The Blue Raincoat

I let her walk home alone that day. Not a day passes by that I don't regret that choice. By her age my parents had given me far more freedom than I had graced upon her. It was less then a ten minute walk for her little legs from our cozy house and the school. She only would have to cross two stop signs and there were many locally owned store fronts on the way and so I told myself she wouldn't be alone. I was a single mother, her father left before she was even born and now she's eight years old. A little lady. Every morning I’d walk her to school and go to work, waitressing breakfast at a tiny diner on the corner of Main Street. Then after I clean houses with my neighbor Gilda, she would usually drop me off to pick my daughter up at the school but, since I let her have this bit of freedom I was able to get home and start supper sooner.

She should’ve been home, it's twenty minutes past. I turned supper off and made the way to the school. She’s not there. It’s more than just panic that’s sending waves through my body I am furious. I ran back home and she wasn’t there either. I had to make the call to local police. I had to sit when they came, I was beside myself. This isn’t an accident. Something happened to my daughter. Someone took her. Anything past that I was unable to and did not want in my head. It was all business, they started looking immediately. They asked me for pictures, what she was wearing when I dropped her off and our routine. They could barely make out what I was saying between my sobbing. “Blue raincoat!” I yelled so loud. “She kept telling me it was going to rain and I couldn’t convince her it was going to be sunny all day, and her backpack. Her backpack it was floral, so colorful like her”, I was muttering. One officer stayed with me in case anyone called. I don’t believe they felt I was stable to remain there by myself. I had no one. Only her, it was just us. She was my life and my reason for living, I know a kid shouldn’t have that thrust on them, knowing that but everything I did was for her. She made me want to be a better person. The officer left in charge of me was a rookie, only a few years experience I gathered. He wasn’t tainted by the horrors of everyday policing. He took off his hat and addressed me “Mam, they’ll find her. You’ll see, everything will be alright.” My phone still has not made a sound, it’s been four hours and the sun is setting. The time passing, every tick is a stab. Why haven’t they found my baby? I heard sirens and the lights are flashing through my front window. I jumped up so fast and ran to the door to look. There’s two officers, and not my baby. One shakes their head, I don’t know if it’s because they didn’t find her or that they did and it’s not good. I look back and forth between them and from the top of my lungs “what do you mean?!!”, one of them pipes, “ just wait a minute mam, we are still looking. It’s gettin’ dark but we set up perimeters and our lights are on. We just can’t go into the fields until sunrise”. I can’t understand what they mean by fields, why would she be that far? The same officer takes his hat off before he acknowledged my puzzled look saying, “We had a blood hound sniff the trail from the school to your house, the trail died as if she got into a car. A couple shopkeepers in the area said they may have saw her. There was a tan brown sedan parked in the area at the time, we are still waiting to do more interviews. Would she get into a car? Does a vehicle like that sound familiar?". Hearing what he says and listening was too hard for me right now. I’m emotionally exhausted. There’s no more information I can give because I don't know anything. The officer with me went to the other two outside as I went back in and landed on the couch. I felt guilty for being tired but my eyes welled shut from the tears and I fell asleep, they'll find her and my baby will be here when I wake up. They have to find her.

