Tales from Terra

Chapter One

Nobody can hear a scream in the vacuum of space, or so they say. It’s amazing what you will try when you’re desperate though, or bored.

In the beginning, it was boredom. Something to break the endless monotony of loneliness, trying to pretend the hubris that bought her here, out to the black, was just another shadow in the dark. It had seemed like an easy mission, charting the effects of long-term low gravity on the human body alongside analysis of the lack of human contact on the psyche, nothing to an astrogator with her eyes set on being the pilot of the first crewed mission out of the Sol system. Merely a test, a crucible, to convince her superiors that she was indeed the best choice to captain the UESF Revelation and look beyond what was known and into the starry sea of possibility.

The day started with the same old tired routine; a half bounce out of bed thanks to the artificial semi-gravity provided by her pod shortly after the lights flickered to life indicating another simulated dawn. A quick freshen up in the shower unit, making sure each droplet was wicked away from her body before slipping into a soft blue flight suit. The shower was a pale comparison to the waterfall shower she loved so much in her apartment back home. Here there was barely a wet mist, enough to provide a semblance of cleanliness and stave off the dry skin that often came with living in a place with recycled air for extended periods. Breakfast was always the same boring dried protein and fibre cereal bar, washed down with filtered water that never lost the acerbic edge of chlorine no matter how many times it went through the filtration systems. Always the knowledge this fluid had cycled her body a few days before. Waste not, want not. Words to live by in a place where there was no forgiveness for those who wasted limited resources.

The pod was not a spacious place but still provided enough space to live somewhat comfortably on the outskirts of humanity. The sleeping quarters led to the circular central living area where a fold-out table and chair gave her a small office space that doubled as a place to eat meals. Through a small passage above lay a small lab and hydroponics unit, below lay a storage area and the airlock with her pressurized suit ready for any outside repairs to the spacecraft. She was expected to be both focused and autonomous, upholding the motto printed above the United Earth Space Fleet logo on each item of clothing Supre Se, Astra Exspectant – Beyond Self, The Stars Await. She still felt the same small thrill reading her name printed so neatly below the entwined silver leaves and globe, Eva Wendell, as she did the day her name was deemed worthy from the pool of thousands of pilots who had applied to escape the crowded shores of the Americas. Colony life on Luna or Mars had not been enough. It was the universe or nothing.

The days droned on, alternating between analyzing information collected by the sensors scanning the airless space surrounding the pod and researching anything and everything she could to deepen her knowledge of the solar navigation charts extending to sector seven towards Sirius. The hamster wheel passage of time was broken only by another meal of yet more dried consumables rehydrated into an unappetizing mush with more bitter water. Humankind could live longer in space than ever before and yet no one had figured out a better way to provide sustenance than MRE rations. There were rumors that the colony ships would be installed with some sort of self-sustaining unit that would at least provide a degree of variety including vegetables grown on the ship, but these luxuries were not considered needful whilst evaluating the pilots. Instead, the drabness of the food was a test by itself, how she longed for the crisp crunch of a carrot, the fresh snap of a lettuce leaf pulled from its green heart.

One of the hardest parts of the training schedule had been learning to endure the unrelenting predictability that long-term space travel was known for. So many people assumed it was exciting, always something happening, but the reality was akin to an office job with none of the perks of fresh air breaks or the wind on her face. Sometimes she would reverse one of the extractor fans and stand in the breeze, eyes closed, imagining herself standing on the seashore, the sun on her face, the heavy sea scent filling her nostrils with the sweet smells of home. On clear nights on Terra, she would gaze across the deep and set her eyes upon the bejewelled sky above, wishing herself closer to those gloriously unknown pinpricks of light, longing to know the unknowable, the knowledge of other worlds not forbidden but simply out of reach. When she was chosen for the Pathfinder missions, she felt a step closer to destiny, closer to silencing the longing within, that wanderlust that never ceased to hum quietly at the back of her mind.

In her downtime, she was supposed to ease off from the academic study and refresh her mind with the entertainment packages provided to stimulate her mind, but she often ignored this part of the mission, choosing instead to stare into the void beyond Luna which held her heart. Wishing the days away, all three hundred and sixty-four of them, knowing each took her closer to her ultimate prize and glory. When the lights began to dim to twilight, she would upload the day’s data including a video diary charting her mental state and enduring suitability for a mission where the requirements revolved around the ability to stay mentally sharp and sane whilst others dreamt away the miles in the cryo chambers, trusting her to guide them to the new, the unfamiliar, the thrill of discovering a fresh start for humanity as they outgrew their home planet and colonies. To take that next giant leap into the stellar beyond.

For nine months each day passed like the last, broken only by the knowledge that every waking was one day less in this sterile tube floating in it’s black womb between Terra and Luna. As the time passed, her mind created its own distractions in those long hours, often amusing herself with the odd primal scream to remind herself of what a voice sounded like that was not the tin can reproduction of the film packages pre-selected for her to watch. She had never been a fan of romance, yet someone assumed that being a woman, all she would need was soppy tearjerkers to stay emotionally happy. Given the choice, she would have filled the reels full of space horrors and disaster films, but she had worried this would have been seen by her superiors as psychologically inappropriate. A blemish against her aspirations. She wished now she had been more forthcoming as honestly, each watch bought her closer to ejecting the hard copies out of the airlock. Thinking of the airlock bought her mind back to the present, and she cast a glance out of the reinforced porthole towards Terra, the sight causing her to catch her breath, hand halfway to her mouth, as she realized days had passed since the last time she had looked towards home.

She faced the shadow side, night embracing the Earth like a shroud, and instead of seeing the glow of the continents scattered beneath her feet, a void as deep as the one behind her stared back, the only definition the highlight at its furthest edge as the racing dawn illuminated the landmass on the east of the Americas. Dread spread a cold chill through her body as she pushed off as hard as she could towards the emergency panel, grasping for the switch that promised a nebulous contact with home.

Come in Houston, this is Icarus 4, confirm contact, over.

UESF Command, this is Icarus 4, confirm contact, over.

JPL Command, this is Icarus 4, confirm contact, over.

Eva cycled through the emergency channels, trying each of the red alert protocols as she had been taught only to be greeted by the screech of radio static answering her own shaken pleas begging for a voice from a world gone dark.