Swamp

Evening has just started to fade into dusk when Eliza Rivers, our party's druid, takes the seat beside me in the front of the cart. I drive us left off of Portsburg-Granitton Turnpike and head south into the Six Stream Swamp.

A swarm of tiny pink lights greets us and flits around the cart in a friendly way. They seem to indicate that a westward turn onto a broad, smooth path would be our best choice.

(Catch up on installments 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5.)

"Ignore them, Red," Eliza tells me. "Willowfetches. They'll lead you to a carnivorous tree if you let them. Go straight on."

The phrase "carnivorous tree" seems to have caught my companions' attention. Marion Fletcher the ranger and Isobel Hansom the barbarian both open their eyes and sit up. Alice Cross the paladin allows her conversation with young Princess Blanche to peter out.

Fredericia Forestay taps my arm and gestures with her harmonica. Since a former friend betrayed the bard and magically stole her voice, Fredericia hasn't been able to speak or sing. Nevertheless, she can still inspire us to improved competence with her music.

I tell her, "I think we may be safer if we're quiet for now. Eliza?"

Eliza nods. "I'd love to tell you we're safe in my home swamp. But, the Fairy Godmother does have sizable bounties on our heads."

Fredericia acquiesces. She settles back down in the back of the cart.

Shadows grow longer as we proceed into the swamp depths, and I eventually realize that several trees around us are dotted with pale blue lights.

"Are those lightning bugs?" I ask.

"Ovid snails," Eliza explains.

A magical vine shoots out of her right hand and whips some branches overhead, raining about two dozen glowing, apricot-sized snails down on us. Alice winces and brushes the snails away from her. Marion, Isobel, and Princess Blanche each pick up and examine a snail.

Eliza explains, "Ovid snails feed off parasitic fungi which would make paramaple trees sick. Something about the chemical reaction when they digest the fungi makes them emit that blue light."

Fredericia puts a snail to her mouth and sucks the creature out of its shells, chewing with apparent delight.

"Also, they're delicious," Eliza says.

Princess Blanche makes a small sound of disgust and puts her snail down. Fredericia and Eliza each eat a few.

Isobel gives one a try and shrugs. "I could take it or leave it."

Marion says, "They're all right. I prefer the saltwater variety."

Fredericia shakes her head, points at a glowing blue snail, and gestures her approval of it.

"I may get sick," Alice admits.

Eliza takes a handful of small, fragrant leaves out of a pocket and hands them to Alice.

"What uncanny druidcraft is this?" Alice asks.

"Peppermint," Eliza says. I only hear a faint hint of annoyance in her voice. "You don't recognize the scent?"

Alice looks wary, sniffs the leaves, and tries to thank Eliza politely.

Eliza shrugs it off and turns her attention to me. "Pretty soon, we'll get to the Swampwalk. It's a network of raised paths. As the streams feeding the swamp swell or dwindle, different routes through the network are passable."

"The path effectively changes," I say.

"Yes," Eliza smiles, "But the way remains the same."

"You're speaking in riddles," I tell her.

"That's both kind of the point, and not my intention," Eliza replies. She scrunches up her brow as if realizing she's confusing herself. "At every intersection, you'll see at least one spunkie," she explains. "They're little fairies with lanterns, and their favorite beverage is human blood."

"Of course," I say dryly.

Eliza continues: "So take whichever path is not recommended by a spunkie."

I ask, "Eliza, what else in this swamp wants to eat us?"

Marion swiftly stands and nocks an arrow, aiming ahead. "Crocodile," she says.

"No, no crocodiles here," Eliza says. "There are Purple Ridge caiman, but no--"

"That is absolutely a crocodile," Marion insists. "What in the world is a saltie doing this far inland?"

Eliza and I look more carefully into the waters ahead. There is indeed a crocodile, easily twice as long as I am tall, swimming through the shallow waters with an air of intention. Our party falls completely silent. I can hear treefrogs, insects, and a strange, "Tick, tick, tick."

