How 'The Bull' turned to Blu

Color was everywhere except in his eyes and I’m sure if he could speak he would say the same of Maddy’s. A thousand Arabian suns could have risen as they stood upon the carpet of marigolds garnishing Kentucky bluegrass but none could have broke their sight. He was a beast, standing at roughly six feet and weighing maybe twenty-five hundred pounds of sheer muscle; donning distinctive white and gray horns each spanning a foot in length, gracefully curved with needle point black tips and a tendency to flaunt them by ramming them into the already worn fence that enclosed the pen.

Maddy never expected to find her spirit in another much less a bull, but in gazing at him for as long as she did, watching him unfold the fabrics of his spirit it was clear, they were the same. Day in and day out, alone he stood in this pen yet afraid he was not; just cloaked with a pungent sadness and armed with a distinct anger.

Without but a moment’s notice his disposition changed towards the unassuming young man with a ragged appearance, and an almost invisible set of manners that was now approaching. His eyes pinned and pupils dilated, nostrils flaring, a gush of saliva dripping down the corners of his mouth, all while stomping and dragging his feet made him a fully weaponized vessel. Which within a mere blink of an eye had managed to sprint half-way across the pen, with horns saluting the sky headed for the steel gate; leaving only chunks of grass flying in the air and a cloud of dirt behind him and with every step Maddy’s heart galloped along and she was overwhelmed by the feeling of adrenaline coursing through her veins. Now only a few feet away, she gasped because she was sure the steel gate would have been tinfoil this time and it almost was. Clank! The impact left visible dents and a distinct echo that rattled her nerves. Something that many have and would find entertaining, especially if coming from city nooks but not her. She had no interest in witnessing a tragedy. Outside of that she enjoyed the liberty that isolation and space afforded her, here in the countryside because without it the family reunion would have been unbearable.

After five minutes or so of the bull running his horn along the gate, whilst snorting and grunting, he returned; breathless and weak, barely in stride, poisoned by his failure to get to the man who was now in the ramshackle red barn. After scuttling about for a minute, he settled underneath two hackberry trees and folded his legs beneath him; her equivalent was locking herself away with tears streaming down her face; while her blood boiled. Angry at the people who’s bladed words and actions lacerated her and left wounds so deep, she questioned if she deserved to be loved; but most of all with herself, for allowing them to do so.

Day after day, she woke up in a loop of being triggered and trying to heal from yesterday’s failures at self-love and thereby a continuous reminder that she was merely an empty clam that once contained a mesmerizingly lustrous pearl according to those who knew her before; visible in pictures but to herself only photoshop’s latest success. So in her mind she began the hunt; even sitting there as VHS tapes were ripped from their decrepit jackets and past reunions replay as the room erupts with laughter and she hears “Maddy you were so cute, always full of fun and laughter” and for a second she’s happy seeing those images but then it sets in, that the sparkle in her eyes and the majestic soul that danced in glittered flame was now absent and if anyone took the time to look they’d see it too.

Returning to the present moment, Maddy saw that the beautiful bull was still intensely watching her so she stayed there at the edge of sorrow’s dark figure, watching the crash of the sun behind the unobscured mountain afar and the edges of the moon blossoming into its full opal figure and the stars playing in the night sky. Steady listening to the night’s ribbits and chirps accompanied by the soft whisper of the wind that tickled her neck. Still, she remained and so did he.

Next came the early rise of the morning, announced by invisible farm cocks. Maddy’s eyes still tightly pursed but catching the peak of green light settling between her lashes. Her mind awoke by the thought of the fact she had slept on earth’s virgin cookie dust which at this time was more comfortable than her own bed but it was the invasive buzzzzz of the bees why she sat up. After which she was surprisingly greeted by the bull that was trying to wrap his sprightly pink tongue around the wings of a glistening blue butterfly which she found rather amusing and at that very moment Maddy decided that he was no longer ‘the bull’ he was Blu.

The thought of leaving the countryside in two days was unpleasant enough but Maddy missing out on knowing if he would be okay made it intolerable for her. She tried quieting her mind by doing as much as she could such as spending more time with him, eating the apples that courted the earth and inhaling the crisp air that made her feel the fullness of her youth. However, those plans would be delayed because she required visiting the cottage, stifling her hunger and renewing her humanity with a decent bath.

Upon entering, there was an overwhelming silence that deafened the boisterous laughter that had been just a few seconds prior. Not to mention the ghastly sight of everyone’s eyes locked on to her tall and slender figure as they sat at the mahogany table eating a Christmas breakfast in July; her younger cousins sniggering under their breath. She said “Good morning.” to which some did not reply and unfazed- journeyed to the bathroom. Where she drowned half her body into the white ceramic old fashioned bathtub and contemplated yesterday. Then emerged, fumbled into some totally insensible fresh clothes and made her way to the brightly-lit kitchen.