Sirens startled me awake, my guardian got up quick and ran to the door and out. He must've covered me with a blanket, the sun is so bright through the windows. I wonder what time it is, do I call in to work? Out the window two men emerge from an unmarked car and greet the rookie. They are in plainclothes and all the sudden my face is burning again from all the tears. One of the men is carrying a big brown paper grocery bag up inside. "Miss. Jones, I'm Detective Perry and this is my partner Detective Samuel, may we sit down?". I motion to the twin recliners knowing if I speak I will start to cry again. Detectives Perry and Samuel take a seat and Perry begins to consult me, "We still have been unable to locate your daughter, as soon as the sun was up we resumed our search, all night we had roadblocks in place. This morning however a farmer getting his maize of corn ready for Halloween had found something. A backpack, it matches the description you gave us but we need you to verify with you." He pulled out a floral backpack from the brown paper bag, it was hers. Her name on a patch I had sewn on the pack. I wanted to touch it to hold it so bad but I knew I wouldn't want to jeopardize any chance of finding out who took her. Samuel got up and made Perry put the backpack away, he knew. We all knew. Someone took her. Perry left the house and got into the unmarked car, I could hear radio chatter but I couldn't make it out. Detective Samuel trying to interrupt the chatter said "We are going to find her, I promise Miss. Jones. I am relieving Officer Taylor and we will have another officer come to your house. Right now you need to remain home, we know without a doubt someone took her and we don't know if they will try to call. We have been in touch with the diner as well as your neighbor. Do not worry about a paycheck right now, we just need to remain focused on finding your daughter". With that I was left alone. I showered and I tried to make breakfast, but I couldn't eat it.

I waited all day to hear something, to be asked something that could help. Nothing. The officer left with me for the day didn't offer any conversation or reassurance. No peace of mind and no insight, he sat and read his paper all day. It was now 7:00 PM and I started drinking, half into a bottle of rye and shelving some of my emotions for now. It hurt, the pain it's indescribable. The next three days, the two officers rotated 11AM - 7PM, 7PM - 11AM. Officer Taylor was compassionate and kind and he wanted so badly to be out looking. It was as if he felt he was the only competent one to find her. After the three days had gone by Detectives Perry and Samuel came to see me. I let them in and they took the same seats, Perry began "We still don't know where she is, I have to be honest Miss. Jones with my experience this does not look good. I know no mother wants to hear that, we are not giving up yet but we have to approach this in a way that I don't think we are going to find her alive". I'm numb. Samuel advises me the officers will not be here anymore but if there are any calls he instructs me to call him and he gives me his card. He says my work has given the whole week off and that it would be a solid idea to talk to someone, all this is just words floating above me.

The next day it felt as if I spent the whole day on the couch staring at the phone, I didn't even have the television on because I didn't want to risk missing the ringing. I couldn't eat or sleep. That night after the officers were dismissed, I hear my doorbell it's 7PM and I'm worried it's the detectives. I open the door quickly, Taylor is at my door in plainclothes. He has a paper bag in is arms, but I can see its full of groceries jutting from the top. "I know I should've called first but I knew you would've said no, I can leave them here or if you need help. I just couldn't leave you like that, the way you were. I'm sorry I can go, I'll just leave this here". Without saying a word I hugged him and the bag between us. No one had come, no one knew how to help. I let him in and he began to help me put the stuff away in silence. He bought some tv dinners and a 6 pack of beer thinking I really should eat something. He was on his way out when I asked him to stay. Turning he said "I'd be happy too but don't feel obliged just because I brought you some groceries Miss. Jones". "Call me Amy, and please even if we don't talk it would help to have someone here", I said quietly. I took his coat and hung it in the hallway closet.

We sat eating the Swanson dinners, but I haven't been able to taste anything. During our sitting he told me they had a guy in mind, possibly but he didn't want to go further into detail. After I begged and cried some, he took a deep breath, sighed and poured out everything. "The bloodhound stopped in front of the Meat Market that Mr. Holloway owns, his son Nick works for him and he also drives a tan-brown sedan. Nick left work at the same time your daughter was walking home. Mr. Holloway told us he didn't see Nick get in his car just heard the bell as he left. After we set up the roadblocks and were accounting the names of people going in and out, Nicks name showed up on the list of the same perimeter the backpack was found. His name was never recorded as leaving only coming back. He was brought in the next day along with a couple other people we didn't have a good feeling about and everyone except him had someone to verify where they were. Nick had no explanation as to why he was there or who he was with, said simply he was taking a drive. Detective Perry and Samuel they are now onto him and asked to look at his vehicle. He said it wasn't a crime to take a drive and the answer was no. Again I'm being honest Miss. Jones I mean Amy, if we don't find something soon he will torch that vehicle. I just think he did something to her and again I feel like there's not a damn thing I can do". Hearing all this like a confession made me feel sick. That asshole took my daughter but I can't force myself to see what he did to her. Taylor tells me he should go now, and apologizes for not letting me hang onto whatever little hope I had left. He retrieves his jacket from the closet, "Miss. Amy, you said your daughter was wearing a blue raincoat but there's one here. Were you mistaken?". I asked him if Taylor has any children, he nodded no. "I sometimes buy two of the same item when it's a sale, get the next size up if they really like it. She really liked that coat, that one in there is the size up, the tags should still be on", I said as I took a swig of the last beer. He shut the closet door and was in a hurry. "Miss. Jones don't tell anyone about that jacket in there. Including detectives Samuel and Perry. You understand? I'll be by in the morning, I've got an idea". I nodded and he ran into the night.