Fredericia taps my shoulder. I see her point at the crocodile, clap her arms together in an imitation of its jaws snapping shut, and then curl her index finger.

"It's hunting Captain Hook?" I ask.

Fredericia nods.

The crocodile does indeed continue on its way, entirely heedless of our presence. Marion returns her arrow to her quiver.

"Do you know Captain Hook?" I ask Fredericia.

She shakes her head.

"You just know about him."

She nods.

I ask, "Eliza, what are the chances Sir Walter and Lady Elizabeth have recruited pirates to smuggle for the Enchantment Liberation Front?"

Eliza sighs. "They're probably about equal to the chances that pirates are trying to collect the bounties on the Enchantment Liberation Front."

I come to the first fork in the road. Sure enough, a moth-winged fairy with a little red lantern tempts me towards the left path. I go right.

The sun fades away completely. Silver light trickles down through the foliage from the waning gibbous moon. Eliza summons a magical fire from the palm of her hand to help light our way.

I can just make out the signs of a hidden net ahead. I stop the horse.

"What is it?" Eliza asks.

"I see a trap," I say. I slide down from the cart and examine the net.

"Already? Mom and Dad must have increased the defensive perimeter."

I easily disable the trap. I drive the cart past it, stop, reset the trap, and then continue forward.

Our trek through the swamp is painstakingly slow. I ignore the inviting lights of willowfetches and spunkies. I avoid pitfalls, caltrops, and tripwires. Occasionally, Eliza has to use her magical vinewhip to encourage large caiman or sharp-clawed badgers to back away from the cart.

It's growing late. The horse is sluggish and my companions have started yawning. I almost miss the outline of a snare trap. I just barely manage to rein in the horse in time. I step down and harmlessly spring the trap.

"Red," Eliza said with an anxious pitch to her voice. "That isn't one of ours."

I examine the rope more closely and realize it exudes a faint hint of salt air. "Fredericia," I say; "Aren't these sailor knots?"

Fredericia hops down, looks, and nods her agreement.

Somewhere in the path ahead of us, an accordion starts to play. A deep baritone voice sings a shanty about "Fearless Jas. Hook," the "Greatest swordsman of the high seas."

Three men casually stroll towards us. The accordion player and a man with a sheathed cutlass wear striped shirts and bandanas. The third man wears a long black jacket with a naval cut. He has black hair and a neatly trimmed black beard, both just lightly flecked with early silver hairs. He has a hook in place of his right hand, and a mischievous smile on his face.

I can hear Eliza whisper behind me: "Why didn't anyone mention that Captain Hook is handsome?"

Fredericia whips out her harmonica and joins the accordion player's song.

The pirate with the cutlass cheers. "Ah, Blakely! Have we found friends?"

Fredericia and Blakely continue their song, not missing a note as they step together to the jig. As he plays and dances, the pirate calls out, "Captain! It's Fred! You heard me mention Fred!"

Hook laughs. "You played a fine trick on me, Blakely! You talked about a minstrel who could drink you under the table. You said nothing about a beautiful young lady or her..." His black eyes find me. "...Formidable companions."

I nod in a sign of respect, aware that this encounter could go either way.

The song ends. Fredericia and Blakely hug like old friends. In the sudden quiet, we hear the "Tick, tick, tick," again.

Hook and his men whirl around in one motion until they stand with their backs together. Blakely and the other underling hold out their cutlasses; Hook wields a rapier.

He asks, "Will I never be free of that vile beast? Be on your guards, friends of my friend's friend! I have been chased from the high seas to the depths of the Granitton Mountain by a ferocious beast with a taste for human flesh. Once this crocodile ate my hand, it developed an insatiable--"

He is interrupted by a splashing commotion which starts not far from his boots. The pirates gape with surprise as heavy tree roots twine around the crocodile, lifting and immobilizing it. The vines obey Eliza's gestures, pulling the crocodile a few feet away from the path.

