Hell on Wheels

I was riding my flame decorated motorcycle on a dark road on a dark night to a dark place. It had a trailer hitch on it, so I hooked up a large trailer to my cycle because I was about to bring in a large haul. I got a tip about a large criminal convention put together by a huge criminal organization called Basura Del Infierno, or Garbage From Hell. All the worst criminals were going to be there, and so was I.

They correctly named themselves. They were in fact garbage, and I was the janitor. My job was to take out the trash. I was a licensed bounty hunter, and they were wanted dead or alive. I didn’t care if I had to burn the place to the ground with them all tied up inside, I was going to get my bounty. And I had the longest day of the year, the solstice, to complete my mission.

I had my 12 gauge strapped to my back, a 38 Smith & Wesson in one sock, a throwing knife in the other, a Glock in my gun holster, a flamethrower hooked to my belt and an Uzi strapped to my chest. That was in addition to the weapons I was hiding in my utility belt. I had about a dozen throwing stars hidden throughout my jacket and was also carrying a sword. My motorcycle was also equipped with several weapons like heat seeking missiles and bunker busters, and I was ready to take on the mob.

I arrived at their criminal complex and poured kerosine infused gasoline around the building and lit the place ablaze. I ran to the front door and as they came out shooting, I pointed my flamethrower and fired, burning some of them and scaring others who ran away. I didn’t want their ugly mugs to be unrecognizable so I could get my reward when I dragged their corpses down to the station, so when the shooting had ceased I found a hose and put out the flames.

More bad guys came running out of the building and I turned the flamethrower back on. When that ran out of fuel I quickly grabbed and threw my ninja stars.

Then I whipped out my automatic and started sporadically shooting, taking out a few more bad guys. Then I threw a grenade from my utility belt. The grenade blew off some bad guys limbs when it exploded.

“You’ll never bring me in alive, bounty hunter,” someone yelled.

“Fine with me,” I said and shot him right between the eyes with my Glock as he trained his gun on me.

I used all the weapons I had with me then went back on my motorcycle. I fired the heat seeking missiles, then the bunker busters. They should all be dead and ready to be hauled off in my trailer.

I went inside the building to check, and it seemed like they were all dead.

One guy got the drop on me and held a knife to my throat.

“You shouldn’t have come here, law man,” he growled.

“And why not?” I asked, flipped around and karate chopped the knife out of his hand then grabbed it to use myself.

“Please, sir, I don’t want to go to jail,” the man said in a tiny voice.

“You should have thought of that before you became a criminal and joined this convention,” I said. Then I flipped kicked his face and he passed out. I cuffed him and dragged him to the storage trailer for identification.

I looked through my wanted posters and he was a low value target, only five grand.

I dragged the rest of them back to the trailer and my highest value criminal was worth over one hundred grand in reward money. This was my lucky day.

I drove the corpses and my one living guest to the police station and dropped them off. They wrote me a check, I made my deposit at the bank, and I drove off into the night looking for my next bounty.