The Scream

From behind my eyelids the sun colored my dreams in red. The man was screaming, arms outstretched in my direction, behind him a small boy with curly hair with a look of fear on his face mouthed the word “Momma”. When I opened my eyes they were gone, replaced with the debris and dust and myself amongst the rubble. I sat up, a searing pain spread from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. I instinctively touched the top of my head , a warm thick liquid oozing out. My legs were pinned by a large pile of concrete and it appeared that I was in some sort of crater of wreckage , a bomb maybe? where is everyone? am I the only survivor ? Taking a deep breath I tried to steady my nervous heart, being alone and wounded is not the time to panic, or at least that’s what I had been taught. I? I thought to myself. The next question I asked myself brought on a bigger sense of panic, Who am I ?

I could feel myself spiraling into fear the more I thought about the question , not knowing where I was or even if I would get out of this pit seems like small matters compared to not even knowing my own name. Taking another deep breath , I tried to center myself and focus on the most pressing matter at hand, the concrete strewn across my legs . From my seated position I lifted the small rocks , then the larger ones one by one until my legs were cleared.

More pain shot through my body , but there was no time to rest. A sense of urgency was upon since I had awoken , something told me it was not a good idea to be wounded out in the open . Reaching down I gingerly felt my legs for damage , I couldn't feel any broken or protruding bones so I tried to wiggle my toes, I felt them move inside my boots and a small sense of relief came over me . Slowly I pulled my knees to my chest then under me shifting into a squatting position, that’s when I saw it .

A bright glimmer of gold in the dust of the rubble, I reach for it , just a heart shaped locket I thought at first until I opened it and saw the man from my dream. He was holding the curly haired boy , the one who called me Momma. A wave of hope washed over my body , I began to tear and almost laugh to myself , this is who I was. I was this boy’s mother and this Man’s wife , and I needed to get back to them . Nothing else mattered , not even my name.

Once I concluded my body, although badly damaged was still in relative working condition, I began to make my ascent out of the pit. From amongst the rubble , I could see the only way out was up, so I began to climb. The sun was above me at the beginning of the journey but as I reached the top it was now resting on the horizon.

I clawed my way onto the asphalt of street level and covered in dust. The dust was everywhere , in my eyes , up my nose and burning my lungs. I collapsed onto the ground, choking , coughing and spitting up dirt. after a few moments I looked around, seeing everything was gray and covered in dust , just like the pit. No one on the street either , and there were no sounds of life.

I closed my eyes and pictured my family in my final moments with them , I tried not to focus on the despair in their faces and just look for clues. My husbands arms outstretched towards me the gray sky filling my vision and the feeling of falling. I fell in , that's right , I said to myself , how I did not see the ledge of this pit was lost on me but I decided to search the perimeter for clues.

The pit, was more of a chasm and now I could see the full extent of it and felt very grateful to be alive, looking down back where I had came from I noticed it went much deeper than where I landed , and again thanked my lucky stars I didn't fall straight through. Hobbling along the edge , I could see the ground was split open for several city blocks and wondered if I would ever make it around. After a few feet I saw a piece of colorful paper held down with a rock and placed at the edge of the pit. A child’s drawing , My child’s drawing , I knew it was .

The picture was of two stick figures one large and one small standing on top of a mountain with three peaks and snowy tops , The words “ For Momma “ were written in large print in what would be the sky. I stared at the picture for a minute , trying to hold back tears. Had my son drew this picture while he waited for his father to find me? did he know I would make it out ? I could not remember my son’s age but he was just a small child , in the back of my mind I began to hope that he would not remember this traumatic experience and that If I did not make it back to them I hope he would not remember me. As I lifted my gaze from the paper. Before me, in the distance I saw a mountain , with three snow covered peaks.

I did not know when the last time I had eaten was, but I told myself it was the day of the fall and that I had not been long without food and would not starve , but it felt like it. I pushed on ,making my journey to the mountain. I was able to find an abandoned store with a few supplies to treat my wounds, a little water and a change of clothes for my journey . When I felt exhausted I pulled the locket out and looked at the faces of my family and reassured them I was on my way back to them.

