The Hilarious Requests For Help From My Daughter

My daughter is brilliant, beautiful, funny, and endearingly helpless at times.

She's not genuinely helpless, but she likes to call a parent as her first course of action. She used to call so frequently her father worried about her ability to live in the Los Angeles area on her own. Now, as she finishes her final year of law school, I know he is smiling down on her from heaven, and I am answering her calls.

Car trouble

Sierra is one of the smartest young ladies I know, as is her sister, Camille. I tell them they get that from their father. Thankfully they think I helped a little too. We sent her to Long Beach in an ancient Saturn that cost $2,000. The Saturn was not a quality car. Problems were inevitable.

In 2014, during her first few months of college, Sierra would call whenever she had an issue with her car. I only know the basics of car maintenance, so those calls usually went to Patrick. They had equal levels of patience with each other, so the calls were generally very tense. Patrick would tell her what she needed to do, and she would panic if it involved actually doing anything.

In December 2014, I happened to be in Los Angeles, in the car with her, when it started having problems. I don't remember the exact issue, but I know it was stalling in the middle of traffic. Sierra was in hysterics asking what she was supposed to do. I tried to keep her calm while calling Patrick to get advice. We finally pulled over and called a tow truck. A few days and hundreds of dollars later, Patrick drove the car home to Clovis for the final time.

After that issue, Patrick told me he wasn't sure Sierra was ready to be four hours away at school. We bought her a more reliable car a few weeks later, which resolved the issues and the calls for the time being. Thankfully her father stopped suggesting she come home.

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Apartment maintenance

The next summer, she moved into an apartment with five other girls. One morning she called as I was getting ready for work.

"Mom, the power is out. What should I do?" she said when I answered the phone.

"Did you call the property manager?" I asked.

"I don't know what I would say," she responded.

"Ummm, tell them the power is out?" I replied in confusion.

"Mom, you know I don't like to talk on the phone. I need to take a shower to get to class on time. And I probably won't be able to dry my hair," she said in her 'I'm on the edge of tears voice.'

"Well, I guess you'll just have to drive home," I stated.

Usually, that's all it would take. Sierra would quickly realize she was making a mountain out of a molehill, and then she would do what she needed to do.

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Why do you need my location, mom?

When she returned to Long Beach for her 3rd year of college, I was her sole parent. We both needed each other, and I didn't mind the calls at all. However, when she started calling me while she walked from her car to her apartment in Long Beach, I realized I was providing no protection at all. I told her she needed to allow me to see her location, and she finally agreed. Knowing her location was a big relief.

On another occasion, Sierra called me in a panic because she had hit a parked car. As we argued over why she needed to leave a note, she realized there was damage to her side mirror, and the other car had no damage. Problem solved.

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Ghost at the door?

She graduated after her third year in Long Beach and returned home for a gap year. I was grateful for the company since her younger sister left for her first year at UC Davis. I didn't think I would get any panicky phone calls, but she made sure I knew she still needed me.

"Mom, are you still awake?" she texted.

"Yes, why?" I replied.

"Gidget is acting strange by the front door, and I think there's a ghost outside," she texted back.

Don't cats always act strange? I was not about to go looking for something spooky on our porch late at night. Luckily, I quickly downloaded an image from the front door camera showing another cat trying to communicate with Gidget through the door. No ghost. Problem solved.

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Two years ago, Sierra began law school. I was incredibly proud. My firstborn was spreading her wings and would soon be completely independent. Just not yet.

"Mom, there was a fire alarm, and we had to evacuate! I couldn't get Gidget to come out. What should I do?" she asked.

"You can't go back inside the building," I replied.

"But what if there's a real fire?" she responded.

"Sometimes, the only thing we can do is wait. The result will be the same, no matter how upset and stressed you are in the meantime. More than likely, everything will be fine," I answered.

Moments later, the fire department sounded the all-clear, and everything was fine. Problem solved.

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"Mom, the refrigerator is making a funny noise. What should I do?" she said.

"Don't open it! There's probably a demon inside or something!" I replied.

"Mom! Be serious!" she said in exasperation.

"Could it be the ice maker? If it doesn't get better, call maintenance." I told her.

"Mom, you know I hate to call maintenance! Oh, wait, the noise stopped. Ok, everything's fine," she replied.

Once again, the problem is solved without any actual intervention on my part.

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"Mom, don't laugh, but should I be worried the building next door is making a funny sound?" she asked.

"Well…it might be getting ready to head to the mother ship," I said.

"Mom! I'm serious! What if it's about to explode?" she replied.

"I think it's the air conditioner. (Listens to the sound on the video she sent) Definitely the air conditioner." I told her.

Problem solved.

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"Mom, this has been the worst day ever, and you won't believe what just happened!" she said.

Despite her panic calls' frequency, they always start with images of horrible things happening to my daughter going through my mind.

"What happened?" I asked.

"There was an earthquake! Five years living here, and I finally felt a big one!" she replied.

She went on to tell me what it was like, what was rattling, how the cat reacted. She didn't actually need anything from me, but something big happened, and I was the first person she called.

Sierra has always tended to panic when anything unexpected happens. Patrick and I used to wonder if she would ever be independent. When he died, I learned she was capable of much more than I could have ever expected. I laugh at her when she calls me, and then we laugh together. Sierra graduates next year, I know she's going to be an excellent lawyer. And, I know she's going to be just fine.