Effie & Simon

She's in my bed again. I'm sat here on the sofa. I'll sleep here, once I'm done, and it won't be comfortable, but she's welcome to what little comfort she can take at this point. Bruised again? Maybe. Gaunt, definitely. She's sleeping the restless sleep of the truly exhausted, only to wake up empty.

I oscillate between angry at her, to full of pity, and tonight, the dice landed on the latter.

She has an enormous house, one I could get lost in finding my way to one of the many spare bedrooms. So maybe, by rights, it ought to be the other way round, and I should be staying at hers. I can't though. Not since the restraining order. That house is technically Lonnie's.

Mad, isn't it? A restraining order! Against me! He's twice my size, and I've never so much as laid a finger on him. It's not me hurting his sister.

I don't mind. I don't begrudge her. Not after what she's been through. I'm her brother, after all. We've had our differences. She's infuriated me at times. But I have to look out for her.

Even though it's her fault.

All her fault.

+

I hated Lonnie from the off, no two ways about it. Here, I can admit I disliked most of the men she was interested in. Was it jealousy? Maybe. She was drawn to men who were tall and classically handsome, with resources granted to them by luck of birth that I could never hope to attain in a lifetime.

But Lonnie was different. I can't quite put my finger on why. He's not good-looking, not so much as the other men she's dated. But what he lacks in looks he makes up for in charisma, and many times over in wealth.

He was born with a platinum spoon up his bottom, and if he'd never lifted a finger to work all his life, he'd still be fat and happy off Daddy's money. While he's never worked in the traditional sense, he's invested plenty of that cash, here and there. Many projects failed, but several enjoyed enough success that he's now obscenely rich in his own right.

He dazzled Effie, not just with expensive gifts and grand gestures (which she might have seen through a mile off) but also with flashes of insight about her. His efforts could, at times, be strikingly thoughtful, and require more from him than merely throwing money around.

Love-bombing, I think they call it. Oh, he made her feel so special. It worked, too. She fell hard and hopelessly head-over-heels in love with that slimeball. Nothing I said made a blind bit of difference. That did little to endear him to me, either. Effie had always listened to me before. Nothing ever dimmed her smile when she spoke to me, her little-big-brother. But now, if I said one word against Lonnie, her expression grew distant and her voice went cold.

+

I'm ashamed to say it. The day she came to me with the news she was pregnant (before she even told him), I urged her to "get rid of it".

I bore that little passenger no ill-will. Crazy to say, maybe, when I'd advocated for its demise. I just couldn't bear the thought of Effie being fastened to him so permanently, so inescapably. Nor the idea of some poor kid being saddled with that for a father.

"You can do better," I told her, earnestly. "And if this is the man you want a family with, Effie, don't you think you should have assurances from him first?" I was sure, if he'd proposed, we'd all know about it, not least because her hand would be weighed down with an diamond of frankly ridiculous proportions. It simply wasn't Lonnie's style to discuss such a thing, not when it presented an opportunity for one of his grand gestures.

Effie looked stunned. Foolishly, perhaps, I plowed on. "Do you have a girlfriend who can come with you? You shouldn't be alone. I'll come, if there's no one else."

She stilled and pulled away at the same time. I saw it, felt it, but there was nothing I could do to mend the hole I'd just torn in our relationship.

"Lonnie will be thrilled," she said in an icy tone. "He was told he couldn't have children. That's why we weren't... Never mind. It doesn't matter. I'd better go."

"Effie, please! Wait! Listen!"

She whirled to face me, and her eyes flashed. I couldn't tell if it was anger, or unshed tears.

"No, Simon, you listen! You always say you support me, but you despise every man I ever date. Don't you want me to be happy? Don't I deserve that? Well, you can just keep your nose out from now on, alright? I don't care what you think anymore. Just keep your spiteful thoughts to yourself. Lonnie is different. I love him, and if you actually care, you'll respect that."

She stalked away.

+

Pregnancies can be fragile. So I told myself. There was still hope she could escape this. To my dismay, unlike my mother with me, Effie was the picture of health. I heard this from our parents, because Effie avoided me completely.

I thought, our parents being so traditional, they'd share my view. As ever, Effie could do no wrong in their eyes. They allowed their excitement at becoming grandparents to overshadow everything else.

+

I've never been so disappointed to be proved right, but the cracks in her relationship with Lonnie started to show over the following months. Growing in tandem, it seemed, with the neat little bump.

I thought there was no way I could repair things with my sister, but circumstances forced our hands.

Her daughter arrived early, on Christmas Eve. Things with Lonnie were, in Effie's words, "rocky", so she couldn't go there. Nor did she want to spend Christmas in the hospital, with limp bits of tinsel and a sad looking tree.

My parents were only too happy for her to come home for the season. Perpetually single, I always went home for Christmas, so of course I was there, too. I braced myself for the awkwardness.

It might have been on the first full day of her stay, or the second or the third. I walked in when Effie was feeding Loreli. Flustered, I almost backed out again.

"Simon, wait. Please."

Father had made himself scarce for the same reason, I imagine, and Mother had scurried off to fetch a glass of water and another cushion.

"Would you hold her for me? Just for a moment?"

Stiff and awkward, but trying to show willing, I took the bundle from her.

"Mind her head," Effie said.

I barely heard. In the gentle manouvering to get the baby settled safely in the crook of my arm, I happened to look down. In that moment I saw the most perfect creature that ever existed. The warmth of her melted something in me, that heavy milky smell had me in its soft grip. One tiny hand flailed out of the blankets. It curled readily around my finger, and my heart. I doubt I could be more infatuated with a daughter of my own.

+++

Part One:

Part Two:

Thank you for reading!