It had been two sunsets since I awoke in the pit, tonight would make the third. Around midday I had past the outskirts of the city and as night drew close I headed deeper into the forest surrounding the base of the mountain, seeing no signs of life along the way.

It was colder, darker in the forest and I could no longer see the faces in the locket or make out the stick figures on the mountain top, but now I could hear the voices.

“how long we gotta be out here , Jim ?

“ until morning, that’s the deal, and you know it already so don't play dumb”

“man I haven't seen one of those screamers for days!”

I heard the younger man spit out of frustration.

“yea, you wont see em’ , cant tell till it’s too late” said Jim

“ oh, man you believe all that , The body snatching?! They’re just plain ol’ killers man”

Another spit.

“ no need for a disguise when you can just straight up kill-” the younger man said with sarcastic humor in his voice.

I had crouched down behind a tree instinctively when I first heard them speak , I hadn’t heard or seen anyone in days so the sound was foreign and startled me. I learned forward to hear them better when a small twig snapped beneath my palm.

“ quiet! ...you heard that ?” Jim whispered harshly

“y-y-yea, I heard-”

“hush!...get ready”

Then I heard the metallic clinks of weapons being loaded. I thought about revealing myself for a moment , emerging with my hands raised and telling I mean no harm, but in my gut I could feel that would not end well for me . I decided to stay hidden, making myself as small and as silent as possible against the base of the tree. The two men walked in separate directions, with quiet footsteps I could barely hear over the sound of my own heart beating. After a few moments I decided it was best to leave this area because those men where here to stand guard and they will surely be back.

I didn't sleep or stop for the rest of the night. If hunger or exhaustion didn't kill me , I now had armed men and these “Screamers” to worry about, but I couldn’t waste any energy on being afraid , I had to find my family.

When dawn finally broke I could see the trees clearing. The thought of holding my husband and my child in my arms, seeing their faces, not in pain , but joy , drove me forward . I kept walking though my body was in agony. I walked until the air become thin and the sky filled with snow. I walked until the sun again met the horizon .I knew soon I would be lost in the snowy darkness but I had no choice but to push forward.

There were three peaks on this mountain so I made for the highest one, I figured that is where people might feel most safe and if I did not find them there I may be able to spot my family on one of the peaks below. Sunlight lingered, reflecting off the snowy ground as dusk approached and I was grateful for the extra light. I peered up at the highest peak , estimated I might be there by midnight, long after this light has faded.

I starred up at it contemplating my best option when my foot stepped into something that made my heart stop. A footprint. I hadn’t seen any before , maybe they had just been covered by the freshly falling snow, but the air was clear here and could see two sets of tracks before me leading off in the distance. I felt as thought my heart was going to leap out of my chest and run ahead of me because my body was too slow. I heaved my legs forward , one after the other, the locket still in my frozen clutches pushing me on .

Two figures emerged before me in the distance , I gave chase as fast as I could, legs and body feeling like lead. I wanted to call out to them but fear stopped me as I remembered the armed men and the “Screamers”. I had to get closer and make sure it was who I was looking for. As I grew near I could see clearly that one figure was much larger than the other and the smaller one had a head of curly hair. My heart was almost beating out of my chest.

No need to check the locket I knew I had found them , I could feel it in my bones. sobbing tears of happiness I stumbled through the snow after them. I opened my mouth to call for them , It had been so long since I spoke and my throat was so dry the words did not come. I held my mouth open wide and tried but again and again , but nothing. I was becoming desperate. Fear overcame me as I saw my family getting further ahead, know I could not catch or keep up. I swallowed whatever moisture I could gather in my mouth and took a deep breath, I needed to make a sound, I needed them to hear me!

Then I opened my mouth and let out the scream. I had never heard a sound like that before, a terrible guttural noise , a sound maybe an animal would make … or something , not even human.