All The Gold In The World

"When you lose a parent, you grieve two deaths. One for the parent. One for a piece of yourself. To disappoint a parent while they live and breathe is an innate human fear."

***

Jude eyed the envelope.

Whatever the outcome, I will not let it bother me. I have enough to worry over.

“I just want to get this over with,” said Jude. He slumped into his chair. “Sorry" he added, "it’s been a long couple of weeks. I’ve lost all my manners." He shook Mark's hand firmly, "It’s good to see you.”

Mark crossed his fingers and lay them on top of the desk. “Before we begin, I should warn you-”

A young woman appeared at the door. Her mischievous smile caught Jude by surprise.

"Warn him about what exactly?" said Kensie.

He let out a grunt, “Typical for you to show up when it counts. Guess you missed your flight to the funeral?”

Her eyes widened, “You're one to talk.” She hesitated, “Need I remind you of your last conversation with our father?”

Jude tensed. “He told you we fought?”

Mark cleared his throat aggravatedly. “He loved you both, more than anything and you loved him. That’s all anyone needs to know.” The lanky man tugged at his tie.

“So, what does it say?” asked Kensie. Mark analyzed the room. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigar.

“How much time do we have?” asked Mark, with a forced laugh.

Kensie shook her head, “None, I’m afraid.” Both of the men groaned.

“I have to get back. How long will this take?” She plopped down with a sigh. Jude suddenly hoped the reading of their father's will would prove too long for her taste.

“What our dad does, he does for a reason," said Jude. "He always has a plan and a lesson to teach if we are smart enough to see it.”

If only I were then. I would have acted differently. I would have shown him how much he meant to me.

When Mark finished, the room went silent enough to hear the pitter-patter of rain on the roof. Even Kensie sat frozen in place.

Mark brushed his pants, "To sum it up there are two ways to receive your inheritance, you can both follow his trail of instructions to a hidden chest, or claim it on your 50th birthday."

Jude laughed hysterically. Kensie would live decades before seeing a penny of their father's. They both would. He felt the pressure release from his chest.

"Quit laughing you sick nincompoop!" yelled Kensie. Both men chuckled. For a moment, tensions melted like butter.

She objected, "I'll just go by myself and find the chest and-"

Mark raised a finger, "No, the only requirement your father made is that you have to go together." Kensie looked ready to implode. "Never."

"Where is the first destination clue?" asked Jude, stroking his chin.

"You can't be serious. If you think I'm following a dimwit like you you're mistaken. I refuse to go." said Kensie.

She crossed her arms. "Are there any legal loopholes?"

Mark puffed his cigar. "None."

Kensie huffed dramatically. Without another word, she retreated towards the lobby.

"At least you don't have to be alone with her," sneered Mark.

"She's my blood which will never change. My father's biggest priority was his family. We've done a fantastic job messing it up. It's about time we tried to fix our mistakes."

He found Kensie already in her car.

"Why don't we go for it? You know you could use that money." He quipped.

She rolled her eyes, "Sixty and I'll do it." He watched as she put the car in park.

"Huh?"

"Whatever we get when we find it, I'm entitled to 60% of it," said Kensie.

"Deal."

If I honor his wishes, it will ease the pain. It would never erase what happened, only make it livable again.

In the envelope were two items. A photograph and a small list of hastily written instructions:

Take kayaks downriver and meet at The Wolf's Den. Further instructions will follow.

Love, Dad.

"Couldn't we drive to The Wolf's Den?" asked Kensie, impatiently shaking her head. He didn't want to admit he'd wondered it too,

"We do this the way he intended, or not at all.", said Jude.

"Why is how we get there so important?" she asked, putting her feet on the dash of the car.

"Because the journey beats the destination, isn't that what he always told us?" He saw a flash of sadness in her eyes, soon replaced with irritation.

***

The river cascaded through masses of rock, it wasn't a beginner's kayaking venture. Jude tried not to worry about what could happen and focused on going the right way. Kensie checked the kayaks' functions.

"We'd better get going before the sun gets too low," said Jude.

He reached for her hand to help her into the kayak. She reluctantly obliged. He took the rear position so he could keep watch.

"Stay close. These waters are dangerous."

Jude watched Kensie match pace with him.

"This brings memories back", she said.

"Remember when I lost you in the woods and Dad freaked out?" asked Jude.

She giggled. "And I hid from you both so you'd get in more trouble."

He relished in his sister's laugh.

"What did Dad tell you about our fight?" asked Jude.

Kensie frowned, "He never spoke of it. I only watched his demeanor change. I've never seen him like that. We had plenty of fights over the years."

"Some fights can end as quickly as they're begun. This was not that kind, I'm afraid."

***

The river tossed them like ragdolls. Their kayak slammed into a boulder causing Kensie to fall in. He used his oar for leverage, but the current pulled her downstream. Her screams rang in his ears as he dove in. The current took hold of their bodies. He caught her lifejacket and yanked them both to the side. They wheezed air into their lungs. Scratches from jagged rocks covered their skin.

"Never speak of this to anyone," huffed Kensie.

"I won't if you won't," said Jude.

Only a sliver of sun was visible. With trembling limbs, they headed up towards the lodges.

"We need to get to Wolf's Den tonight. I will not sleep anywhere else," said Kensie.

"It's five miles off yet! We'll freeze to death before we make it!" said Jude. Kensie marched to the middle of the road. She caused a pick-up to slam on their brakes.

"No. I'd rather walk," said Jude.

"Suit yourself," said Kensie flippantly. She hopped into the passenger seat.

