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Me and the Misses

For the ''They Shouldn't Have Come Here'' Challenge

By Kendall Defoe Published 2 years ago • Updated 6 months ago • 3 min read
Me and the Misses
Photo by Randy Yip on Unsplash

You don’t judge us and we won’t judge you, son. You are just passing through and probably want to know more about this place… As I said, my wife and I have lived here all our lives and this place has its ways that some folks might find downright strange and weird, but…we ain’t changing for anyone.

How’s the lemonade? Yeah, my wife makes the best in the entire county. And that is a very strange thing about all of this: as soon as those trees are ready, we are ready. It does not really make any sense at all, but the harvest begins from right now, not in the fall. You can see the orchards and the vineyards on your way here and even feel that change in the air… Well, maybe all you can do, stranger, is smell it. You would have to be living here for a while to really feel it and think that, yes, this is the right time.

And this is how we met. As soon as the land gets ready with all those treasures, we enjoy ourselves. You noticed that we don’t have no main road running through this place. This is one of those “blink-and-you-miss-it” places you sometimes here about in this country of ours. Plenty of space for it and I don’t point fingers at people who want to stay away from the modern world.

We don’t want anything to do with it.

And what is wrong with what we do?

For just one day out of a very long year, we enjoy ourselves. And biology ain’t going to give you a break just because you have a ring on your finger. If any Misses wants to go off into the woods with another fella and their Misters wants to head off with a lady who’s willing, why should anyone give a hoot about what they do? We ain’t hurting no one, and I don’t feel like the world is going to care at all when we are all living six feet under.

That’s why you are a bit of a problem for us, son.

It is sad, really. You seem like a nice young feller. Probably’d be perfect for the life we lead here. But you really picked the wrong day to show up here and see everything you saw. Not that we are shy about what we do, but we can’t have the likes of you coming down here with your nice bike and that camera you said you never used (glad it wasn’t a phone). It would probably attract the wrong type of attention and we don’t need any of that…

Yeah, the lemonade. My wife is always making the best of its kind; so good, no one notices it when there’s something a little funny about the taste. In this heat, people just knock it back and feel grateful to get anything cool in them.

Yeah, you’re feeling it now.

Don’t worry about your things, feller. No one is going to raise a peep about you, and your stuff will be put to good use. And I know that this seems really unfair, but you have to understand that we have a tradition we want to keep to ourselves.

Me and the Misses thank you for understanding...son.

Anything can happen in the dark...

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Kendall Defoe

Teacher, reader, writer, dreamer... I am a college instructor who cannot stop letting his thoughts end up on the page. No AI. No Fake Work. It's all me...

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    Written by Kendall Defoe