A thing of beauty.

You would never know it from looking at me now, but I was beautiful once. I literally sparkled. I was full of life, always the center of attention. Anyone who stopped by to visit would inevitably find their way to me and hang out for a while.

I can’t say precisely when it happened, it was such a gradual change. One missed cleaning, a little longer between them in general. Soon there was an odor about me. The life I was responsible for suffered. The most fragile of them could not survive. They succumbed to the changes in me. No longer a thing of beauty I am forgotten, abandoned. Nothing healthy remains and even the heartiest of my charges could handle it. I am become death.

With the last of the occupants gone, I am sure that I am next to go. No reason to keep me around now.

My once clear and shining surface was dull and covered with decayed growth slowing drying up as the water within evaporated. No one comes to care for me. I wait for the day I will be put out of my misery.

The day has come. I am carried out by two strong men. They look ill from the stench, I am mortified. I look forward to no longer existing. They take me out behind the house that was my palace and dump out the foulness within me, then back out front to be discarded. I am set on the ground a few feet from the road.

As I wait to see the grim reaper appear for me, I see more things appear from my past. The sitting couch and wooden chairs with the padded seats that people would sit in to admire me bring such a wave of longing for the glory days. Am I now to be mocked? Is not my appearance enough torture?

Soon I am surrounded by the things I remember and even more I have never seen, all of us gathered in what must surely be a funeral pyre or gravesite.

I am confused. As morning turns to afternoon there are people, so many people! They are here to pay tribute, a memorial service befitting my early years. I am moved beyond words. They walk past and look at me with looks of sorrow, or disgust? I can’t blame them. I was not properly prepared for a viewing. I hear a few of them asking the director about me. “How big is it?” they asked.

“Hundred twenty gallons”

“Is there a base and filter?”

“Base is still in the library, it was too heavy to move without a crew. Filter is shot.”

“I’ll take it, with the base. I’ll have a truck come by this afternoon.”

I am intrigued, but unsure what to expect. Before long, a truck pulls up and four large men go into the house and in a few minutes are coming out with my base! They load it on the lift gate of the truck and soon it disappears inside. Now they are standing around me, one makes a gagging sound. I want to hide.

Two of them (that didn’t gag) lift me into the air and I am brought into the truck where I now see my base wrapped in a blanket and strapped to the wall. I am laid on a blanket myself and covered with another. I can’t see, but can hear them close up the truck and soon I feel movement.

I am gripped with fear. The bouncing threatens my integrity, but I survive. The truck has stopped and I am uncovered. They take me out of the truck into an open ended covered room. They set me down on the concrete floor and lay me on my side. One of them pulls a hose from the wall and turns it on me! I am pummeled by the water pressure. Oh Glory! The water is blasting away the buildup of death and decay. There is now a soap being deployed from the hose. I am covered in foam. From somewhere a brush starts to scrub away the worst of it and then the water again to rinse away the sludge. Tipped upside down long enough to get the side I was laying on and I feel renewed. They put me back on the truck and I hear comments from the men of how impressive I look. I beam with pride. The next leg of the journey brings me to my new home. My base is taken in first but not before I see them rub it down with cloths until its rich wood grain is brought back to life. The sun shining on it reveals its beauty as the men take it through the door.

I am taken in next and reunited with my base. The room is brightly lit and clean. So different from the darkened room I occupied for so long. I am in the middle of the room and there are chairs all around the walls for people to sit in and admire me. Not as fancy as the ones from before, but padded and placed for maximum occupancy.

The two men are back with sponges and cloths, they spray me with a solution from a bottle and get to a deep cleaning. I am revived. I have not shown like this for years. Soon I feel the water filling me as I see a filtration pump mounted in my base. The power is on and the water is moving, circulating, pulsing, my heartbeat is now strong. A heater turns on and my temperature rises. I had forgotten what it was to be warm. It feels good.

There is a bucket gently poured out into me with stone? No, it is crushed coral! That can only mean one thing. The next bucket is poured into me and I taste salt. After the second pour is emptied, measurements are taken and a little more at a time of the brine solution added until it is just right. Things are moving now. Live rock is added and arranged, plants are placed in the crushed coral. Temperatures are watched, specific gravity is measured for the salt level and soon, they start to pack up and shine my surface. The hum of a compressor and the sound of bubbles fill my being.

Night has come and a new light is switched on at my crown. My body is all but invisible it is so clean. The rocks are arranged like a mini reef and the plants sway gently in the currents from the filter. The new motor is whisper quiet and the bubbles break the surface of the water with a pleasing sound.

A face appears and takes a long look. A slow walk around as he stares at every angle. Finally a smile appears on his face. There is no one else in the room so I know he is addressing me directly when he speaks.

“Well old gal, you are really something. My guys thought I was joking when they went to pick you up from the estate sale. I had no doubts you would rise to the occasion. The base alone is magnificent, but with you all shined up and pristinely cleaned, wow. I can’t wait to get you stocked.”