I hear pounding on my front door its practically the middle of the night. "Amy, its Taylor", a hushed voice in a hurry says as I approach the door. I open it. He carrying a bag of garbage in his hands. "Let me in", I open the door wide and I'm tired. "If there was a chance, I'm not saying for sure that we can find your daughter you would do anything right?" Taylor is out of breath. I immediately almost cut him off "Of course, I would do anything what the hell is this about?". "The jacket, in the closet, can I have it? The less you know the better, I don't have much time". I give him the jacket and he rips off the tags, opens the bag of garbage and puts it in. "What the fuck are you doing?!!" I yelled at him. "Keep your voice down, it's garbage from Nick's House, it's pick up day. There's a friend I know, goes lookin' for cans down that street in about an hour. I putting the garbage back, going to get back in my car. When I see the friend, I usually give him a couple quarters for a coffee and I'll make sure he gets to Nicks garbage I'll tell him I saw him throw some bottles in there and mention your daughter again. I'll make sure he remember the blue raincoat." His voice was smoldering, "He'll call it in when I'm showing up and that will give some probable cause to search and to question him about it. Maybe we can get your daughter back". As quick as he came he was out the door again.

I waited for what seemed like forever, it was almost 7PM when a loud knock at my door startled me. No lights but I looked out and saw the two Detectives, I already knew. I opened the door, let them in and they resumed the familiar seating arrangements. Samuel began softly, "Miss Jones, I regret to inform you but we found your daughter. We need identification but if you can't do it we understand, we can do it by photo or her dental". Perry interrupted "Again we are sorry, this is hard to come her and tell you. We caught the son of bitch, and he gave a full confession. You won't have to know what happened if you don't want to. It was hard enough for us to be in the same room". He asked me if I wanted to see her tonight and that they could take me, and tomorrow she would be ready if I wanted to begin making arrangements. I don't remember much of that night but I went with both detectives. I saw my daughter and I tried really hard to picture her as she was. Not an empty shell of a little girl I was not longer able to hold and dance with. Make up scary stories under a sheet in her bed with a flashlight. He had taken my whole future I had planned for us. It was there and then like a puff of smoke it blew away. You never ever really recover from a loss like this. Everything is still raw and real all the time, still vivid. The only thing I ever really look forward to is joining her, half of me is already with her. Officer Taylor still comes by every so often to check in, I think he thinks to himself sometimes maybe it would've been better for me if they didn't find her. That way I wouldn't be tormented with having to see her that way. It was shortly after they found her he told me they got a call from the same farmer about a blue raincoat. He told me he went and picked it up from the farmer and swapped out the one that he put in evidence. It was a week after that, he showed up at my door with a brown bag. Inside was my daughters blue raincoat, the one he used. He had it cleaned professionally in a neighboring city and asked me if I wanted to hang it back up. I did, I look at it everyday and I remember how beautiful my angel was and is.

Although this story is fictional and any similarities are purely coincidental I urge any reader who is knowledgeable about a crime or missing persons to please contact your local policing agency or contact http://www.missingkids.ca or http://www.crimestoppers.ca to make a report. I also encourage any tips being made to this story to please reconsider and donate to crime prevention and awareness charities. Thank you.