A Bulls#*t Love Story

"Babe, you home? I got us Chinese food," Z called out as he entered the apartment. "Chelsea?" Z placed the takeout bag on the counter and walked into the bedroom. Chelsea wasn't there, but he saw that the closet door was open and her clothes were all missing. He walked back into the kitchen and noticed a note on the fridge.

Z,

I'm sorry to do this, but things just haven't felt right for a long time now. I tried to stick it out, as I know we planned to build a life together. But this isn't what I thought it would be. I need to go and find myself and figure out what it is I want. I will always care for you and I hope that you find someone great, but I can't be that someone for you anymore.

Chelsea

Z crumpled the letter up in anger the second he finished reading it. He hung is head down for a second before picking up the Chinese takeout and throwing it as hard as he could against the wall, exploding chow mein and General Tso's all over the room.

After sitting in silence for some time, fighting back the tears of heartache and disbelief, Z rushed back into the bedroom, grabbed a duffel bag out of the closet, started ripping clothes off of hangers and stuffing them into the bag. Less than 10 minutes later, he was on the road headed absolutely nowhere in particular, driving purely on instinct, with his mind lightyears away and his engine floored as if he were hurrying to catch up to it.

Hours passed as Z drove through the night, into the desert. He went through an emotional rollercoaster in his mind, and never even stopped to think about the fact that he was supposed to be at work in the morning. As dawn broke, he started to get tired and he noticed a small western town just off the highway. He took the exit and pulled up to a local motel to get a room.

The Sleepy Steer Inn was completely vacant with only one vehicle in the parking lot, presumably belonging to a staff member. Z walked through the front doors which were cheaply made replicas of the old swing-hinged, batwing saloon doors. The lobby was adorned in rustic décor, with a large taxidermied brown bear acting as the door greeter. As he approached the front desk, he stared directly at the large bull skull hanging on the wall, and thought how accurately it reflected the amount of life within the place. Z rang the bell on the counter, and instantly in a sort of magical, David Copperfield type of way, a woman appeared out of nowhere, as if she had just crawled out from under the desk.

"Hello, Sir. How may I help you?" she said.

"I need a room...for a few days maybe...I'm not really sure," Z replied.

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After some much needed rest, Z woke up and stared up at the stain on the ceiling above the bed for a bit, replaying old memories in his head and searching for signs that he may have missed, which might have prevented Chelsea's unexpected departure. Finally in the late evening, Z stirred from his room and walked into the town to find a place to get a drink.

Z located a small saloon-style bar down the street called the Frisky Whiskey Tavern. The bartender greeted him and as he was pouring his beer he realized he only had one hand, the other being a two-prong pincher type prosthetic. Z looked to the corner of the bar where only two other bar patrons were sitting. One heavy set man in a white t-shirt and matching 10-gallon cowboy hat was playing chess with another extremely skinny man in in a full blue-jean Canadian tuxedo. The larger man had a bandana around his neck and a device in his hand which he touched to his throat and spoke in a robotic sounding voice, "Checkmate". The skinnier fella looked like he hadn't eaten in months and was completely covered in what appeared to be oil or soot, or possibly both. Z couldn't help but wonder what kind of freak show town he had stumbled into.

"So what brings you to our little town stranger? Lost? Just passing through?" asked the bartender.

"Just getting away." replied Z.

"From what?" pried the bartender.

"Life I guess," said Z.

"Well you came to the right place." said the bartender as he poured two shots of tequila and passed one to Z. "Folks here call me Blue Rabb. What's your name?"

"Call me Z." he replied.

"What's the Z stand for?" asked Rabb.

"Xavier," replied Z.

Blue Rabb paused, mouthing the name "Xavier" trying to find the Z. Xavier could see his confusion and used the opening, "Why Blue Rabb?" he asked.

Rabb reached behind the bar and handed Z a blue rabbit's foot on a chain. "Keep it. It's good luck," he said. "You look like you might could use it. Looks like you might could use another one of these too," he added as he poured up two more shots, and toasted him.

"Thanks...I guess," replied Z, as he tossed back the shot. "What's there to do in this town?"

"You're looking at it," Rabb quipped. "You ever ride?"

"No, I don't much care for motorcycles," Z replied.

Blue Rabb laughed. "Let me show you something," he said, urging Z to follow him out back of the bar.

Rabb led Z over to a large metal building, and they entered into an office. In the office was a huge trophy case full of awards and ribbons, and pictures of horses, bulls, and cowboys covered every inch of the walls. "This is what we do here," Rabb exclaimed. "We Rodeo!"

