently deceased loved one,” Emily asked.

“Yes, how did you know?” Mr. Smith asked.

“Because you paid for the seance package… cough… I mean, the spirits told me. Is it your… grandmother, misses Smith? Grandma Hilda?” Emily asked.

“Oh my god, you’re amazing,” Misses Smith said.

“Grandma Hilda wants me to give you something,” Emily said and started drawing a picture.

She finished and handed it to them.

“Oh my god, that’s Grandma Hilda at your wedding, George,” Misses Smith said.

“Grandma Hilda says she’s watching over you. She says be safe and drink more green tea,” Emily said.

“Tell her we love her,” Misses Smith said.

“She heard you,” Emily said and smiled. After a few more minutes of psychic nonsense and some casual gossip, Mr. Smith paid Emily and left. I turned on the lights.

“Well, that was fantastic, Emily. Just fantastic. What a show,” I said and clapped my hands. Emily sneezed her spirit back into the box.

“Thanks, Fred,” Emily said and smiled.

“I better see you at the station tomorrow. Otherwise, no more seances and you’re out of my apartment,” I said.

“Sure thing, Fred. Could you give me a ride?” Emily asked.

“Sure. Fine,” I said. I went to my fridge, grabbed a soda, sat down on my couch and turned on the TV.

“I was going to go to sleep on the couch tonight,” Emily said.

“Sleep on the floor,” I said.

“Ugh. You’re so mean,” Emily said. She grunted and stuck out her tongue.

Emily sat next to me on the couch.

“I guess I can watch a few minutes of TV with you. For old times sake,” Emily said. Then she put her head on my shoulder.

I rolled my eyes and said, “Ew, gross. Your concupiscence knows no bounds, you Eldritch lecherous philanderer,” I said.

Emily sighed.

“Thanks for taking me in, Fred,” Emily said.

“Even though you forced me to, you’re welcome,” I said.

Copyright © 10/12/2023 by A.H. Mittelman. All rights reserved.