A Guide Through The Darkness

There it is again. With that hellish and piercing shriek. It is terrifying to think that something out there sees me as prey, and I feel almost as if it is taunting me. Is it looking for me? Is it calling to me? Ugh... this overwhelming sense of dread, this fear of the unknown it's unbearable. What do you want? Where are you? I can definitely hear it, but it is nowhere to be seen.

So alone. I feel so alone here with my thoughts, trying to figure out why do I feel so scared. No. Anger. Anger is what I feel. I'm angry that I can't figure out why I ended up in this situation. So stupid. I should have listened. It was raining, and I knew it was dangerous to go out there alone but... there it is again! That annoying noise. Show yourself! It's cold, and it's dark. At least... at least talk to me. Please.

It's getting late, and it's getting colder. I'm so sorry. So sorry for all the harm done. I don't know why I'm thinking like this, it's possible that all this silence is causing me to rethink everything. Every mistake, every harsh decision. I don't know, I... an owl? Is that what it's been all this time?

There it is. Perched on a tree branch right over me. It's looking at me, judging me. That's the last thing I need. This dumb animal just staring at me without saying anything. I should be laughing, though. If there's someone dumb here is me. So eerie. Those black, piercing eyes. I believe they called them barn owls. It's funny, really, like someone hiding behind a mask. Why isn't it making any noises anymore? I kind of miss it. At least, it was like someone was calling for me all this time.

No! Don't' leave! It started to fly into the darkness. So beautiful. Those white wings blocking the view of the moon and the stars. It's talking again. It's talking to me. To the darkness. It is making me feel... better? The only time I felt this way was when I talked with my sister. So full of wisdom. She was younger than me, but she took care of me. So fearless, so strong, so smart. I miss her.

God, this owl reminds me so much of her. I was always intimated by her ability to instill confidence in everything she did. I was so jealous for not having those qualities. So much time wasted in trying to hamper her progress, her potential; instead of trying to learn something from her. Just like that owl. No matter what, it will fly and own the night sky, and just like my sister, could have given up on me - she had every right to do so - this owl simply won't leave me here alone.

I don't deserve its company. Listen to me. Always wallowing in self pity. I'm pathetic. The owl knows it, but it is still there, perched on that branch staring at me. Does it feel sorry for me? No. It's there waiting, just... waiting.

Waiting. I'm tired of waiting. Waiting for life. Waiting for it to tell me when it went wrong. I'm tired. At least, it doesn't hurt anymore.

You're back! My winged friend, my silent companion. Thank you for being here. I hear them. Steps. I can hear the branches laying on the grass cracking with each footstep.

"Over here!" I hear a man yelling into the void. I can't see them but I can hear them. A group of people.

"It's been ten days, but we finally found him"

Ten days? I guess, that's why I can't remember anything. In fact, I don't remember anything until that barn owl started talking to me.

Did you call them? I wonder. All I can see is that bird staring at me, almost as if it... is it nodding?

Thank you, my friend. For being in the shadows all this time, taking care of me. Looking out for me. You made me think of everything good in my life. Yes, I made mistakes, but I guess that's part of it, right? It doesn't matter. I'm no longer angry. No longer sad. No longer afraid. I learned that life can move on without me. Here, laying on the ground staring at the night sky, I finally found peace.

Sneaky little creature. Behind that mask, behind that emotionless visage, there was so much wisdom, so much compassion. You never left me alone, you never gave up on me, and that's just it. You made me realize that there are people in this life that are here to help others to achieve their goals. We are the supporting cast. My sister made it, and I'm so proud of her.

It's never to late, I guess. To find a different perspective. Good things don't need to happen to you to have a good life. To enjoy life. I never saw it, but this amazing creature made me realize that even though this wasn't the end I imagined for myself, I lived my life with passion and with people that really cared for me, and loved me. I wish for you the same.

I think I can rest now. It is talking again! It is saying farewell. It is flying away. One last good-bye.

Thank you, my friend. This is the best gift anyone could've given me.