Having to let go..

Defined by the wonderful Goggle, collateral damage is defined, and I quote "injury inflicted on something other than intended target."

This is Ashley's story, that I am telling..

When this kind of chaos is intended, pre-meditated as well as organized. For the sole purpose to disrupt another's real life, their reality, for no real reason, but to cause Ashley to focus on the wrong things, the ones who targeted Ashley, and ruined not only her life, but anyone she knew and was close with, as well as attacked them with the, not only once drug that only 1 or 2% of people can recover from. Someone in Ashley's past, actually told Ashley that was the plan. He doesn't go through with anything, the one who told her this in 2014, she didn't think he was serious, until the one person in this whole wide world right now who could and she knows would erase he evil that has been done to her for 6 years, at least life declined as well as our communication, the one who told me, sent someone to his life to keep him away from Ashley, and while in the midst of it, he forgot that he is who she needs most of all. After all this whole non existent person, who has been ruining lives, but finally gave Ashely ammo to ruin his, for real reasons, don't worry it comes later. Even if he tries, she said I could, you can't do what he has done for years, and get away with it. This person who told her, that he was just going to get them, (anyone he wanted out of her live), addicted to meth, she didn't believe he had that much control and he doesn't, but that drug does, and it doesn't help when the people someone is around will poison them, with just an unnoticeable crystal, and when one is clean, that is all it takes is for those receptors to be woke, and the rest is out everyone's hands, until the one lost wants help. That is when she lost the true loves of her life. She has yet to reunite with any of them, and she hopes it's not a loss cause, because when she reached for help, it didn't go unnoticed. Yes, the one who told her this is probably a lifer and no matter how much she loved his friendship, when that dirty drug is included, Ashley watched the man that both her and her son adore, become someone she wanted nothing to do with, and to this day still doesn't'. She thought he was exclusive, only to find out, it doesn't matter who is next to him, as long as someone is, he is the one who never made it out of, "not only once."

In Ashley's observations when someone is at war with themselves, and someone like Ashley happens to be the collateral damage, it can be so life alternating, but then continues to be a pattern in her life for years, now, a malicious, all for financial and they hope freedoms gain. Just as the truth was coming around to her in a place she once felt safe, she got abruptly discarded since whoever was about to be exposed, wasn't ready, when the truth is, if she didn't create them, then her father did, and they were both betrayed, to this day, and if he didn't, then they are straight fucked and have been trespassing in Ashley's once REAL safe place this whole time. Trying to drive her crazy, like they are around her right now, summer 2020 unfolded, and they are all still very neglectful and greedy. Their idea was, waste more time, then block anyone who will expose them and with the time wasted, I am sure someone wants Ashley's friends death, justice for it, and it isn't Ashley, because that is chaos, without the right people, and it wont bring her back, but it could save many other lives.

As they continue to blocked her from any other real person, she has decided, no more excuses, who can fix what he broke, knows exactly where Ashley is, and if they truly cared, would be by her side right now, and never would of exposed her to that other thing was. They wanted to destroy it to the point of no return, like they have before, they took Ashley's best friend, who Ashley found out for sure, she was connected to the movement in Ashley's life. Just like a song says, these murders will never have to face a judge, or will they?

Why are they trying to use Ashley's grief from losing everyone she connected with, and turn it into anger, all for what? Too bring down the only person that has been keeping her mind afloat, and she doesn't even know who it is, all she knows is she vibes with them, she connects with them and she thought they were like minded. However, leaving Ashley hopeless, and helpless on purpose, for this long, sadly like minded is far from it, she is beginning to wonder if she even had a true connection with these 2 people, before the hoe invasion, which lead to a ton of trauma for Ashley, trauma that only someone who would want her dead were do to her.

Knowing her, but portraying strangers, they slipped up when they delivered Ashley the wrong mail, more than once, and face the facts, if anyone around Ashley right now was a stranger, they wouldn't even think to leave this mail, and Ashley truly is one of the dopest souls, that if they were strangers, like last time, they would be kicking it with her, not doing everything they can to kick her down and rub in her face that they have been cashing her allowance checks for who knows how long. What should of been a form of love, has just people around her that think they know her, rubbing in her face, that they are, have been and successfully have been taking Ashley's money that was left to her, by more than one person, to boost her and keep her afloat, until her house came to her. After all the loses she has been forced to take, never by choice honestly, Ashley is going to claim that house with pride, and make it her own, where no body she doesn't approve of can come and disrupt her peace. Like they have been since they followed her to her father in 2014.

