The role of mothers in parenting roles

Being a good and competent parent is an art, and it depends on each person's practice. When it comes to parenting, the role of both parents is very important. Both have a significant influence on the growth of their children. Here we share the topic of the influence of mothers on the upbringing of their children by the director of the Psychological Consultation Institute, Lee Shun Wai, which may be beyond everyone's imagination.

Mom and dad are like two pillars

According to Director Lee, fathers and mothers are two important pillars in a family. In the process of a child's growth, if there is a lack of care and teaching from fathers, the child may lack goals and motivation for the future, which will lead to two extremes. One is timid and cowardly in character, while the other becomes irritable and irritable.

The mother is the first person the child comes into contact with, and she is also the person the child is most interested in other than herself. The mother is the first link that connects the child to society. Without a mother's parenting, a child is likely to become a relatively inexpressive person, pretending to be strong when it is difficult to express their vulnerable side.

Lack of mother's environment

In real life, it is very difficult to meet fathers who have the qualities of both men and women. Many children raised by single fathers usually seem to know only work, or only care about achievements, and only work or achievements are the most important things for them, and there is very little emotional communication with each other at home.

When growing up and going out and having a partner, this will often be the case, when two people who love each other are together, they are often asked: you have to talk to me more, you have to have some communication with me. Even together, are mutually feel the difficulty of communication, but for them, they have been very serious, very hard, but because of the habits developed from childhood, growing up in an environment that makes them have little experience of emotional communication with their father.

Because of the lack of mothers growing up, they interact with their fathers, but some fathers usually do not have much emotional communication, so they are in a working mode, such as what to bring, how to eat, what to do, all become very business-like.

There is also a situation where both parents are present, but the mother is not the kind of person who is very good at interacting with the child, the mother usually follows the father, the father seems to be the chief, the child you want to how, if the child does not do, the mother does not change the angle of more flexible to explain, but echoes, you have to listen to what the father said, even if the father in the process of explaining clearly, the mother is just a few words, a generation and passed, or listen to what the father said. Still listen the child's father said.

This kind of mother, in the child, grows up, the child in a way will be very envious of other people's families, envy that very harmonious atmosphere, but in their own family is difficult, he is also very difficult to do.

The director of the Institute, Mr. Li Unwed, said that such a family is difficult for children, and will become a fixed pattern in the family, called the family inheritance culture the role of the father and mother are more balanced to be good, that is, both roles have.

Single parents need to have the traits of both roles

According to Mr. Lee, the key to having the qualities of both parental roles, whether father or mother, lies in the transformation of one's mentality. As children, they have different needs at different ages. When they are young, they need more care from their mothers, and as they grow older, they need more gravity from their fathers.

So, for children in single-parent families, when the child is small, the father or mother, to be a little more maternal role, communication with the child, comfort, and care are very important to the child, and as the child grows up, these roles embodied behavior can be slowly hidden withdrawal, and transformed into is the goal, patience, problem solving and direction of life, etc.

And for children who have reached the age of adolescence, it is necessary to give them discipline along with comfort. The role of both sexes is that of a flexible mom and dad, with some requirements but somehow, flexible boundaries that allow the child to relax but also have a bottom line.

For example, people will have their requirements for future achievements or events, so can there be some flexibility and space for the child, that is, there is some degree of requirement for the child, but at the same time there is a flexible boundary, allowing the child to relax, but there is also a limit. In modern society, there is a growing trend of having both sexes in roles, and although it is still a minority, it is gradually increasing.

The role of both sexes is more like a practice

Some people may wonder whether this kind of gender role should be studied and practiced to enrich their specialization.

"I think it's similar to a kind of practice, if you don't realize that you are too much, for example, you can't express your vulnerability, or you don't realize that you have to let people cherish you or take care of you, but you don't have a stronger side. This way the lessons are no longer useful, the most important thing is to be aware of the feeling, aware and then learn, its help will be great."

To put it playfully, to be a human being is to recognize one's fate, to figure out what one's fate is, then one can make up for the missing part of oneself, if one is not even aware of it, more lessons are just a knowledge. Understand yourself, and look back at yourself, to do better.

So as parents in the education of their children, we must first realize their responsibility and importance to their children, constantly enrich ourselves, better appreciate and realize the role of both sexes, integrate into the child, and guide the child's healthy growth while considering the child's feelings. The two pillars of family education should work together.