Rabb handed a picture in a frame over to Z. The picture showed Rabb dressed up as a full rodeo clown, being chased by a bull. Z figured there was no reason to ask about the missing hand anymore, as he could pretty much figure out the answer. "Come with me. I want to introduce you to someone," said Rabb.

They walked out of the office and into a giant rodeo arena with large bleachers on either side. In the middle the large dirt arena, was a woman riding on a horse. As they got closer he recognized her. "That's the girl from the Inn I'm staying at up the road," he said.

"That's Tess. Don't let her pretty face and small size fool you. She's tough as they come," said Rabb. "Her twin sister Bess, runs the Steer Inn. They are identical in looks, but Tess got all the personality."

"Hey Tess! Come over here and meet my new friend. His name is Xavier, spelled with a Z," Rabb called out.

"Well, hey there Zavier. Nice to meet you. My sister Bess told me there was some handsome stranger staying at the Inn. She might need glasses," joked Tess.

"You can just call me Z," he replied.

Blue Rabb chimed in, "Oh, now I get it. The Z is silent!"

"How long you in town for? You here to see the rodeo tomorrow night?" asked Tess.

"I really don't have any plans or anything. Kind of just getting away and clearing my head for a bit," said Z.

"Oh, so you're a runaway. Some girl break your heart or something?" asked Tess.

"Something like that," he replied.

"You ever ride a horse before? Wanna give it a try?" she asked.

"Umm...yeah, ok."

Tess curled her lip in and let out a loud whistle, and the horse came trotting right over. "This is Millie," said Tess. She hopped right onto Millie's back and Blue Rabb helped Z get on behind her. "Just wrap your arms around me and hold on tight," she said.

Millie started trotting around slowly with Tess and Z riding on her back. Z was holding on rather tightly at first, but once he realized it wasn't so scary, he loosened up a bit. "So what exactly do you do in the rodeo," he asked.

"This," she said and she gave Millie a kick, signaling her to pickup the speed. Millie ran and pranced about, interchanging her steps and stride like she was dancing in a horse ballet. Z laughed gleefully and began to ease his nerves.

"Wow! You're really good at this," he said. "Never met a REAL cowgirl before. Guess I pictured you more of like a rodeo cheerleader."

Tess, smirked in response and pulled back on the horse reigns. Millie arched back and raised her front hooves high up in the air, almost at a complete 90-degree vertical. Since Z was no longer holding on tightly, he slid right off the back of Millie and hit the ground with a thud, faceplanting right in a large pile of dung.

Tess and Blue Rabb laughed hysterically, as Tess dismounted from Millie and walked over to Z, now covered in dirt and feces. "What in the hell did you do that for?" Z exclaimed.

"Sounded like bullshit to me. Wouldn't you know...looks and smells like it too," Tess joked. "C'mon tough guy, let's get you cleaned up."

She walked Z over near the feeding trough area, turned the spigot connected to a hose, and began spraying him off. Z looked absolutely miserable as the mud and animal waste washed off of his designer jeans. Afterwards, the two laughed and joked as they walked together back to the Inn so that Z could shower and change clothes.

Tess and Z stayed up late that night talking and getting to know one another, until eventually Tess had to get home to bed so that she could have enough energy to prepare for the rodeo. Z was highly intrigued and excited to see the whole event, so much so that the thought of the breakup with Chelsea and his life back home had faded from his mind almost entirely. He may have fallen off the horse, but he was suddenly ready to hop back on and ride again.

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The next day, the tiny, middle-of-nowhere town was quite the sight to see. Vehicles rolled in off the freeway in waves, many of which pulling trailers with horses, bulls, and more, all coming to see and participate in the evening's events. The Inn was packed with people, a far cry from the deserted "Bates Motel" that it had resembled when Z had checked-in just the day before. Bess was clearly overwhelmed at the check in desk, and Blue Rabb had come over to assist.

Back at the rodeo arena, there were cowboys, cowgirls and animals everywhere you looked. It was like a wild west circus! Z felt so out of place, as he was the only person not dressed in full western wear, that was until Tess showed up. Z was walking over from purchasing a corn-on-the-cobb from the concessions stand they had set-up, when he stopped to watch a cowboy practicing with his lasso. As Z stood in pure wonder, watching as the young cowboy twisted and twirled his rope in ways that totally defied gravity. Suddenly, Tess snuck up behind him and placed a cowboy hat on his head. It initially startled him, causing him to spin around a bit quicker than either of them expected, leaving them nearly nose-to-nose in a slightly awkward moment, overwhelmingly prodding of intimacy.

The two laughed, as Z picked a blade of long grass, placed it in his teeth, tipped his hat and said, "Howdy Ma'am...How do I look?"

"Perfect," she said. "Starting to fit right in."

"Good thing," he said. "I actually was just thinking I might stick around a while."

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