Most people as this question when they have or are are thinking about leaving their significant other. However, in this case I found myself asking this question with no such intention and it was not directed towards my husband either. Lately its been more directed to my family as a whole, my husband and our two little girls. Before I got married I was independent and doing things for my self. I was involved with groups that I liked and had time to do my favorite hobbies. But after I got married I was no longer just doing things for myself. I had someone else to think about and take care of. Especially once we had children. As our family grew I learned that I was giving up more and more of myself to take care of my family and keep everyone happy. Most moms can relate with this because we are for the most part the homemakers in the family and hardly find time for ourselves and for the family. So it when it comes down to it we typically choose what the family wants or needs over what we want or need. And this is how we can lose ourselves before we even know it.
I sometimes wonder if I didn't have this family what would I be doing with my life? Do I see myself staying in the city that I am in or do I think I would live in a completely different part of the world? And if I did would I still end up marrying the man I did? Would I still have the hobbies that I used to or would I have new ones that I prefer? These are questions I ask myself between tea parties and diaper changes. So much of my time is given to take care of my little girls especially since my husband works and I stay home with them. I take care of them all day long. When he comes home I tend to cook dinner and take care of the kids so they don't bother him to much so he can relax from his long day. Then when it's bed time I remind him and the oldest child to go to bed several times before they actually make it to the bedroom and I stay up with the youngest to prepare her for bed once everyone is out of the room. All my time is spent by this time that I just want to fall asleep and run away for a moment. But I know if I do that that I would have no idea what I would do.
The few moments that I get out of the house to run errands I try to think of things that I would do if it was just me. Which it never is. I always have one or both girls with me every time I leave the house. But the point is I have no idea what I would do. Its been so long since I've had any real time for me that I'm not sure. If I didn't have this family who would I be? I want to find out just who I am again. So I am going to start a series called "Who Am I, Without You?" so that I can share my journey to find myself without my family. I don't mean that I want to leave my family, because that is something I could never do. I love my family very much. But I do want to find myself again. And what fun would that be to rediscover your likes and dislikes? What makes you happy? Just because I have a family that I have to take care of doesn't mean I need to keep sacrificing myself for them all the time. Sometimes I just need a little break to enjoy myself. And I am sure many people can relate.
Mom life is hard. But it doesn't mean we love our families any less. Mom's just need time to themselves sometimes. This way we know who we are as a person and not just as a mother or wife. Because we are so much more than just that. And we deserve to be able to express ourselves in ways that make us happy to. Please stay tuned for the next article in the series.
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The Dragons Return
There weren't always dragons in the Valley. Growing up we were taught that they had all disappeared a long time ago. These creatures were considered to be pure because they did not hoard gold or treasure as most would believe, but they would only associate themselves with people that were pure in heart. They had this ability that allowed them to look at a person and see who that person truly was. You can fool others into believing you're a good person or look like trouble but dragons could never be fooled.
By Valerie Myers2 years ago in Fiction
Hitting Golfballs with Baseball Bats
“Ting!” the sound of metal against whatever golf balls are made from (I looked it up the outer layer is called “surlyn.”). But that’s not important, what is important is that sound. That’s the sound I keep hearing in my head. Along with low chatter of male voices. Most often three and occasionally joined with other voices. I grew up in a valley, along with relatives living in nearby houses. My grandparents were beside of me and on their other side was my grandma’s aunt and her family. Then later on after a divorce my uncle moved in between those two. Family was close almost constantly. I had both parents. My grandparents next door were always there, and their middle son lived with them. Then as I said their youngest son moved back in with them and then beside of them when I was pretty young. My sister and I were quite literally raised by a village. There is a whole lot of family I could discuss and all are important and special in their own ways but I want to talk about those golf balls specifically. My dad at some point before I can remember started a game where he and his best friend, my oldest cousin on my mom’s side, along with any other person around who wanted to play, would hit golf balls with baseball bats. The valley we lived in was so large and at the back there is a huge field and then a large hill with forest on it. This whole property was owned by my grandparents. Do you know how far golfballs will travel when you hit them with a baseball bat? They go very far, very very far. At least when someone good at it hits them, mine never even made it as far as the creek.
By Raine fielder6 days ago in Families
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After a long day in the department, Emily dropped her worn and tired dark leather bag on the counter before navigating through the small and disordered kitchen to grab a cold beer from a contrarily empty fridge. She hadn't had a chance to unpack since moving from Newcastle to Glasgow, let alone shop for sustenance, except for cold brews naturally.
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