"Yes!" Hook says. "Hold it still." He readies his rapier. "I will finally finish it--"

"No," Eliza interrupts him. She raises the crocodile higher. "Or at least, not yet, Mr. Friend-of-my-Friend's-Friend." She climbs down from the cart and stands beside Fredericia and me. "State your name and your business in my swamp."

"Your swamp?" Hook asks.

"My swamp!" Eliza declares. Somehow, the foliage in all directions thickens, dampening the moonlight even further.

I've got my hands on the hilts of my daggers. Alice, Isobel, and Marion all adjust their positions, preparing to jump down from the cart if necessary.

"I am called James Hook," the captain says. "My companions are William Blakely and Albert Sunshine. Our plan had been to hunt down members of the Enchantment Liberation Front and earn the bounties for their capture."

I draw my weapons. My companions follow suit, excepting Fredericia.

Hook smiles at me. "I never dreamed I'd manage to find the inimitable and highly priced Robin Wood. Aren't you supposed to be in Nottingham these days?"

I hear Alice behind me. "If Captain Hook allies himself with the bad guys, does that mean we get Pan on our--"

"DON'T SAY THAT NAME!" The urgent request comes simultaneously from the pirates, Eliza, Marion, and myself.

Instantly, two nearby spunkies start to fly upwards. Marion's keen arrow stops one, and my thrown dagger stops another.

"What?" Alice asks.

"We couldn't have them reporting back to the Tinker," I explain, retrieving my blade and Marion's ammunition.

Alice says, "But Neverland is a wealthy kingdom, and the P… the King of Neverland has so far remained neutral in our conflict."

"Neutral," Hook laughs darkly.

"The King of Neverland is neutral in everything," Eliza says. "In literally every single thing he does."

Alice objects, "But…"

"Do you know what True Neutral looks like?" I ask Alice.

Hook does not wait for her response.

"It looks like law and chaos, jumbled together. It looks like Good and Evil swirling about like the colors of the aurora effect. It looks like a king who arranges a fair trial for you, sentences you to community service to atone for your crimes of petty theft, and then cuts off your hand and feeds it to a crocodile. And while True Neutral looks like all these things, my dear Madam, it wears the face of your beloved baby brother who died in early childhood, just to hurt your heart worse."

Eliza adds, "If we are very lucky, the King of Neverland will keep far away from us."

Hook sheaths his rapier. His men follow his lead and put away their cutlasses. "Well," he says. "There are two things I value better than money, and both seem to require a change of plans."

I ask him, "And what are those two things?"

"My own blood," he says, "Which is currently at the command of this enchanting young lady." He looks right at Eliza. "And the smile of a beautiful woman."

Eliza scrutinizes Hook's face. She maintains eye contact with him as she says, "Red, I don't think he's being completely sincere."

He says, "I'm about eighty percent sincere at the moment. That's rather a lot for me."

Eliza turns to me. "What do you think?"

I say, "I think the crocodile will make a fine pet for you, Eliza. I think we outnumber these pirates. And I think they might prove useful to the Front."

I sheathe my daggers. My friends put their weapons away as well.

"Get in the cart," I say.

I climb into the driver's seat. Blakely hands Fredericia up to the back. Hook helps Eliza to her seat beside me, then climbs into a position in the back as close to Eliza as he can get. The other two men take spaces between Isobel and Marion.

I drive again, tired and more than ready for the journey to be over. Eliza releases her new reptilian friend and uses her vines to catch a fox for it to eat. The crocodile follows behind us, ticking quietly as if it had swallowed a clock.

Before long, the tall, torchlit brick wall of Salamander Fort looms ahead of us. In my bleary-eyed state, I almost think I see a disembodied smile of sharp teeth perched over the drawbridge. I blink, and it's gone. Finally, we can have a good night's sleep.