Now we are Outnumbered...

So we did it.

We had the open conversation that most couples come to in their life...do we have more kids?

So we had it and two months later, during a world-wide pandemic nonetheless, we found out that our family of four was growing. Trust me- we our ecstatic, but stressed. See we aren't just officially joining the "Outnumbered by Kid's Club". We are also taking a very nerve-wrecking journey into an unknown season of life.

Let me back-up for a second, so we can all be on the same page. We have two beautiful kids, 4 and 6, that have Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). It is a journey we never expected to take, but have been learning about it every single minute of every single day since both have been diagnosed. It is not easy hearing that one of your kids will have a life different than you anticipated...let alone getting a follow-up conversation six months later that your second child has ASD as well.

Our life was brought to a stunting halt, but at the same time started a marathon of unknown adventure. And the idea of having our big family dwindle down to just the two we had. It took us nearly four years to finally open up and decide we wanted more, regardless of what challenges we may face.

And that's where we find ourselves today. Taking the plunge and feeling like first time parents all over again, anticipating the unexpected with every new day. I am going to be honest- taking that pregnancy test and seeing two little lines, then getting a video from my husband crying happy tears because we were having a baby was pure joy. I couldn't focus the rest of the day. Slowly though, life seemed to catch up and the haunting what if's flooded in like a hurricane.

Did we really make the right choice? Should we have one more when we are still trying to figure out the balance with the two kids we already have? What if this new baby is more severe with more symptoms and issues? What if? What if? What if?...

Then something happened that we did not expect, nor did we ever consider. We told our kids. We told them that they would be getting a little brother or sister and asked them what they thought. This was such a pivotal and crucial moment that truly changed everything for us. They were elated. Both wanting a baby brother (and luckily that is what they are getting!).

Every day since we told them, they have committed to kissing their brother and talking to their brother. My husband and I realized that we never once considered their perspective on this situation- we just focused on what our response would be. But that's the beauty of a family. Outnumbered or not. Special needs or neuro-typical. Family is together.

This little man will be joining us in January. He will be joining our patience, our understanding of life around us, and he will be joining our family.