Teenagers

I know it can feel like big pressure to have “the sex talk” with your children, but I would approach it as many small talks while looking for teachable moments when they come up. Keep it simple, straightforward, and, if needed, don’t be afraid to say, “That’s a great question. I’m not sure what to tell you at the moment. I will get back to you as soon as I’m ready and I have the right information.” I would recommend finding some good books or videos to help the conversation. You are laying out a foundation and letting them know that you are a trustworthy and safe resource for both of them. If they have more questions eventually, they will know they can ask you.

How do you know your teen is ready for certain sexual health topics? I don’t want to give them info that they aren’t ready for and cause confusion.

Here’s the good news – you can’t introduce things too early! Discussing topics earlier than you think is often the best time. Do it before they are asking questions, because they can’t ask questions about things they don’t know about yet! Plus, you might not want the questions that come up from them learning about sexual health topics from TV, movies, social media, or their peers. Keep it straightforward, simple, and honest. Ignoring topics can teach them to feel guilty or shameful of certain feelings and thoughts and those are likely the feelings and thoughts we don’t want them to be hiding from us. We want them to get the right information from a person they can trust. That’s you!

However, you are correct – some things will go over their heads or maybe even gross them out. A child or teen, with Down syndrome or without, will pay attention to what they are ready for. It won’t confuse them. You can give them a whole spiel on some topics and they’ll pick out one word that piqued their curiosity, so go with that for now. Books and picture books are great so they can point out what they are interested in. I recommend many books throughout this article.

Now if they’re grossed out? Encourage that! Finding something gross is a healthy, normal reaction to something you and your body is not ready to see or do. People touch what!? It goes where!? Depending on what the topic is, reassure them that it is your body and your choice. Slogans work well with folks with Down syndrome. Try, “My body, my choice!” or “I’m the boss of my body!” You never have to do something you are not ready for, something that sounds gross, something that sounds scary, or anything you don’t want to do with your body or another person’s body. One day, it might sound interesting or appealing, and you will be there to discuss it with them in more detail then.

Some problems related to girls flirtation.

This one is pretty tricky if you want her to stop her flirtatious impulses. How can you stop a behaviour when you have no control over the reactions of strangers and others she is approaching? If one of them plays along, flirts back, or pretends to be her boyfriend, she will be positively reinforced and want to do it again. If one of them gets angry at her or rejects her, she may be negatively reinforced and possibly still enjoy the interaction with him. She has a desire to be included and connect with some cuties; who can blame her? However, I love that you asked not how to stop this, but how to teach her to do it appropriately.

Greeting skills can be taught and practiced with a speech language pathologist or through social skills instruction.