My Sister: Coleen is going to have a cow

August 11, 1967, Coleen Renee Sims arrived to make me miserable. I had no clue just how important my sister would be to me later in life. She is my best friend and the only person who has always been honest with me. She will get angry when I show this to the public, she will also be proud of what I say.

My earliest memory of Coleen is my very first day of school. It excited me to be starting school. On the first day of school, getting ready, I can’t find my shoes. Looking everywhere, I don’t see where I left them. They went for a walk without me. Mom is on to the tricks of sisters. The first word mom said about my shoes was a question to Coleen. Where are the shoes, Coleen?!!! I don’t know! She speaks. I remember thinking, why is she asking her? She told Coleen that if I was late because of my shoes, she was getting a whooping. Behind the T.V. she said, I looked at her and wondered why she did that.

Mom explained it to me after school. It seems Coleen didn’t want me to go to school because she was without a playmate. For the next 9 years, we were best friends, creating havoc and getting into mischief or trying to do mortal damage to each other. Coleen and I fought at least 4 good knockdown drag-out fights a week for the first 12 years of her life. I won 99% of all fights, yet was the one who had to run most of the time. Coleen learned about kitchen knife location and would have put holes in me if I couldn’t run. Or if I didn’t believe she would. Haha, I knew Coleen would have stabbed me given the chance.

Two times I got whooped by Coleen. The first time we were fighting over the dishes. Who was going to wash and rinse and who was going to dry and put away? Before I could get her in the shoulder, win and get my way, I had to block a haymaker she swung from the Gulf of Mexico. I blocked it alright. The knuckle of her fist hit my funny bone. Not funny at all. That hurt, the fight was over; I lost. Though, I paralyzed my arm from the elbow down. Mom told Coleen she was in deep shit if it paralyzed my arm on our way out the door to the emergency room, I saw a smile on Coleen’s face.

In the second fight, she won, we were fighting about the same subject. This time it wasn’t a lucky shot, she just kicked me in the nuts. I dropped like a hot potato. As I am on the floor, holding my damaged jewels in one hand and telling my sister if I caught her, she was dead. Reaching with my free hand as she ran screaming for mom. Mom was in the bathroom, pinched it short, came running, took in the situation, told me to stay put. Like I could move and go somewhere. Sis got punished, and I was putting a bag of frozen peas on my balls. That is the last physical fight I remember.

It was after that that when my sister and my relationship changed. I was 12 when that last fight occurred. Then I realized something about my sis that actually made me think. Sitting in the living room watching an after-school special, Coleen and a friend of hers came home and wanted to know what I was watching. I told them and suddenly out of nowhere thought my sister’s friend was smoking hot. With that realization, I started being nice and treating Coleen better, and offering to have her hang out with me and my friends. She was not buying the act, though. asked me why I was all charming now? So, I gave her the weapon she needed to get me to dance to her tune, I told her about her friends.

Oh, no you don’t, those are my friends she said. I already have problems with them about you without them thinking you like them; I won’t have friends if I let you after them. So, I didn’t actively pursue her friends, but if they flirted just once with me, they were fair game. She did the same with my friends. She was better at that game than I was.

We both got the shock of our lives when our parents divorced. It brought me and her closer together, and our friendship started growing. Nor did we have the friendship you get with outside people. Coleen and I agree she was a good fighter in her teenage days because she took the ass whooping from me. LMAO.

The teen years were my helpful years over her. Mom made the rule Coleen couldn’t go out unless she went with me. Fair? No, but that is not the way of the world. In Bakersfield, I had an after-school job and I paid Coleen to do my chores at home. When we moved to Arnold, that stopped because I didn’t have a steady income, so I had to do my chores. Then mom made the rule that she took care of that. Coleen and I made a deal that she does my chores, and I never say no when she asks me to go out with her.

The years with me away for long periods have made it easy for us to enjoy time together and appreciate each other's company. I rarely overstay my welcome. Usually have to make it an argument to leave these days, but then I remind her how good it is to visit, and that is because I leave for long periods. Therefore, making myself missed. Today, my sister and I reminisce about the early years and try not to bring mom into those conversations because she gets angry thinking back.

It is time for the submission for permission. LOL. Coleen, I am asking your permission to publish this article.