Where she glanced outside the old window and saw Blu peacefully grazing with the sun glistening on his back, the pleasantly lush pasture glowing beneath his feet, the birds perched in the nearby laden apple tree shading the dirt patch which the miserly farm dog peacefully slept; all the while a bell ringing in the distance.

Startled by the unexpected presence of the man, Maddy dropped the plate she was holding and into a million pieces it flew and with haste he assisted her in cleaning up, which she greatly welcomed. Unexpectedly, in a raspy southern voice he uttered “I’m sorry I frightened you.” Maddy remained mute but attentive. “My name’s Jimmy by the way. I’ve been meaning to say hello but I’m not very good at talking to people.”-a handshake ensued but an awkward silence continued. “Well I better get going.” and he began his exit through the flimsy screen door but not before Maddy noticed his t-shirt that said Cattle Farm Meats and it clicked to her, that was the fuel behind Blu’s rage. In an attempt to get more answers she dashed into the dining room, plunged her hand into the weathered bread basket, grabbed a croissant and bolted. Leaving everyone slightly irritated.

Stumbling once or twice it wasn’t as graceful a pursuit as Maddy nor anyone else would have hoped, but none the less she persisted and while dong so teared into her croissant that smelt divine and was so moist it disintegrated at the touch of her tongue and the purse of her lips.

“Wait!” She exclaimed as she trailed behind, his brisk stride finally in pause. Now standing beside him she said “You do know why he hates you.”

Shamefully with his head bowed and his eyes peaking through his wavy chestnut hair Jimmy said “Yes. I was responsible for picking up the cows and calves and bringing them to slaughter but I’m trying to make up for it.”

“Make up for it? What do you intend to do? Revive the butchered?”- Maddy hastily asked.

To which Jimmy responded, “No but I realized that I couldn’t work for Cattle West anymore because their cries kept me up at night and it wasn’t until I started buying them from the elderly owner and fixing up my family’s land a few acres from here that I found some peace.”

“So you’ve got a sanctuary?”

“Yes, and he’d be there now, reunited with most of his family, if I could gain his trust and lead him there.”

A million things sprinted through Maddy’s mind, the main being that she expected nothing more than arrogance from Jimmy but instead received humility, and his efforts at redemption. Impulsively and quite foolishly she said “I’ll help you.” To which he responded with a charming asymmetrical smile and blushing red cheeks that highlighted his freckles and then brought Maddy to this gigantic cherry tree that sat atop a small hill that offered the best view of the dreamy pastel sky which was utterly breathtaking. It was there they shared their stories, planned and ate the sweetest lip-staining cherries ever known to man.

Come nightfall they separated and in came the morning when Maddy ate everything in sight and packed over a dozen red apples in her camo patterned backpack in case things went well and Blu and herself got hungry. Afterwards, she made her way over to him; the entire time her heart tap-dancing. As discussed with Jimmy, perfect timing and patience was essential, so she waited and hours became idle benchmarks but finally as she gazed at the sky while resting against the swollen trunk of the pear tree; a white-pearl butterfly fluttered about and that was her sign.

With Maddy’s heart pounding the walls of her chest she made her way to Blu and through the gate. Their eyes aligned as honeycombs and with the gentle breeze now settling her nerves she approached him and surprisingly Blu stepped back and after several attempts at waltzing they were side by side. Blu’s eyes wary of her intentions and in an effort to comfort him Maddy slowly placed her hand on Blu’s jaw and stroked his fluffy mane and his head melted within her hand. When he was completely relaxed she tiptoed and gently placed the loose rope around his neck and walked towards the gate.

Passing that, they moved foot to hoof for what seemed like days, but Maddy kept her mind focused on witnessing him reunite with the family Blu thought he’d lost forever and that was enough for a tear to tumble down her cheek and as she caught this moment of herself mirrored in his eye she saw a person with a sparkle taking form. A sparkle that grew once she and Blu both saw the pasture that laid ahead and the excitement fluidly evident by the many wild brushstrokes Blu’s tail made across Maddy’s back. Once off the dirt path and Jimmy close by but far from view, Maddy freed him from the rope and walked him into the pasture and somehow Blu knew this was his forever home. Right then she expected him to run under the stunning pink and white magnolia tree canopies and over to his family but he did something first. Blu looked at her with water logged eyes, uttered a soft moo and nestled his head in her palm one final time.

Maddy recognized while standing there looking at Blu, his family, Jimmy and herself that their lives were painted with watercolors all along, for had they not experienced anguish, they couldn’t have appreciated joy; and had they not experienced rage they couldn’t have known the value of a blue butterfly.