Prince Edward, Prince Edward County

The offer to clean a cottage and enjoy its amenities during the summer months is nothing to pass up on. Especially when it's located in one of the trendiest locations within which to rent property during the high season in Southern Ontario. Now make that same property owned by someone famous and I would call that the “tits'' of all offers. Smiley Spokenfork immediately accepted and made plans to gather the essentials for the trip, and she also quickly notified her boyfriend, Chad Bradstone, of the invite to the cottage. The plan consisted of her heading up to start cleaning a 2000 square foot cottage which was on the lake, not far from Picton, Ontario. The cottage was owned by Steve Anthony, who was a well-known local TV personality. Smiley didn’t have to start her work there until later that evening. Her landlord, Scout Peeples, was the one who offered her the opportunity, as this was the cottage that he had rented for himself to spend the summer, and she was his cleaner at home as well. She let Chad know the particulars and mentioned that he should wait until late that evening before heading out. If he so chose to join her. By leaving late he would be able to miss having to have any confrontation with Scout who was planning to make dinner before leaving Smiley to clean the place.

Things between Chad and Scout, to put delicately, were not on the best of terms. They had encountered several run-ins recently during which words had been traded between them. One specific event, coincidentally the most recent occurrence, resulted with Chad swearing at the Scout in the parking lot of Smiley’s apartment complex. Scout’s response was to “fake jax” on Chad as he was leaving the lot after the aforementioned exchange of non-niceties. The situation became absurd to Chad when it became glaringly apparent that Scout had beached while “faking jax”, and the struggle that resulted was the most visually humorous Chad had seen in quite some time. If you can imagine the “Kool Aid guy” falling, and not being able to get back up, perpetually rolling back and forth trying to get the momentum to finally rollover and get back up. The situation had boiled to a point where Scout had mentioned to Smiley that he did not like her having Chad around the apartment. Hence the need for the chances of encounter between Chad and Scout be reduced to whenever it was necessary.

Chad let Smiley know that he did not want to be at the cottage if Scout was going to be there and Smiley suggested that Chad just message Scout and apologise. Smiley also confirmed for Chad that if he left after 10pm that evening, he would avoid Scout as he was leaving around that time to head back to the city. Chad agreed to send an apologetic note to Scout and committed to seeing Smily sometime around midnight that evening. Chad was in the middle of selling his home, so he was busy all day with viewings booked and the cleaning and re-staging of the home that needed to occur before each visit. Since he was leaving that evening, he wanted to make sure the place was prepared for the viewings booked over the next couple of days. This way his need to remain local vanished and he could enjoy himself in cottage country.

The day went well without any major hitches, and around 10pm Chad messaged Smiley to say that he was on his way and that he had messaged Scout and apologised very nicely for any previous discontent or malfeasance. He didn’t receive any immediate response, but it wasn’t unusual for Smiley to return messages much later than received. So once the truck was packed and he had turned on all the lights for the showings, Chad pulled out of his driveway in central Durham and headed for the PEC (Prince Edward County). Chad liked to drive fast, so leaving at the late hour afforded him the ability to do so for most of the 2 hour journey to the cottage in Prince Edward. Straight east, 85% of the trip was straight highway driving with just 2 lanes and typical of the 401, with lots of semi tractor-trailers on the road. After a quick stop to fill up with gas in Cobourg, Chad put the address to the cottage in his GPS to get an ETA that he could text to Smiley. Realising that the road was surprisingly empty, Chad decided to drive at 170Km/h the remainder of the way. His GPS had his arrival time pegged for 12:15am and he figured he could shave off 15 mins at this pace.

Speeding along the 401 through Belleville right on his anticipated arrival time now of 12am on the number, Chad’s GPS announced that his exit from the highway was coming up in 2 km. That announcement immediately triggered Chad’s sense of direction as being too soon to be at the exit he had assumed would be most direct. Figuring that he was already ahead of schedule, and still having not received a response from Smiley, he decided to follow the directions of the GPS and he exited in Shannonville. Soon after his exit he realised that he was being guided through downtown residential Shannonville. A very small hamlet located 10 mins east of Belleville. Soon Chad found himself on a residential street and felt the need to stop when he spotted a home that was lit up like a house would be for Christmas, even though it was early June. As he approached the home after exiting his truck, Chad found himself staring at a couple makeshift greenhouses with rows of tables located where a driveway would normally be based on his comparison of the neighbouring homes. A sign denoted “Small pots $5, Medium $10 and Large $20.” Pre-arranged bouquets of flowers lined each table organised in the size groups outlined in the price list. Chad decided that fate as it would have it pointed him here to get Smiley some flowers as an expression of his love for her. After quickly reviewing all options he chose a medium size arrangement that contained all of Smiley’s favourite flowers and a monarch butterfly pin. He slipped $20 inside the payment box and hopped back up into his truck.