After all, it is all a lie that Ashley is living, produced by the people she is currently around. Little do they know that it is now law around Ashley that she is never to think about the stagnant situations created by these outsiders, that she can't change. Sadly where she is that is all she thinks about, and god knows it has been way to long since she has laughed or had joy in her life.

Knowing deep down the truth, these lie enablers, boundary crosser's as well as thief's are that out of their minds to target Ashley. The one producing the chaos and memories, Ashley actually found out that there is a literal restraining order against every single person in this house as well to who ever has access to this house. Since it is no one that serves the purpose they are suppose to. Ashley being comfortable, is one of the many laws that no one around here want to believe, and she hasn't felt as uncomfortable as she does, in awhile, if ever.

As they hurt her daily, trying to use the 5 stages of grief to their advantage like they did in 2016, what they don't know is that Ashely already went through anger, denial, bargaining, while these fakes were no where in sight. She is now in the last stages of grief, her never ending depression worsens and acceptance has begun. While the ones I was discarded to be around. Have only tried to trigger her back to stage one. Something that anyone who has been through grief knows, its is an evolution, and can't go back, the only way it will, will be through self destruction, Ashley's way, only, and yes Ashley has other ways than boring ass drugs to self destruct. This anger these "strangers" is something Ashley has left behind and worked through already, and since they don't get the hyped up Ashley anymore, they killed her, so they can only blame themselves, They have made her life so passionless, that there is nothing to fight for, like whoever is desperate enough to lose everything they have earned, can have Ashley's current life, it's nothing to live for and safety is out the window. Therefore, this version is all the person who wants it. This isn't her life anymore, unlike many of Ashley's harasser, Ashley's brain changed when she became a parent, sadly these girls, did not, and it shows.

Since the masked cowards appeared, dressed up like a circus who seems stupid, and will soon realize what they are staying for, will no longer be embraceable to them. Can't dip everywhere anyways, greedy is what they all are, while they single hand watch the person they are stealing from struggle in every way, when she does reach out to the only person she can, she gets on the line with a female that doesn't want to see Ashley, scared pf her, but isn't scared when stealing Ashley;s everything, behind a mask. since she is has enjoyed Ashley's reality to long as well as her perks, that's over.

She is so delusional that, in the institution, she was right, if seeing Ashley happy means a thief who doesn't live by any moral code goes to jail, then it is just one less in the person on person thief world, that is what she stated she wanted, so careful what you wish for. The things they do are behind a mask and subliminal, they aren't fooling anyone, not to mention Ashley is too depressed, as she slowly accepts loss. Trying to heal the part of herself that has go into self destruction mode, someone in the house she lives in is always trying to put Ashley into self destruction mode.

After dividing her from anyone in her life that meets her standards of people to be around, is when they wait, lie to the other parties, then strike, like a god damn enemy, when it's all in their heads. Ashley has a way to deal with their madness, and it is simply not engaging in it. This has shown the narcissists are exposed for who they are. Also once they are certain that there is no going back, they discard Ashley again, knowing that is also against the law in the world they have forced her and themselves into. Just like neglecting her from connections and anyone with a brain, or anyone that is a permanent fixture in her life, and starving her of basic needs, and wants. Ashley can't even remember the last time she wanted something, instead of needing it.

Ashley came to find out, 6 years later, that a crew member that was trusted, betrayed the whole movement and tried to kill Ashley and to this day is trying to kill Ashley, trying to drive her mad, in this closet sized room, with no free will. Ashley's parents, unlike the aunt she had to disown, worked their whole life to give Ashley better, but someone has been stealing it instead, leaving her homeless multiple times, even in the winter, while they collected her allowance.

How does she know this to be a fact, well these people who got involved, after already discarding her multiple times, the person that foul play was involved in killing, told her. Surprise, yes the one that actually died, not the one this room renting situation is for, but the one who actually died, told Ashley all about her allowance, before they killed her, probably killing her, since she was about to reveal what would of moved Ashley and her true friends lives forward, and the ones who have mistaken Ashley as a doormat would of been left as specks, 5 years ago, like they should of been. That is when they used her past against her, and killed her. Ashley's friend was also a real woman of service, something the specks didn't know. Now they play as if they are a part of the movement, only when it benefits them, and Ashely is positive that after they get the funds they are fasley using social security numbers to receive, is when they will put chaos into her life some how.

