The Fridge That Grew Legs

On Wednesday, the refrigerator left. Just up and left. Just like that.

Maybe it got fed up with the forgotten tupperware, and didn't want to make friends with the new lifeforms growing inside it. It unfolded long, sturdy legs that Janice had never even known were there, stepped daintily out of the open door and down the road. It went at a steady pace, with confidence and purpose, as if it had always known how, but had only just remembered it had an appointment and mustn't be late.

"Hey!" Janice called after it. The fridge ignored her.

There was a great hole in the kitchen where the fridge used to be. Janice found it a bit unnerving, and not just because she had to drink her tea black and eat her cornflakes dry.

She bought a new bottle of milk, but it spoiled instantly, as if in protest.

By Friday, the washing machine followed, and Janice was beginning to suspect the microwave had plans in a similar direction.

Her neighbour, Jasper, nodded at her over the fence. Janice wondered if he still had all his household appliances. This was not a euphemism for being sane, but could work very nicely as one.

As it turned out, Jasper did in fact still have his dishwasher and clothes dryer and vacuum cleaner, but he was as mad as a bag of spoons. He looked it, too, with all that hair sticking out in all directions, all over his head and face.

Jasper's peculiar madness was this: he was convinced there would be a robot uprising (possibly orchestrated by the gubmint) and he didn't want his own refrigerator to turn on him. For this reason, he owned rather ancient appliances, believing them to be better made and outside gubmint control.

By Tuesday, several Roombas were making a break for freedom, tootling in a determined fashion along Main Street. Jasper watched from his front porch with a wise nod.

The Garrison's and the Brady's both had front doors hanging off their hinges, and the family Flagg on the far end had their chest freezer escape from the garage.

Janice glared at the toaster. "Don't you even think about it."

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Thank you for reading.