Right on time Chad pulls up to the cottage. He grabbed his overnight bag and the recently purchased flowers and headed for the deck that wrapped around the cottage. Reaching the front door, Chads puts down his bag and knocks on the window beside the door. Much to his chagrin, it was not Smiley who came to greet him at the door, it was Scout. “What are you doing here?” Scout questions Chad. “Smiley invited me”, Chad retorts. “You are not welcome here, so please exit the property before I have to call the police.” Scout snaps back. Angrily Chad grabs his overnight bag and starts heading back to his truck. Scout follows after him berating him as they go… “Are you going to threaten me again?” Chad asks Scout. Scout responds “Why do you have your gun here with you?” Laughing at the question, Chad chirps back, “If I had known you were going to be here I would have it in my hand right now.”

At that exact same moment, as he took the 2 steps from the deck down the ground, still heading to his truck, Chad tried to switch the flowers from one hand to the other in order to grab his overnight bag in a way that would allow him to fire it into the back seat of his truck. During the shuffle from hand to hand the flowers dropped to the ground and tipped over, ruining the arrangement. Chad tosses the half filled pot into the bed of his pickup truck and the remaining soil and perennials that had not just fallen on the ground spill all over the metal floor. At this moment Scout yells out “So you do have your gun and you lied, PERJURY!” Infuriated and confused at this situation that is quickly becoming as ridiculous as their last encounter, Chad throws his bag into the truck, slams the door, turns and aggressively starts heading back toward the cottage. Realising that he had obviously just pushed the wrong button with his comments, Scout turns and runs back into the house. Chad, now acting in chase mode, hurdles the two stairs and bolts for the door as well. Scout quickly enters the cottage and slams the door shut and locks it.

Chad arrives a couple seconds later and bangs on the door, this time calling out for Smiley to come talk to him. As Chad is now getting more frustrated his temper gets the better of him and he begins banging on the windows along the side of the cottage as well. Scout begins yelling about calling the cops and screams at Chad to leave the property immediately. Scout cautions Smiley about exiting the cottage as she is finally seen through the door by Chad coming up the stairs inside from the lower level of the cottage. Smiley is sufficiently confused by what she is witnessing but she shrugs off Scout and exits the cottage to see what the ridiculous situation has become between these two men from Chad’s perspective.

Smiley grabs Chad by the arm and tugs him towards the deck leading back to the parking area. “You cannot be doing this Chad, he is paying me to clean the cottage and he is my landlord. Do you want to get me kicked out of my apartment?” Chad shows Smiley the gift of flowers he so thoughtfully purchased for her on the ground and then in the back of the truck. “I bought these for you, that fucking asshole ruined them. Why is he even here? I would not have come if I had known we would have to cross paths. You confirmed this for me. What happened Smiley?” While they were discussing what had happened, Scout was already on the phone and dialled into the local police headquarters reporting what was in his opinion a trespassing situation. Smiley could hear Scout telling whichever officer that was on desk duty that night about an urgent and very likely to escalate situation that needed immediate police presence or the safety of himself and two young women could no longer be considered a certainty. Smiley walked Chad back to his truck and suggested that he just head back to the last gas station he saw on the route to the cottage which was just on the other side of the big skyway bridge. “I’ll take care of this with Scout and the police and then I will message you and head out to you so we can figure out what happens now that it seems he’s not leaving.” Chad nodded, gave her a kiss on the forehead and hopped up in his truck and took off back down the dirt path leading back to the main road.

