Darkness

The silence was deafening. I couldn’t remember the last time I had heard another human voice. I watched the crackling fire before me. It moved in a repetitive fashion and seemed always as bored as I felt. I threw on a few more logs to keep the fire raging but it still seemed dwarfed in the surrounding darkness.

I had long since ran out of ideas or things to keep me moving. My mind felt dull and I knew I had already thought all things worth thinking. I was certain they had long since forgotten about me. I was certain that several generations and lifetimes had passed but I stayed. I waited, fearing what might happen if I failed in my task.

I stared at the fire with resentment. It seemed like an ordinary fire, a plain burning with nothing spectacular about it. When I started, I could see the magic and powers it possessed. I understood its holy purpose. I guarded it with vigor. I prepared myself for all types of enemies that might come and steal its power but no one ever came. Nothing ever stalked or haunted me for the fire except the darkness. The eternal darkness, surrounding me and swallowing me whole.

Smoke started to blow in the wind, causing me to choke momentarily. I grunted and moved my chair to a new position. I narrowed my eyes at the fire as if it could feel or care about my anger. The fire continued to dance around, unphased by my emotions. It only made me more bitter and frustrated. It blazed on and burned, bringing out more magic and life to the surrounding worlds and felt nothing, needed nothing. Meanwhile, I sat here frozen in time, unable to live any other existence or escape the darkness. I wrapped my jacket tighter around me trying to cut off the darkness’s access.

The fire looked happy, almost cheerful with this movement. I gathered a few more logs and threw them on the fire. The piles that once seemed infinite had started to dwindle down but never seemed to run out. It was as if someone came and replaced them while I slept, of course, I knew that was impossible. There was no life in this abandoned province. No one but me and the everlasting fire I was ordered to protect from nonexistent threats.

I started to close my eyes and tried to hear some sound beyond the simple sounds of the flames growing, but the world was silent. I succumbed to the darkness and tried to summon sleep. As I drifted off, I thought I heard a faint noise far in the distance. My eyes shot open. I looked around but nothing had changed. I was still completely surrounded by darkness. I kept my eyes open but slumped back into my chair. As I moved to close them again I heard another sound - almost like a laugh. It was still far away but closer than before. I stood up abruptly.

I took a larger stick nearby and put it to the flame before holding it out to see further into the darkness.

“Show yourself,” I demanded to the abyss. Silence. I moved a bit closer, away from the fire and the laughter came again, nearer this time. “Who are you?” I inched back towards the fire. Without taking my eyes off the darkness I picked up another log and threw it on the fire.

It had been over 3000 years but finally someone had come.

The laughter seemed all around me now, echoing off the hollow darkness.

“Yes, grow the fire, little one,” the voice called. I couldn’t pinpoint where it was coming from. I foolishly moved around in circles looking for something - anything in the blackness.

“Who are you?” I demanded again. “I must warn you, the gods have given me great powers to protect the flame. You will not succeed in putting it out.”

I was only answered by boisterous laughter. It grew almost as if its source was growing larger in the dark. I continue to move around, keeping my eye on every direction.

“I have no desire to put it out, little one,” the voice replied. “I come to steal it and replenish my own power.”

Fear crept up inside of me. I had trained for years before being assigned but it was so long ago I could hardly remember. I had sat still like a molding statue for centuries waiting for this moment but now that it had come I felt woefully unprepared. I did my best to hide the fear from my expression but the continued laughter suggested my efforts were in vain.

“Come out then, show yourself and take it from me.”

“There’s no need for all of that. I feel reasonably certain that you’ll give it to me,” the voice replied. I kept circling, looking for flashes of anything but whatever it was blended in too well with the void. I scoffed out a nervous laugh.

“I’ve been assigned to guard this flame as my high destiny for all of time. I’ve been here for thousands of years fulfilling my purpose. Now that I have a challenge you have the audacity to suggest I would lie down and give it to you?”

More laughter. My annoyance and frustration was starting to over power my fear. I waved the fire around tirelessly, still aiming to try to see something. Nothing appeared.

“Because I know the truth. I know why you’re here and I know that your many, many lifetimes have been a waste.”

My throat went dry and my knees started to shake.

“What?” I couldn’t hide the tremors in my tone. More arrogant laughing.

“Did you think you were special? A magic man chosen by the gods for the task of guarding all magic and life? Protect the eternal flame and be the ultimate hero?”

I stayed silent. I had thought all of those things but now this faceless voice was giving me cause for doubt. Was there another reason? Had my purpose been worthless? What was he talking about?

