After the Battle of the Bulge

“Hands up!” The American sentry said.

“Yes, Corporal.” I comply when a rifle points at me.

“You talk funny.”

“I am English,” I said. “Is it you who ‘talks funny?”

“What do we have here?” said an arriving sergeant.

“Guy says he’s English. But I think he’s a German spy.”

“I’m English,” I said. “But I lived in the States before the war.”

“Oh yeah?” said the sergeant. “Who won the 1939 World Series.”

“No idea. But I starred with Ginger Rogers in Bachelor Mother that year.”

“What did you say your name was?”

“Niven. Lieutenant Colonel David Niven.”