As Chad arrived at the end of the dirt pathway he could already see down the road about 500m away the silhouette of what resembled a police cruiser. In that moment he decided the best play for him was to now wait here at the end of the property line for the police to arrive and be the one who controls the situation. So he pulled his truck around and parked on the shoulder right at the end of the dirt Narrows Lane road that led back down to the cottage. The cottage is located in Prince Edward which is a hamlet located in Prince Edward County, and when Scout dialled 911, that operator dispatched units from both the neighbouring city of Picton and the Native reserve police. After many run-ins with law enforcement over the years being a delinquent afforded Chad some experience that accompanied relationships with family members working as police officers as well. Chad was quite comfortable speaking with any cop or detective, even when his actions on the scene caused some trouble while breaking the law.

Chad puts on his hazard lights as the first of 2 police cruisers pull around and park beside and in front of his pickup truck. 4 police officers motion for Chad to turn his truck off and roll down his window. Calmly and cooly, Chad adheres to the instructions and with slow easy motions also goes into his glove box to get his insurance and ownership papers. As expected the constable that initiates the conversation opens with a brief “How are you today sir?” “I’m well officer, thank you for asking, '' Chad responds. “What seems to be the issue here tonight? We got a call about an individual driving a black truck quickly away from the property after being found trespassing by the owner.” “I am going to give you my licence, ownership papers, and proof of insurance. I came out tonight to my girlfriend. I have only been here for 15 mins. When I knocked on the door to the cottage, some weird fellow answered the door instead of my girlfriend, whose car was parked out front. I parked right beside her Volkswagen, and if you go up to the cottage yourselves you will see the flowers that I bought her on the ground right beside her Black Golf. The guy chased me off the property for no reason and I dropped the perennials on the ground hurrying back to my truck.” Chad explains further…”My girlfriend is in that cottage and its like he’s holding her hostage or something because when I knocked on the door he told me that I had no business being here and I needed to get the fuck off the property. He also told me that he had a gun and made some silly comment about me owning a gun as well. I think he’s bi-polar or something. I’m concerned about the well being of my girlfriend. I was going to call you guys once I got off the property anyway.” All 4 police officers have now heard Chad's description of the trespassing accusations. A couple of the cops had been circling Chad’s truck and using their flashlights to peak into the interior of the vehicle. They had walked the perimeter around his F150 as they listened to the account Chad was giving about the episode of ridiculousness. After a quick chat between the group of them, 2 cops head down to the cottage. The other 2 return to their cruiser and run through all the id and paperwork Chad had provided.

Chad cracks open a Gatorade while he sits in the driver seat of his truck waiting for whatever follow-up questions will result from the tandem of boys in blue and their diligent dutiful deeds now underway. After only about 5 mins, one of the officers returns with Chad’s paperwork. Always one for small talk Chad asks if he can light a cigarette and exit the vehicle. “Of course you can, as long as you don’t mind a quick pat down search?” replies the law. “Not a problem officer, I will just put my lighter and cigarettes on the dash and I’ll open the door and jump down.” Chad’s phone buzzes. “Can I get that? It could be my girlfriend.” “Bring the phone out with you, just keep your hands out and up so we can see them.” Chad complies and after a quick pat down, Chad takes a look at his phone. It’s a message from Scout however. The message is in response to the apology that Chad had written to Scout hours ago but somehow only now just read. The silliness from Scout continues and Chad reads them out loud so that the cops could hear it. “I know you are on the run now, but you cannot run forever. The police are here right now and there is nothing that can be done to save you once I speak to them. Do yourself a favour and turn yourself in.” Chad can’t help but to laugh out loud. He follows that up with “I think that man is a couple cards short of a full deck. I apologise for this wasted time during your shift tonight. You guys should be out keeping the public safe, not responding to misunderstandings between adults.”

After a couple minutes of small talk. There is a radio squawk and the all good message comes from the law enforcers down at the house. “You can head out now”, Chad is told. “Thank you very much officers”, Chad politely responds. After buckling himself back in and turning off the hazard lights, Chad manoeuvres his pickup truck back towards the skyway. He finds the gas station that Smiley told him to wait at and pulls into a corner spot highly visible from the road. Unbeknownst to Chad, Smiley was busy with the police and Scout still, more than likely trying to sanitise the lies that Scout was perpetrating. After 45 mins had passed, a car pulled up beside Chad’s truck. It was the owner of the store that was just closing in the same parking lot Chad was in. Chad explains his situation being overly honest about the need to wait for his girlfriend, and the previous run-in with the law. The now clearly Native Indian man that Chad was speaking with follows Chad’s long winded diatribe of events with a simple, but clear message: "Listening is your strongest suit, wear it everywhere you go".