“Tell me the truth then. Convince me to give you the flame.”

The voice made a smug noise.

“This world is a tortured place to be. How could you have withstood it for so long? You never wondered why they’d put the flame here? You never wondered why they’d leave you alone in the darkness for so long?”

“Tell me or prepare to fight me.”

The voice laughed around me again.

“Such frustration and built up rage, little one. I can see your doubt, you see the truth in my statements.”

I remained quiet and waited. Whatever this being was, it clearly enjoyed toying with me and I no longer wanted to give it the satisfaction.

“You don’t remember who you are, little one. They took that from you and stripped you of your powers before banishing you here. But I remember. You aren’t a mere mortal man granted eternal life and blessed with god powers. You were the ultimate god - the one who towered over the rest, the one who ruled and withheld the flame within you. You let it out in strikes of lightning, empowering or destroying at will. The others, they turned against you. Your fall is still the greatest tragedy in history.”

As he spoke strange flashes started to burn across my mind. Images, memories that made no sense but planted more doubt.

“Lies,” I mumbled out, but I wasn’t so sure. Arrogant chuckles filled the empty space.

“I have no reason to lie to you,” the voice answered.

“If that’s true, what’s stopping me from consuming the flame again and taking my powerful place again? Why would you tell me it was mine if you wanted it for yourself?” I demanded. The voice did not answer. For a moment the space was filled with the same deafening silence and I feared that it had left.

“Go ahead, try to consume the flame. Do you even know how?”

I turned back and stared at the flame. It looked the same - happy as ever - just burning and dancing, crackling through the blackness. I tried to connect with it. I tried to remember my past, a life when I was a god with the power of the flame inside of me. Nothing came to my mind. No memory or feeling of the life the voice described.

“I’m sure I can figure it out,” I answered, adversely. Now the voice laughed wildly and loudly again. If there had been other life on this deserted plane, he would have woken them all up.

“If you give it to me, I can help you get out of here and help you get revenge on those who put you here.” There was something in the voice that gave me pause and sent a shiver down my spine. The idea of leaving this place, however, was too tempting.

“I’m not sure I can trust you,” I answered. I felt foolish stating it out loud but I couldn’t help but let my mind race about the possible negative outcomes of trusting an unknown voice. There came a loud guttural noise that filled the space.

“What are you afraid of? That I won’t keep my word? What are your other options? A few more millennia here?” It was clear that I had upset him. His deep voice growled around me and shook the flame. I threw on a few more logs.

“Can you blame me? If what you say is true then I’ve been betrayed by everyone I thought I knew. I know nothing. I’ve been abandoned here to rot with my power right next to me and I’ve been unable to obtain it. There must have been a reason they sought to tear me down, perhaps this power is too much for one world to handle. Who could say it’d be better in your hands? Perhaps in giving it to you, I doom the world?”

Another deep groan that shook the cold sand beneath me.

“I am the only one who’s come to you in 3000 years! I sought to find you, to free you, to recover your powers into the world to save it. This is my thanks? Perhaps I should take the fire and leave you here to rot,” the voice snarled.

A rush of nauseating panic rushed over me. I couldn’t stand the idea of being stuck here any longer, especially not without at least the flame.

“No, I’m sorry, please don’t abandon me here again. Please free me from this prison.”

“Give me the flame and I shall do so,” the voice answered. I nodded.

“Okay,” I mumbled, stepping aside, “take it.”

“No, the flame is yours - your power - you have to will it to me.”

I swallowed hard. I turned back to the flame and watched it dance. It didn’t seem to register the pending decision or that its fate could change. It seemed content to dance in the dark until the end of time. I, however, was not.

“Okay, I will you to have my power. I offer you the flame. Take it and take me away from this place,” I cried out. The laughter rose again but now it was darker and more malicious. I knew instantly I had made a mistake. The darkness swarmed in and consumed the flame in its entirety. I felt as if the darkness were sucking it directly out of me. I could feel the connection now that I had once had to the flame. Now I was cold and pained. I fell to my knees.

“You lied to me,” I groaned.

“No, I told you I’d free you from this place and so I shall. I just wasn’t specific how. Without the flame, the time you’ve lived will catch up to you. Soon you’ll find peace in the afterlife. I will create a better world with this power, soon they will all understand.”

My body felt small and brittle. My skin was dry and chapped in the emptiness of the wasteland. I could sense the presence was gone now but it didn’t matter. My one challenger in 3000 years and I had failed. I deserved to die alone - wasted into the nothingness of my personal hell.