The Owl

The owl

I loved being on the road, always did. It gave me a chance to be alone with my thoughts, or the radio with someone else’s thoughts. Ever since I was a kid and my parents would take us somewhere, I loved taking road trips. Whether it was to a resort or relatives in another state, the thrill of the open road was for me.

I don't know if it was the love, or the nostalgia of the road that led me into traveling sales or if it was just happenstance, but there I was. The road was my home now. The winters in the northeast were not as bad as the winters in the Midwest, but it could get very cold and just as extreme.

As it happened, I was in a hurry to get home one day. Rather than check into another hotel I decided to push on and get home late. I was driving from Portland Maine to Burlington Vermont, mid-November. Always a dicey proposition. One minute a beautiful blue, cloudless sky, the next minute a raging blizzard. It was getting late into the afternoon by the time I got to the middle of New Hampshire. New Hampshire is a beautiful state. Miles of emptiness, punctuated by random houses surrounded by woods of tall Pines, Oaks, and Maples. On a cloudy day or at dusk the trees could give you tunnel vision and could be hypnotizing. In the late afternoon, or on a sunny day the sun streaming through the canopies of trees could be blindingly bright and give a strobe effect. The other dangerous effect of the sun was that any melted snow on the road would turn into dark, barely visible puddles. Not so bad during the day but as the sun drops in the sky and the temperatures dip those puddles can become patches of black ice. Black ice at 65 mph is incredibly dangerous. The ride you take can be horrific and there is no warning. Traveling along one minute jamming along, the next moment your limbic system has commanded your hands to grab the steering wheel in a death grip as the car slides on the black ice. Your tires turn into ice skates, and you spin uncontrollably. You are simply along for the ride. There is no driving the car, the car is now driving you.

It happened so fast I didn’t know what hit me! The black ice caused my car to slide over the shoulder and roll off the embankment down a hill and come to rest at the bottom of the hill in a small ravine. The car rolled as it went down the embankment and when it finally stopped there wasn't a sound other than that of the tires spinning to a slowly to a stop. I took a moment to collect my wits and figure out what had just happened. I was now sitting on the roof inside of the car. The driver's side door was slightly ajar, and I could only open it about 6 inches. The edge of the ravine that I had landed in was up against it. At least I wasn't soaking wet. The ravine was partially frozen. I reached over to the passenger door and was relieved to find out that it could open just enough when I pushed it that I was able to crawl out. I slowly got up and surveyed the scene. I had a moment when I looked at the car sitting in the ravine on its roof. I looked up towards the road which was a good 10 feet or more above where I stood. I choked up just a little as I thought to myself how much I just went through. This was no mere fender bender! The car was upside down, 10 feet below the road and in a ravine! Do you know how much effort it takes to do this I yelled to no one in particular.

I tried again to gather my wits, but once the tires stopped spinning, I was struck by the magnitude of the silence. No traffic, no radios, no road noises. Nothing but the wind whistling through the trees that now surrounded me.

I don't know how long I had been there, time came to a stop. I was clueless to the time. I also didn't have my phone with me, it was still in the car. As I stood there pondering my situation, I was startled by a large, black apparition. Then with a flap in the wind it disappeared. I couldn't be sure if what I thought I saw was real or just the remnant of a bump on the head during the rollover. I couldn’t even be sure of what it was when the silence was broken by an eerie “whoo…..” and in an instant the black shadow again flew past me. This time though it stopped in the trees behind me. I turned, slowly, to see what it was. I wasn't sure I wanted to know but I looked in the trees and I could make out a large figure. I stood there staring, trying to figure out exactly what it was I was looking at when again I heard the eerie “whoo….” This time it was much louder and appeared to come from the “thing” that sat in the tree, a good 20 feet above me. It turned its head to reveal a large, round white face. A brown ring circled its face and two large black piercing eyes were staring at me. It was an owl, a large barn owl. It continued to stare at me, its large eyes blinking. It stood deathly still. I was bigger than the owl, but I couldn't help but wonder if it thought of me as just another item of prey. I knew that owls ate rodents and such, but how hungry this one was I had no way of knowing. We stared at each other for what felt like an eternity then with a leap and the flapping of its giant wings it took off through the branches.

