Commiserations of the Commuter

For context, this was a message sent to me by my partner early in the morning, predominently in jest. I am trying to prove that he can no longer claim to have no talent in writing. Please share your thoughts in the comments.

However y’all day starts good or bad, please take refuge in my downfall.

Headed to the train station to catch a train-which, by the way, is a task I have successfully completed many times now.

Some would say that this is in fact not the first time I have partaken in said cow riding competition. (See ‘rodeo’)

I am alk up the ramp and lock eyes with the employee behind the little cowards reinforced glass window.

An animal, safe, or trapped, either way he sits alone watching the world go by.

He ponders to himself, as always, if I am to be an upstanding citizen whomst taps on, or if I am to ride the train during the free period without following the appropriate protocol like some sort of lawless renegade.

Naturally my conscience takes over. I reach for my pocket and retrieve the rectangle that grants me access.

Success, I sing to myself as my body proceeds to autonomously adjust to the shape of the germ infested gates all while accommodating my large backpack without a second thought.

Denial.

Shock.

Confusion.

My groin is greeted by an immovable green blockade.

A miss-swipe, it can’t be, I was so sure, my tappable technique as tight as ever.

A flaw in the machine, a flaw in society?

I tap again.

I can hear the gates gathered at my gooch giggling gleefully.

A single man flanks me but in the moment it feels as if an amphitheatre has formed just out of my periphery to relish in the tragedy I am unwillingly crafting.

Then it becomes clear.

My fatal flaw.

My erratic error.

My gilded goof.

The work pass, that which has granted me access without hesitation or dismay so many times before, falters.

As do I.

The realisation leads to fumbling of pockets, muttering of excuses, lowering of one’s head.

Shame.

I cannot face the man behind the glass, for while I once used to mock him for his security, it is now I who wishes to be safe behind the impenetrable wall of solitude.

Am I the animal now?