Where is a real service crew member you may be wondering, well sadly Ashley is wondering the same thing, and dividing her from her connection she has had since she was 17 proves that they are up to some scandalous things, and once Ashley makes a move, it won't be able to be undone and the person who used their social to falsely claim Ashley as a depend, but hasn't been dependable since, whole existence will begin to unravel. After all, he is there for the other dependents he has claimed in the past. That is the funny thing about friendship, you never discard your meal ticket, as well as free rent, but never fuck over the person who knows everything. From the height in apt 11 to eye level, Ashley knows everything, and so does someone else, someone who speaks truth to her, the situation last weekend proves it, as well as the lack of being a friend, to the doormat, that is about to expose whoever it is.

Ashley, trying to move on with her life, and leave the non existent person she doesn't even want to be, instead she wants to make the perfect friend out of him, she doesn't want to be him, (even though she is) or take anything he worked for. As she tries to move on from him, she is hit with the truth, that fake persona or herslef, and some may think she is going all 2011 on this fake person, but really she's just trying to move on with her life, and a choice he made has now effected it, if he would ask the man he desperately wishes he could measure up to, the IRS is not the best of the best to be investigated by, but now I am trying to move on, he became undependable, and that social security number used, that has made false claim after false claim for years, he is looking at something that Ashley can't even fathom, since she is not that dumb. She would never use someones credit to get a car, falsely claim them as a dependent and discard them 2 weeks later, after keeping them up against their will for 6 days. In the worst mind frame ever, she kicked her, disguised as a boy. Knowing that they want Ashley to catch anther charge for a fake person, she's going to have to tell the IRS what he/she did, Just so Ashley can move on with her life, what a shame, he of herself didn't show by the time she needed them too, and didn't even send a nail biting representative to do the right thing, their job, the only reason they are allowed in Ashley's life, now whether there is a block or not, she will get on the right server, to become the hurricane he/she thinks she is, now she just has to become the eye herself. Just another example of collateral damage. Ashley truly doesn't care how this will effect their life, since these people have proved to her time and time again, that they don't care about hers, want to take her life even. One for real, and one just her life on the outside of this lie.

Which to Ashley seems real one sided, and not something according to the laws of the Ashley's new world order, is even illegal. Since Ashley isn't even a part of this war someone has within themselves, she is just forced to suffer, after her father and mother worked real hard, building up people to protect her from these exact people. As these people run around as one of the heroes of her life, abusing, using, lying and trying once again to manipulate her as those people, she has decided to let it all go, and see what stays, without a quarter to her name, and around people who made her that way, projecting who they are onto her, because Ashley worked hard also for what she did obtain, until the past hunted her down, all for her allowance, and to keep anyone and everyone who could change Ashley's daily life, away from her. Praying Ashley ends up on the path they stole from her again, and soon, they are all unaware that the undying love she has, will never allow herself to waste another moment on people who can't get out of a life they repeatedly chose.

Sad really, and really shows the person who is at war with themselves character way more than whatever they are and still are doing to Ashley.

The people who targeted her, are and still are will never be effected by it, (so they wish) add in the little remorse and constant abuse to a stranger, Ashley is a stranger to them, and although they may have known her at one point, they truly never did, and unless your in her daily life communicating with her at this moment, they don't know her. They don't know that everything she has experienced and lived through, matches perfectly to who or where she should be, instead of being the back lash of the someones self haterd. have, anyone with a brain and eyes, see what is going on, but why don't they ever say anything, or help her, well that has yet to be discovered. Ashely got robbed of everything and everyone she knew, all for what, small amounts of money. Ashley has healed parts of her, so to Ashley it just feels cruel, hateful and unnecessary. Being trapped in a life that is not hers, for so many years eventually ended up frustrating her, to the point that the ones aiming the negativity at her, she has decided to aim it right back at them, instead of someone they really wish she would. Someone who rejected them, and with low self esteem, apparently handle rejection and their freedom is worth the vengeance they want on the people who have rejected them, and told them never.

Ashley, although a weapon, she is no ones pawn, because they are desperate to poop at a house they don't belong in, and who they aimed this madness at, proves it.

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