Meditation

Bella sat cross legged on her bed and smoothed out the velvety purple blanket before laying down the slips of paper one by one. They were her puzzle pieces; questions, worries, and some things she loved that just didn't seem to fit. She knew each one held so much value. They were jewels covered in mud; some wholly so and others just a bit. But each one held a piece of her. Put together they were her life, and, her life, she knew, was also another puzzle piece fitting together with all other lives to make the whole.

She paused to consider the first one. Scribbled in pencil in her rusty cursive it said Friendship with the Ex. She sighed deeply. 'Why do I still feel so pulled towards someone who is so polar opposite from me?' Then she held the slip of paper lightly in both hands. She closed her eyes and raising her hands offered up this relationship to the universe and into its loving embrace.

Softly she breathed out the prayer, "You sent him to me at exactly the right time for the exactly the right reason and with the greatest intentions for him to help me on my path. I know this is true even though it feels false. I know there is a work being done for him and for me that will bring both of us exactly where we need to go. My mind doesn't understand the 'why's' and 'how's' but my spirit trust in love and knows you know the way. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"

Then she opened her eyes and smiled. Placing the paper back on the bed she released the question of what to do with Mark. 'For now, that's enough.', she thought. 'For now, that's all I need to do.'

Next she picked up the slip that read 'Home???'. A shaky sigh escaped her lips, 'Where is home exactly?' and this thought caused tears to spring to her eyes. 'My family adores me and I adore them but home cannot be scattered into more than one place, can it?' Guilt joined confusion as she wondered if this is what her children felt a decade ago when they were told home was now with mom or with dad; whichever one they happened to find themselves with. Oh that's definitely not the way it was put to them but surely it must have been so confusing and so disorienting.

'That's how I feel; so disoriented.' Bella's phone lit up with a random notification and she saw the time. 3:33 pm. Long ago she had studied angel numbers and now they were constant reminders keeping her looking in and up instead of down and out. 3's mean God and the ascended ones are with you, leading the way and giving you more than enough strength and direction to keep you moving towards your highest purpose.

Now the tears poured down her cheeks as the message rang loud and clear throughout her entire being. 'Home is not a place, dear one. Love is home and home is wherever you find love and find the strength to give love; even if it's the last few drops you have left, poured out in surrender, knowing that love spent ALWAYS MULTIPLIES.'

Love Spent Always Multiplies! This is where she stopped her releasing of questions for today. So many were the pieces of her life and so great was the love that made space for them all. God was holding her in this moment and God would never let her go. She was safe. She was loved.

Closing her eyes and following her breath she rested in grace for the rest of her daily meditation.