The King and The P.I.

I was in my office getting ready for my next case, doing some research. Theoretically, it shouldn’t be hard to find Gerard. The Mansolins were the only raccoons on Kaglesh and they weren’t even fully raccoons from what I’ve been reading. Realistically, Kaglesh is a big place and there are a lot of places a small raccoon can hide in.

A sweeping chime caught my attention from the records I was looking at. I turned and headed to the table where my crystal ball sat. In its reflection, I can see a blurry image of my creator—my mother — the only human to ever step foot in Kaglesh. I swiped at the crystal ball and Zelda’s face appeared bright and cheery. Still such a peculiar name. She says, her parents were infatuated with a video game by the name of ‘Legend of Zelda’. I still don’t know what a video game is, and she refuses to explain it any further.

“Creator.” I simply said, going back to the records.

“I told you to stop calling me that.” I could hear her eyes rolling behind me.

“Sorry. Slipped my mind after a couple of decades apart.” I glanced over my shoulder. “Why the sudden call?”

“Well, it’s been 2 decades since we’ve spoken, even longer since we’ve been in the same room. I was just thinking you could come by the castle. We could have some lunch.” I could hear the hope in her voice. “What do you say?”

I sighed. I feel bad. She literally brought me to life. Having lunch with her is the least I could do. “Would love to Zelda, but I just got a new case. Missing raccoon.”

“Oh, fun! Which one?” Overzealous curiosity overpowered her disappointment.

“Gerard Mansolin.” I honked softly, another record flying off the shelf and landing in front of me. “His brothers and mother came for help.” I sighed, throwing the records back. These were no help. They were decades old, and they hardly mentioned the Mansolins.

“Oh, those little kobolds, always on the run.” Zelda mused to herself, clearly amused with the case.

I turned back to the crystal ball and waddled over, giving her my undivided attention. “Kobolds? I’ve never heard of such a creature. What are they?”

“I’m not sure what the Kagleshi call them, but they remind me of kobolds. Kobolds come from German folklore…”

“German?” I interrupted, tilting my head in confusion.

“A country on Earth.” A twinge of sadness laced her words as she answered.

“Your old home planet.” I said softly. Zelda doesn’t speak often of her home planet, but when she does, it is clear how much she misses it.

“Yes, but not the point. In the folklore, they’re household spirits, or cave spirits, or mine spirits. Depends on who you talk to. Some Germans say sometimes they frighten unfaithful wives, and some say sometimes they see the secret sins of the clergy. However, they’re all mischievous if they’re mistreated or forgotten and moody and foul when they’ve gone hungry. They’re mostly household spirits they help when they aren’t scheming.”

“Hm, I did not think the Mansolins were like that.” They were worried, nervous even, but mischievous? Foul? Not at all.

“Of course they’re not. I created their ancestors before I created you. I just messed up. I wanted to recreate my pet raccoon from back home, but I turned my back on the cauldron for a minute and a kobold passed through but was curious about the cauldron and slipped into it. The first one was more kobold than raccoon. The second was a raccoon, but not quite right.”

“What do you mean?”

“My creature creation is not the best. Best example is you. Geese aren’t supposed to do magic or speak.” She paused, tilting her head as she observed me. “Or have a mustache and vision problems.” I huffed. Zelda gave me an amused smile. “So, when this raccoon looked more like a raccoon, but could speak and have feelings of its own. I knew I messed up somewhere. Then raccoon 1 and raccoon 2 started…mating and their offspring, and offspring’s offspring mellowed out over the years.”

“Okay, so, where do you suggest I look?”

“Anywhere there’s food. That’s their main motivation. I’m sure The Mansolin’s gave you his last location. Start there, then just look for any place that might have food.”

I hummed as I turned to face the map of Kaglesh that adorned my western wall. “That does not make things easy.” I turned back to the crystal ball.

“P.Is never have an easy job, but you’re good at yours. Why else would the King have you, personally, looking for his wife?” she questioned, looking quite proud.

I turned my head again, ashamed. “I ask myself that same question every day.” I mumble to myself. It wasn’t that I wasn’t good at my job. I’m very good at my job. I do whatever it takes to get the job done, but even Zelda wouldn’t understand the secret I keep.

“What was that?” she asked, her head tilting to the side.

“Nothing. I should go. Long flight ahead of me.”

“Oh yeah, of course. Call me back when you get a chance.” A small smile graces her face. One that hides the disappointment. I feel bad, but it’s not my secret to tell. Not yet anyway.

“I will, Zelda. Be good. Be safe. Be careful.”

“I will, Matt. Be good. Be safe. Be careful.” I nodded and swiped my wing across the crystal ball again. Zelda’s face disappeared just as quickly as it appeared. I sighed again. She’ll understand when the truth is revealed. If it’s ever revealed. I turned back to my desk and pulled on my coat. I pocketed my knife, journal, and pen. I fixed my monocle and put on my hat. I honked the lights dimming and pressed my wing lightly to the picture of Mylan and I. Honking sadly, I turned and left my office. Shutting the door behind me, I honked at the sign.

Out On Business

For Further Inquiries

Contact Zelda Kirkland

I turned back to the open space in front of my office and home. I took off running, flapping my wings, letting the slight wind pick up under me and took to the skies towards Krismaris’s farm. I took the long flight to think back on when all the secrecy started.