I had still not heard any cars on the road above. I knew though that I had to get back up to the road. There was no way anyone would know I was down there. There were no skid marks because of the black ice to indicate that a car had gone off the road. It was getting late, and the woods were looking dark and foreboding. I knew that New Hampshire forests could go on for miles. If I chanced going through the woods I might happen upon a homestead or a cabin. I thought that if I got lucky enough to find something it would also be my luck that it would be abandoned. Instead, I would have to try and climb the 10 feet or so up the side of the icy, muddy, and steep embankment, and so that is what I was going to do.

I went to my car and squeezed in through the partially jammed door to retrieve my cell phone and coat. Anything else would just have to be left in the car. I was pretty sure it would be safe. I turned my phone back on and the screen lit up creating eerie shadows off the branches of the trees around me. I turned it off quickly as the shadows it created spooked me. Stop being such a pussy I thought and clicked the phone back on. I wanted to call 911 for someone to come and get me out of there, but there was no cell service. How the hell I thought, is it possible that in 2021 there are still areas where you can't make a phone call? It was dark and I was feeling the increasing cold penetrating my wet pants and shoes. I was starting to feel the aches too from being thrown around in the car as it rolled down into the ravine. It was now or never, if I didn't make it up the hill now I thought I might never.

For every foot I managed to climb up, I slid down two. Every time I slid, a rock would bang my now freezing fingers. The cuts they caused oozed a little blood which mixed with the mud and made it harder to get a grip on something, anything, with which I could pull myself up. My dress shoes were worthless in getting a toehold.

Eventually I made it back up the road but by now it too was dark, ink black dark. There were no lights on the back roads. The winds had picked up too and the temperature had dropped considerably. Through the canopy of trees, I could see that the sky was full of large billowing clouds that passed quickly in front of the moon making the road alternately eerily light and then dark again. The stars as they showed themselves between the clouds twinkled high up in the heavens. Rising up slightly off to my right was the moon. A full moon. The icy blue light playing hide and seek with the tree branches creating long dancing shadows on the roadway. I never felt so lonely, a deep loneliness that dug right down deep into my soul.

I felt more than saw a movement off to the far side of the road. I turned my head quickly and saw my owl again, sitting among the branches watching me. This time though he felt less menacing. I wasn't sure if I should stand there and wait for a car or keep moving.

A rush of wind and again I saw the shadow of the owl flying very slowly down the shoulder of the road. I followed it with a slight limp in my walk. The owl landed again in a tree and watched me. This time the tree he was in was next to a dirt pathway, off to the side of the road. Not quite a side road but wider than a trail. The owl was compelling me to take the pathway. I was in a daze. Though I continued to limp, the soreness I'd felt earlier had dissipated and no longer did I feel the sharp biting cold of earlier. I left the roadway and walked onto the pathway. I thought I saw the owl nod towards me. He then took off. His large wingspan grabbed the cold dark air as he flew down the pathway. He turned and soared up and away into the night sky and out of my view.

I continued walking down the pathway, deeper into the woods. My feet moved but my brain apparently had no say in the matter. Every few minutes I would sense the movement of the owl and see the dark figure leading me ahead. The moon was higher in the sky now and the shadows it created through the trees shortened. It felt like I was walking through a gauntlet.

At long last I reached a clearing in the woods. I was no longer cold nor aching, but I was desperately tired. I sat down near the edge of the trees and within moments my owl landed in a tree next to me. Its large black eyes blinked every few moments and I felt calm, at peace. The owl had guided me to this place. I didn't know where I was, or if I even was anymore. I was weightless and sleepy. I felt the owl fly away, but no longer did I see him, nor did I see anything else, anymore.

Some Native American cultures believe that the owl is a guardian of sacred knowledge and secrets of the afterlife. Some believe that an owl accompanies the dead in their journey to the afterlife. Donadaghovi (Cherokee “Till we meet again”)