The lonely drifter

20.03.2032

Another boring Saturday.

Today is cold. Colder than before. It has been a while since I last wrote I couldn’t find a pen that would work. I don’t know why I bother really. If I had just gave up when I was kicked out, life would have been easier. No one warns you that living on the streets is so… cold. In all ways. People stopped looking at me, instead they look through me. I used to have things. Not just somewhere to live, but interests, hobbies, things. Now it’s just me, my change of clothes, whatever change I find for food and this damn diary.

21.03.2032

omg.

I hate her. I really truly hate her. She’s so…pretentious. She comes every Sunday. I can hear her stupid heels from a mile off. She comes to the same shop, for the same crappy bottle of wine, every weekend like clockwork. Sometimes she’ll come by on Wednesdays with her stupid boyfriend. That’s when she the worst, when she’s with him she’ll talk about me as if I’m not even a real person. Talking about how I probably just do drugs with whatever money people are stupid enough to give me. Such bullshit. I didn’t ask to be homeless. I know it’s wrong and I’d never harm anyone. But that heart shaped locket around her neck seems as though it could be worth something. Maybe not much, but enough for a room for a night. I wouldn’t go as far as killing her for it. But hitting her around the head wouldn’t exactly be a horrific thought, maybe if she weren’t so damn rude, I wouldn’t have even considered the idea. She probably only has it to feel like she’d better than everyone else.

29.03.2032

This week has been weird. I don’t know how to explain it. Just everyone seems a little… panicked? I grabbed a newspaper out of a bin yesterday and saw that Ireland is having some sort of problem with the government. I don’t know. Its far from me, so kind of not my problem. I have other things to figure out.

31.03.2032

Okay, well now something is definitely going on. I heard screams, not fun screams. But, like, well maybe someone was getting hurt. I don’t know. My everyday is filled with the same feeling. So, it’s not that I don’t care, it’s just, maybe someone’s getting some sort of karmic retribution. Either way I think I’m going to move off into the countryside, I’m not sure when but this city is just manic right now. Everyone’s rushing and falling over each other.

06.04.2032

I haven’t seen heels since the 21st. I left for the countryside yesterday. She has been coming to the shop every weekend for as long as I had been out there. Yet no sign of her for two weeks. Matter of fact, there’s barely been signs of any sane person recently. Everyone’s been on autopilot, manic and scared. Normally I wouldn’t let their reality and my reality overlap as they are so very far apart. But something was off, and it didn’t feel right. Either way I’ve spent a couple of days travelling. Before I left, I made sure I found as many pens as possible. This stupid diary is the only thing I have to keep myself sane anymore. The only time I get to talk to anyone I suppose.

The country is static. Its silence is somewhere between blissful and horrific. I managed to bring enough food for a couple of days. I’m hoping to find a village out here somewhere. If not, I’m sure I passed an apple orchid a few miles back. Maybe I should turn around now. But the weather in that direction has looked awful. Anyway, for tonight I’ve found an empty field with some trees on a hill for shelter. Also means I can keep an eye out for anyone coming my way.

08.04.2032

The bad weather in the distance doesn’t just seem to be rain clouds. Its too dark, too thick. Like a really heavy fog. Its in the valley at the moment, just not in the air, but sort of travelling from the ground, its about 20 foot tall. Clouds don’t settle like that right?

12.04.2032

I moved on from the hill, found a small village. But no one was here. And I know I know; villages are small and rarely packed with people compared to the city BUT I have been here for 2 days and not seen a single person. A few of the places had boarded up windows but I mean probably abandoned right. The shop back door was open. I went in and shouted to see if anyone was there and got no response. I mean this place was left. I’m sure a few others had raided it before I got there as the shelves were sort of empty already. Whilst not being the stealing type, I needed food. Real food. So, I took what I could. I packed my bag until it was almost too heavy to carry. I also ate when I was there until I was full. I did think about just staying there, but shop owners have to come back eventually, right? And I’m not taking the blame for stealing everything else that was missing.

