who I am

I recently turned 45 years old and although I have been an avid fan of the written word my entire life and have written on various platforms it was joining Vocal that made me want to pick up my voice again. I didn't want to be a writer to make money I was so glad to know that all of my writing can be found on the internet because it's that imprint that will be my legacy.

Sure, to pay the bills I am a success but it's the written word that always gets my attention and emotions stirring. Four years now I picked up a paint brush for the very same reason because when I pass away, and I must one day that finding over 5k works of art will be the fete that transcends my time on Earth.

Now who I am the person? Adventurous, pragmatic, slightly romantic man who want to use my time ensuring that I am seen in the light that isn't just a statistic of my traumatic childhood and abandoned adulthood. Because many don't understand why I was abandoned by my entire blood family and how I ever survived it without getting caught up in societies clutch hairs of racism and gun violence.

The only person I could compare my life with is that of Greta Garbo no not the Hollywood star of the Golden Age but the woman who just wanted to be "left alone" and although I cannot speak for her the reason, I want to be left alone is so that I won't get hurt, abandoned and left for dead. Some may think that this is extreme but is it really?

When as a child I was surrounded by not just trauma in my home but in my overall environment when others were enjoying sleepovers and first kisses, I was left to create this cocoon that protected me so that I had the chance to get away and make the life that I wanted so as much as I was/am abandoned I also abandoned them and that's what both sides have to reconcile and maybe one day it will happen.

Who am I the writer? Ever since the age of 9 along with reading books, doing well enough in school and biding my time writing was this way to create a world or environment in which I not only controlled but could live and love in.

My first story was Dawn and Tarnell who were star crossed lovers who could never be together because Dr Dwayne InSane was not only obsessed with them both, but he gave them powers that allowed them to kill each other even if they tried and of course they did.

That was the start of this hobby slash made up career that kept me thriving and now its called dissociative personality disorder but that is what saved me from the adults that did me harm and the siblings that never seemed to want me around and it just continued.

I wouldn't talk to anyone I would write instead but of course a child like myself most likely becomes a teenager that is either outspoken or full of heart and some even turn into sociopaths but God wiling the latter never transpired in my case, but I did continue to write, and I would take shows and recreate them with characters that were of color and eventually thanks to the age of the internet I was able to actually become a published writer and now we will go on this journey together.

Welcome to MY World ......