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Prenoctintoxicated

Drunk Before Dark

By C. Rommial ButlerPublished 8 months ago 1 min read
4
Norm Macdonald?

Noon

Well, I guess a couple beers won't hurt. After all, the game's on in an hour, and the gang's all here, why not cop a buzz? No more than two, though. Got a whole twelve pack in the fridge, but I don't need to get carried away.

1 p.m.

Have I already finished that second beer? I guess another one or two won't hurt. Game just started! Don't wanna lose my buzz and get that shitty headache. Tommy brought a fifth of whiskey. Wonder if he'll pour me a shot?

Five Shots and Four Beers Later

Damn, this chili is awesome! Whoops, spilled some on my shirt. What's that, Terry? Yeah, I know, I know, eat it, don't wear it, and fuck you too! Haha. No, I'm fine. Just had a few beers and a couple shots. I'll be fine...

Tommy's Fifth is Empty

Damn, I nodded off! Game's over? Who won? We lost? Aw, fucking Colts, man, can't get their shit together. Hm... Chili's not sittin right... Be right back, guys... Gotta use the shitter...

Some Indefinable Time in the Future

What light through yonder window breaks? Oh, but the sun makes my eyes and head ache! Lo! But it seems I didn't quite make it to the toilet and have lain untended in a puddle of my own puke! Is it still Sunday afternoon, or Monday morning? Or Shakespearean England?

Tommy? Terry? Ah, dammit, assholes just left me here!

Better clean this up...

SatireShort StoryMicrofictionHumor
4

About the Creator

C. Rommial Butler

C. Rommial Butler is a writer, musician and philosopher from Indianapolis, IN. His works can be found online through multiple streaming services and booksellers.

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

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Comments (4)

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  • Dharrsheena Raja Segarran8 months ago

    Hahahahahahahahaha this was hilarious! Shakespearean England! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Loved your word and story!

  • Jay Kantor8 months ago

    Sup CR ~ I'm 'Contact' High ~ 'j'

  • Mother Combs8 months ago

    Great word, Charles

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