15.04.2032

I went through another village today, unlike the last one this one had people. Not outside their homes though. I just happened to see them peaking out their windows as if they were waiting on someone to come by. I figured since this place had people it wouldn’t be a bad idea to stay close by. Whilst my own company is all I had; I miss the buzz of other people nearby. It brings me some kind of comfort. Anyway, I found this abandon farm building up on a hill about a 10-minute walk away from the valley. I’m setting up base here for now. No farmers have been here in a while I don’t think as there is several leaks in the ceiling that would have needed repairing if it were being used.

16.04.2032

Last night was awful. The sun is only just coming up from the day. I don’t know what the hell kind of village this is, but all last night was filled with screams. I found part of the barn that was sort of like a hiding space. It sounds so dumb now I think of it. A grown man that has lived on the streets of London for best part of a year, being scared half to death by a few village people. But they were screaming. Top of their lungs. Screaming. At one point I could have sworn they were hunting me down. There was definitely a couple of people near the barn. Even opened the barn door. I say opened. They near enough pulled it off the hinges on one side. It sounds dumb that I hid. But I’m pretty sure it’s the smartest thing I’ve done in a while.

I finally felt brave enough to venture outside once it got lighter. The fog that has been following me in the distance is finally gone past. Its now ahead of me and I think maybe it is travelling further away. I’m not really sure. At some point I need to get some more food. But not a single part of me wants to go into the damn satanic crazy village.

20.04.2032

I don’t know where to start. I went into the village. I don’t know what the hell they did. But I’m pretty sure the police should be called. No one there is alive? There’re quite literally body parts scattered everywhere. I’m not even entirely sure that this many people were living in this town to begin with. Doors on houses have been forced open. And I’ve searched the whole town to see if there was anyone that could be saved. Not a single human left. I don’t know if this is an axe killing group. But not one body is still intact. I mean, each one torn limb from limb. I’m so glad I hid. It had to of been whatever did this that was by the barn last night. I’m moving on. Either they come back and kill me as well, or the police show up and blame me for it all. Not a chance am I sticking around. My plan is to find as much food and supplies I can from this place and leave.

29.04.2032

I have travelled far at this point; I’m also convinced everyone has simply fell off the planet. I haven’t seen a human since that crazy village. Not a clue where I am now. Matter of fact I caught up to that damn fog again. I could see it moving about a mile away before the sun went down. Either way I’ve set up camp by some bushes. Sort of hiding in them. Its like I feel I’m still being followed by the axe murderers.

30.04.2032

Note to self: avoid that damn fog. I don’t know what it is, but no fog has ever felt like that. I was walking this morning and realised I had now fully caught up on it. Time for me to overtake it, like it had me in that village before. Within seconds of walking into it I had to run back out. It had a smell. Sort of like burning rubber and overheating mechanics. It was dense and heavy to breath. I’m pretty sure some of it is still clinging to the inside of my lungs. Either way I ran out of it and got as far away as I could from it. I think from now I will just travel behind it, until it passes the next town. I need more food supplies, but not urgent enough to travel through it.

06.05.2032

Something is inside that ‘fog’. I followed it all the way until the next village. Close enough to still see it, but far enough to keep out of that damn smell and to be able to see which direction it is travelling. It got to what I assumed is the next village last night. And that’s when I heard it all over again. This time was worse. It was screams of terror. It lasted for what felt like hours. Maybe more people this time. It was intense. I hid again. I went further back into a wooded area and found a hollowed-out tree. I stayed there until this morning. I’m going to wait for the fog to move on before I go to explore.

08.05.2032

Not a single living being left behind. Arms, legs, and decapitated heads are everywhere. It’s the ‘fog’. It must be whatever that is. Maybe if I could figure how to breathe in that stuff, I could try to see whatever the hell was doing this. Its not the fog itself, it can’t be. Because I have been inside it and whilst it took days for me to feel like I could breathe again. I’m very much still alive and have my body parts still together, unlike the rest of these poor souls. I think my plan is to raid this village. Take everything that may help me into the ‘fog’. I also need to get food. But now that seems like the least of my worries.

10.05.2032

I think I did it. I found a bunch of stuff in the doctors’ office that may help me breathe in that sickly stuff. Tomorrow I will set off to explore what it is that is killing everyone. Its mass destruction has taken out hundreds at this point. I have no home and no one expecting me to go back. Maybe if I can help solve this, I can finally have a home and life again. I mean it's not like anyone else is rushing to save the day.