With that he puts on his coat, turns off the lights, and departs.

The next day I am alone. I don’t mind so much, I am ‘pristine’. I like the sound of that. The live rock is filtering the water almost as much as the system in my base. I can sense the presence of life hiding in the small spaces within. The following morning and the man who poured out the buckets is back with small vials and gadgets to take my vitals. He reads off the numbers to himself,

“Temperature is perfect. Specific gravity just a touch high, but will still drop a bit naturally. PH is optimal for salt, just a bit higher than neutral. I think we are ok for acclimation.”

He goes and finds the man who must be the head of this house and gives him the news. The man is obviously excited and sends him on his way. A small group of women arrive and take a look at me before heading through the only other door in the room besides the one I came in through. There is a small window on the same wall you can’t see through, yet it doesn’t appear to be dirty, how odd. I see the figure of one of the women who came in to see me on the other side of the window moving about. Another walks to the corner of the room I’m in and turns on a box in the corner near the ceiling. The front glass lights up and images are shown on it. There is music and laughter coming from it, then a man I can’t see narrates something that will “relieve your symptoms” better than anything else. The woman goes back through the second door and I am alone again, but not for long. Soon people are coming in. they go to the little window and wait for the woman to open it. They speak and exchange pleasantries for a moment then they come and sit to watch me. The first two visitors stare for a while before the lady mentions to the man, “There’s no fish.” Then they turn to look at the box on the wall. I feel naked all of a sudden. Empty.

It is another hour and several more rude comments from strangers about my lack of occupants before the man from this morning is back with a partner. They are carrying a blue chest with a white lid. They set it next to me and open my cover. From the chest they take a dozen large clear bags full of colorful tropical fish, and set them floating in me. I remember this, they let the water in the bags come to the same temperature as the water I contain. The bags are bobbing gently in my currents and bumping into each other. The fish stare at each other and look around beneath them. The two men remove the chest from the room and come back to the little window. There are a few words spoken and the woman comes out from behind the door and walks up to me. She studies the bobbing bags and their contents and asks how much longer. The man tells her a good 15 minutes should do, and he leaves.

The latest group of people to arrive to see me includes a small child. I don’t like the way he is looking at me. His fingers look wet and sticky with who knows what, and he looks very touchy feely. As soon as the adults with him sit down he is up and over to me like a shot. Both hands pressed up against my side, his nose touching between them. He is looking up at the floating bags like he wants one before the man calls him back to the chairs. He leaves his mark on me. Two sticky had prints and I don’t even want to think what the small thing stuck on me between them is.

Once they are taken back behind the second door, the woman from behind the glass window appears wearing gloves and carrying a bottle and a paper towel. She sprays the child’s remnants and wipes them away. I like her more and more. She looks at her watch and says the time is right. One by one she opens the bags and releases the contents into the expanse of their new domain. Some just float for a moment, others take off looking for cover. A couple start to chase each other around. The bags are gone, the lid is closed, the drips and splashes are wiped away. The new occupants are exploring and testing the boundaries. I am complete.

The rest of the day as people came in I hear comments made to the woman behind the glass. How beautiful I am, what a nice addition, it makes the wait more tolerable. What kind of fish is this one or that one, the list goes on.

I am grateful for the man who brought me here, he looked upon me in my stench and misery and saw my inner beauty. He has given me new life and purpose. The people come from morning until late afternoon five days a week. Different people each day and they all gather around and watch the fish within. I never dreamed so many would come to see me. They stay for an hour or so then when called by the lady behind the window they go back through the other door. I presume to thank the man who brought me here for inviting them over to see me.

As for the man, he stops by every morning and says hello, he opens the lid to feed the fish. He stops by every afternoon to do the same. Once a week I get a visit from the man who brought the buckets or one of his partners. They measure and check my vitals to make sure I am healthy. Once a month in the morning they will come and drain off part of my water and refill it with fresh salty water. Always measuring levels and making sure everything is good.

The live rock has produced a couple pencil urchins and a snail came out of hiding and started cleaning the walls. The pair of yellow tang have nested and it looks like some of the eggs are going to hatch. Most were eaten by aggressive fish who were looking for a change of diet. I hope some of them survive to carry on. There seems to be no end of people stopping bye to see me.

I think back on how I was ready to give up. I was looking forward to an end to my miserable existence. How wrong I was to think that I was worthless. My circumstances were bleak, but someone took a chance on me and gave me a better life than I could have imagined. I would have missed out on so much joy if not for the change in circumstances.

If you are in a dark place, feeling like your life is over, like you are full of misery and decay, don’t give up. Look for a change of circumstances. Hose out the nastiness that is hiding your beauty. Look for new people who will lift you up and help you clean yourself up. You can shine again. You can be full of life and new light like me. You can have new purpose and bring joy to those you meet, if you don’t give up.

Once you have cleaned out all the things that hid your beauty, come and see me. Sit for a while and watch the life within me. Let your lite shine with mine. I look forward to seeing you.