He met her at the window, bewildered. It was her shivering that made him give in. It didn't stop him from eyeing the strange man who picked them up. Kensie elbowed him more than a few times.

The Wolf's Den was a gorgeous cabin of cherry wood, filled with jolly folk from all over the states. Kensie looked around in awe at the taxidermy bear and moose mounted on the walls. She looked innocent without her walls up. They settled into separate rooms, vowing to go back to the hunt at first light.

***

I imagine heaven has a serene babbling brook. Where the water finds grateful lips and the stones are perfectly balanced. We've visited such a place before, and I knew I was a lucky man.

Love, Dad

Kensie burst into Jude's room, "How is this even possible? That this arrives on our meal trays, to the exact room number? This is bizarre."

He rubbed the sleep from his eyes, "He must've been extremely prepared." Kensie sat beside him, picking at his food.

"How long exactly did he know he was sick?" asked Jude.

"Months at least." said Kensie.

Jude pushed aside the food. He no longer felt hungry.

"I can't believe he kept it a secret for so long..." Kensie sobbed. "I don't know why he....should've told somebody sooner....should've let us in."

Jude swallowed the lump in his throat. He didn't move again until she was calm.

Kensie emerged from the room in a flurry of determination. They visited a shack full of rental hiking gear and replenishments. They were to search for the brook that sliced through the towering mountain. The brook was a well-known spot. They had accomplished the hike long ago.

"How long do you think until we see the brook?" asked Kensie.

"Two more hours roughly," said Jude.

She groaned. Jude had underestimated the water supply needed for the trip. He felt his muscles weakening with each step.

"Did we make a wrong turn?" asked Kensie.

"This is the trail the guides told us to take to reach the brook. It has to be here. We can't afford to slow down now."

"I can't handle getting lost. If this is payback for the last time, it's not funny."

Jude cackled, "That was my plan all along."

She eyed him warily.

Kensie squealed at first sight of the brook. They cupped the water with their hands and drank till their bellies were full. They splashed each other and dunked their faces. A crescendo of maniacal laughter spread, and they ran about like children again.

"Hey!" shouted Jude, pointing across the brook.

A man stood thirty yards away, clutching a wooden chest.

"GET BACK HERE!" yelled Jude. Kensie looked faint. "If you so much as think about following me, I'll knock you on the head myself," demanded Jude. He chased the man through the trees, flinging branches out of his way. With one tackle, both men rolled down the terrain. Jude hit his head hard on the ground. The man sprawled out next to him heaved like an animal.

"Give that back! Just who in the hell are you?" He asked. "You don't deserve it, coward!" the man yelled.

"Are you insane? That thing you're carrying was left here by my father. It belongs to us."

The man snarled, "No! You weren't there! We spent his last days by his side while you ran away! We rubbed his back and changed his sheets! We took care of everything! While his only son left him in his time of need!"

Jude punched him square in the jaw and they wrestled. He pinned the man to the ground.

"How do you know my father?"

"Ask your sister." said the man.

Jude released him and snatched the chest. "Never speak of him across your undeserving lips again. Go, you idiot! Or I'll make you!"

Jude watched him as he limped down, mumbling curses under his breath. The chest was heavy. He fought the urge to open it right there.

"You got the chest?" asked Kensie.

Jude's body went numb. "Did you set me up?!"

She pursed her lips. "You can't deny the truth brother, you may have been Daddy's favorite when we were young, but you failed to step up when it got rough."

"Are you joking? You can't project your insecurity about the years you abandoned us both onto me." snapped Jude. "Besides, he pushed me away because he didn't want his son to watch him die a slow and painful death."

"But you didn't have to listen. You could've tried to help anyway."

"And you could've been a part of our lives during his healthy years. You want the money?" Jude dumped the chest at her feet. "Take it, it's not worth anything to me."

"Then why come at all? Why did you ask me?"

"I wanted a chance to make amends. And since I can't do that with Dad. All I have left is you."

Kenzie fell to her knees, "I thought you hated me. I thought you only brought me here to get your money."

"I could never hate you. Even though we spent years apart I never wished anything but the best for you. Look at where it got me," scoffed Jude.

"Then why did you never reach out? After Dad died, I never heard anything. I felt like I lost you both."

"The pain. I wasn't ready to face it. Stepping away gave me space to come to terms with his terminal diagnosis. I thought I had more time. Thought it would sink in and I'd be able to sit by his side day after day without wanting to die too. It never happened."

"I hope you know I didn't want to steal the chest. It wasn't even my idea." she plead. "the man you saw was his in-home nurse. When you didn't show, we had to hire help. Then he began obsessed with the money and convinced me you would steal it. I'm sorry."

"If you really want it, have it," said Jude, turning his back on her.

"It's yours. I was detached for years from him. You shared something special that I could never understand. If Dad were here, he'd agree that out of both of his kids, you were the one who made him happiest."

"We both made mistakes but we lost our father to cancer and there's no way out but through pain, guilt, regret, and eventually acceptance." The last part of the sentence caught in his throat. "I'm open to forgiveness if you are," said Jude.

Kensie ran to her brother and hugged him. "I forgive you."

Jude let the tears come, "I forgive you too."

A minute passed as they gathered themselves.

"We could always wait until we turn 50 and split it? If we haven't killed each other by then." scoffed Kensie.

"Why wait?" asked Jude.

"The true treasure comes from the journey," she smiled. "Although...law school is expensive," said Kenzie.

"You're studying law?!" asked Jude.

"Something like that."

"Why not tell me this before?"

"I never wanted to make this trip about me paying for school."

"What did you want?" asked Jude.

"What all the gold in the world could never buy."